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tristram hand shandy

@dimestorewatch.bsky.social
1.6K followers 994 following 2.6K posts

naarm (melbourne aus). lefty nerd/gay villain/whisky robot. pfp by @thxnywy.art

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Kylie Eleison @gonebabygone.bsky.social · 1h
Every publication’s quote infographics are giving Clickhole now
MIKE FAIST ON WHETHER
HE IDENTIFIES AS A 'RODENT MAN'
"One hundo p!"
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disc horse bot @horsedisc.bsky.social · 1h
Eating glue is the weaponization of blockchain
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USER WAS BLOCKED FOR THIS POST @blockedforthispost.bsky.social · 17h
Dick??? You mean like, penis????
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 17h
sick of hearing about crude oil. what about classy oil
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bort @crushbort.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
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Todd Vaziri @tvaziri.com · 29/09/2026
A very good read. Pirating the Pirates - Notes from the underground of film preservation, by Devan Scott mubi.com/en/notebook/posts/pi...
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 21h
urgent forehead reduction surgery
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 21h
this is going to ruin the toor
Abandoned pack of whole toor
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Ian Coldwater 🧊🚫 @lookitup.baby · 23h
BREAKING NEWS: “Do geese see God” is a palindrome
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
[guy from the tv show silo] im riding silo, im riding silo
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Ciaran Martin @ciaranm.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I was wrong. It’s happening
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
tramp stamp tattoo that says
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PULSE.7z @impulsar7z.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
tramp stamp tattoo that says
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"commission me" -heron @thxnywy.art · 27/09/2026
digital neon text that reads "I'd Rather Be Looking At Pictures Of Butts On "The Internet""
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Nikki M @powderedsugarbear.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
You have been blessed by the friend onion :).
A clear container with fried onions in it the sign says "friend onion".
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Nothings Monstered @nothingsmonstrd.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
SHE IS ALL BUT QUEEN www.oneletterwords.com/weblog/?id=8...
"She rules this earth and conquers the air, the herpicide girl! with herpicide hair.  She is all but queen."  From the Duluth Evening Herald, 1911
Advertisement Illustrated with a black and white image of a stylish woman piloting a very early airplane cloth wings no cockpit
Herpicide was a hair tonic meant to get rid of dandruff and prevent baldness
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Lieutenant Kim Kitsuragi @kimquotesuragi.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
You can still like it, detective. Just because a couple of fools wrote an article doesn't mean it's true.
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
look i have my points of difference with the Youth of Today (this is good & natural) but yknow what they're completely correct about? pants. pants should have shape but should also be comfy. I reject skinny and embrace barrel, great job kids
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
deleuze on da car-i
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utility grade beef council 🍞🌹🍉 @cromulentprole.bsky.social · 24/07/2024
help i'm a bug
Calvin & Hobbes comic strip, 4 panels (B&W):

1)
[Calvin, being only slightly larger than a keyboard key, standing on a typewriter] With great effort, Calvin the Human Insect advances the paper in the typewriter.

2)
[Calvin, still small, now running along the ruler/paper feed of the typewriter] His only hope for proper medical treatment lies in his ability to write a legible message to his family!

3)
[Calvin, still small, mid-air while hopping on the 'H' key] He crawls to each key and jumps!

4) 
[scene from Calvin's imagination ended; panel brings us back to real life]
[Calvin's mom, seated at desk w/typewriter, looking at partially-done letter, irritated] Who wrote "help i'm a bug" on my letter to grandma?
[Calvin, regular-size, facing away from mom] Evidently some bug. How strange.
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USER WAS BLOCKED FOR THIS POST @blockedforthispost.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
this simply isn't nice. I HAVE NEVER BEEN A DUMMY. EVER. Check yourself
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Moby Dick @mobydickatsea.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
divide the spine
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Siobhán @shibbi.me · 27/09/2026
I just got done assigning genders to each of my body parts, and boy are my arms
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Don Moynihan @donmoyn.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Right before he his post mocking Tuberville, he had two posts criticizing Meta, the company that owns the social media platform that then incorrectly featured him a story about masturbation.
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Two panel comic. Panel 1: a bat hangs upside-down from a telephone line at sunset. The bat is in front of a billboard advertising the Florida Mega Jackpot, which is valued at $5,318,008 - represented with a digital ticker. Panel 2: the POV flips to the bat’s upside-down perspective, which makes the digital numbers look like they spell “BOOBIES”. The bat appears delighted.
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amy brown @amybrown.xyz · 27/09/2026
out on the road today I saw a wojack sticker on a cybertruck
cybertruck with a bumper sticker of the NPC meme that says ROCKET MAN BAD
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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 07/08/2023
devil on my shoulder: go ahead, try and shred a semi-soft cheese with a julienne peeler! nothing bad will happen! ah ha ha ha ha! angel on my other shoulder: there's no real ethical or moral angle to this one but i would still advise against it
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W. Caleb McDaniel @wcaleb.org · 27/09/2026
Currently reading the dog’s gaze.
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Slideshare Gems @goodslides.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
well that escalated quickly
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Luca @lucagalletti.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
“Your blunt m’lord” Vintage Reuge musical dispenser IG: @estatesaleedit
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JLP @jlp.systems · 26/09/2026
My name is Gayson Thotdottir
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bossk baby @bonnnt.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
SMAUG: wAAAAAUUUGHHHUAUUUHHHHHHHH!!!! WWWAAAAuuuuuughghhhhhhhhHHHHHH! WEEHHUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHGGGGGAAAHHH!!!
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Sean T. Collins @seantcollins.com · 26/09/2026
Let's splash in the dark www.instagram.com/reels/DdNgBG...
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I am in community with this man, he shares my values
"I was buggered," Mr Campbell said.

The trio helped Mr Campbell safely to shore and into a waiting ambulance, but not before they had organised to meet again for a beer, to hear the full tale of the Singapore Sling's voyage.

"He said, 'I wanted to make a Sunday sesh, it's what kept me going,'" Mr McCrae said.
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McSweeney's @mcsweeneys.net · 26/09/2026
"The central lesson of this cycle is not that Charlie Brown should stop trusting Lucy. It is that Charlie Brown must do a better job explaining why trusting Lucy remains the responsible choice." buff.ly/X2RjqP5
buff.ly
“Charlie Brown Must Stay the Course”: A Football Kick Autopsy Report by the Democratic Party
“While Charlie Brown did once again accelerate toward the ball, miss the ball entirely as Lucy pulled it away, flip backward through the air, and land violen...
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Jev! @jevbot.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
According to authorities, two. But actually three, alternative solution. Another says several groups, including gay.
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Jason Koebler @jasonkoebler.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
it’s forbidden content but i have watched this video of the AI songs a man made for his mistress after murdering his wife being played in court maybe 20 times today. It is one of the most compelling things i have ever seen
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Mini Aircraft Carrier for Cessna 172s only @toyotacorolla.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
The Beautiful and Mysterious Computer
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
im a joy to have around just saying
Signal message from another person that says "Btw you know you really got me thinking with your animorphs revelation the other day"
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Rachel Gilmore @rachelgilmore.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
War criminal and perpetrator of genocide Netanyahu mentioned Hasan Piker in his UN speech, and insodoing made this a clip that exists
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☘💀CROM CRUACH💀☘ @dr4i0chtdvbh.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
me: I just feel like lately we've really... what's the word lady who lives in my headphones: CONNECTED me: see, you just get me
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Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
I've got a tell tale heart situation going on but I just play drum and bass music really loud all the time so it's not really an issue
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Violet Blue® @violetblue.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Wow, I seriously need to check out how voting works in New Zealand
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McSweeney's @mcsweeneys.net · 24/09/2026
It's both their birthdays this week, so we must share this classic from our archives... buff.ly/F7QhXVL
buff.ly
Bruce Springsteen or Stephen King?
1. You take Mary out for a nice drive. Disaster ensues. 2. Bit by bit, this town is killing you. 3. Two remorseless killers careen across a deser...
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tristram hand shandy @dimestorewatch.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
I went rogue and drank a delicious cold beer several times this week
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Peter @notalawyer.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Jake Tapper (moderating the 2028 Dem primary debate): Final question. Do you renounce the Western Massachusetts lesbian bar? Pete Buttigieg: I renounce it. Kamala: I renounce it. AOC: I renounce it. Gavin Newsom: I will be deploying the National Guard to Greenfield on day one of my administration.
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🧩 @holojester.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
[positive guy falls off cliff] Y E ⠀⠀ ⠀S ⠀⠀⠀ s ⠀⠀⠀⠀ s ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀ s ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀s ⠀⠀⠀ ˢ ⠀⠀ ˢ ⠀⠀ ˑ ⠀⠀ ˑ ⠀ ⠀݁ ⠀ ⠀݁
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