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Alan

@a49077.bsky.social
223 followers 140 following 14 posts

Bluesky.

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Reposted by Alan
Gwen C. Katz @gwenckatz.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Things Gavin Newsom has vetoed this week: -A ban on secretly recording people with smart glasses -A ban on ICE agents working for the state government -A ban on websites selling your data -A bill giving native tribes more say over water rights -A bill protecting transgender healthcare providers
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Smooth Dunk @smoothdunk2.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
your response to “I was raped” should not be “I was right”
4 panel comic

Panel 1:
A Purple Woman looks distraught, on the verge of breaking down. She says “that man raped me”
Orange Guy standing next to her is absent-mindedly checking his nails. He says “Wellll, I’ve always disliked him and his work.”

Panel 2:
Purple Woman begins to cry. Orange Guy adopts an incredibly smug expression and says “Guess I must just be a good judge of character”

Panel 3: 
Purple Woman dissolves into sobs. Orange  Guy notices, puts his hand on her shoulder and says “Aw”

Panel 4:
Purple Woman crumples to the floor. Orange Guy, looking bemused, asks “Are you crying because you’re jealous of how smart I am?”
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headfallsoff @headfallsoff.com · 27/09/2026
particular attention must be paid to the completely avoidable PR own goal of disney calling the numbered movies "the skywalker saga," when no one ever said that before, thus forcing them to have some contrived reason to call the main character skywalker purely for brand management reasons
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mcc @dryad.technology · 25/09/2026
Why is billionaire-owned media suddenly coming all at once with pieces against drinking fluids. What is this manufacturing consent for. Is it building toward something. Should I be afraid
@wsj.com‬
You don’t need to make drinking water a part-time job since too much of it doesn’t have any real health benefit. @washingtonpost.com‬
Is asking someone to leave the beverages at home for an interview as fussy as reminding a lady to wear pantyhose or a gentleman to ask before lighting a cigarette?

We assembled a team of Post staffers across the newsroom — and commenters — to find out:
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Nate @cheersinnit.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Bringing a Capri Sun to the job interview but messing up the straw and poking through both sides
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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
can you imagine? just imagine thinking like this. you brought a little beverage here and I don't like it. I shan't be giving you any money
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bree bird 🇨🇦 @goose.ski · 25/09/2026
[image of saw gerrera]

People who become right wing because they get annoyed by leftists are weak willed, most leftists are annoyed by leftists every single day.
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Frozen Ocelot @frozenocelot.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Once again a reminder. Don't give them a damn thing and CANCEL YOUR NITRO!
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Katie Tightpussy, Editor-In-Chief @katie.bzky.team · 22/09/2026
gavin newsom you will NOT be president. you will fade into obscurity. you will be cursed to always have a rock in your shoe. your bed will never be truly cozy. your pasta will never be al dente.
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DBJ @deadblossomjesse.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
"We messed up 🥺👉👈" this is how stupid they think you are lol. I actually think if you steal 131 million dollars from people making poverty wages, you shouldn't be allowed to be a company anymore!
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Dr. Stephanie @punkrockscience.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
The fact that every major news outlet includes vocal tics and hesitations when it’s a woman saying “like” and not when it’s a man saying “um” is itself wicked telling.
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Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 22/09/2026
DoorDash has ripped off more than 260,000 NYC delivery workers. We’re making them pay $131.5 million — the largest worker settlement in City history. This is New York, where hard work pays and greed will cost you.
DoorDash messed up.
They repeatedly left more than 260,000 NYC delivery workers underpaid or paid late, causing them immense stress and financial difficulty.
That's unacceptable.
We've secured a $131.5M settlement from
DoorDash - the largest worker settlement in NYC history and largest delivery worker settlement in
American municipal history.
Every worker will be paid what they are owed, and every company will be forced to abide by the laws of this city.

LOGOS:
The OFFICE of the MAYOR of NYC
NYC Consumer and Worker Protection Mayor Mamdani and Deliveristas representatives stand behind a podium.Mayor Mamdani signs a giant check.Three delivery workers holding a giant fake check for $131.5M.
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Karl Bode @karlbode.com · 21/09/2026
for your future voting knowledge, Gavin Newsom was central in pressuring the AGs to settle their antitrust lawsuit against Paramount:
deadline.com
Done! Paramount Settles Antitrust Suit, Set To Seal Deal For Warner Bros. Discovery
Paramount agreed to settle an antitrust suit by a dozen State Attorneys General led by California's Rob Bonta, the last obstacle to its merger with WBD.
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Dan Whitehead @danwhitehead.net · 10/09/2026
The fact we have an executive class that doesn't know what to do with the Looney Tunes or The Muppets really sums up what a joyless, barren world they inhabit.
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
A dejected man puts his hand on his head and says "jeez, my 9/11 novelty shirts just aren't selling like they used to." Next to him is a shirt that says "6-7, 9-11" with the twin towers being held by hands doing the 6-7 weighing gesture." He observes another man successfully selling t-shirts and says "The Charlie Kirk guy is raking it in." The shirt he is selling depicts Charlie Kirk as Aang from Avatar The Last Airbender. The caption is "Counting or not counting Aang Violence."
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Micah @rincewind.run · 04/09/2026
“this person is bad so their work was always bad” is also a really dangerous view to take because it leads to - unconscious or not - a bias towards “but I do like this other person’s work, ergo they must be a good person” which, as we have seen over and over, is simply not true
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actual heathcliff comics @realheathcliffs.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
01 Sep 2026
Heathcliff walks down the street waving a white flag that reads "MEH" in large red letters. A man on a bench looks at the flag and says "I need one of those."
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Tuta @tuta.com · 31/08/2026
If you have a Gmail account, you need to read this. Google's AI now scans your emails and attachments, bank statements, tax files, medical letters, all of it. It turned on by default, and there's a class-action lawsuit over how. Here are 5 moves to shut it off, the switch is hidden in two places:
Image of Sundar Pichai and the Gmail logo
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Peter @notalawyer.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
for example maybe the next administration renames the lake “Sundar Pichai is a Bitch” i’m just spitballing here
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shaun @shaunvids.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
donald trump is busy humiliating the US in 10 different ways simultaneously and the democrats are spending their time condemning a twitch streamer. i know they're increasingly unpopular but that there's anyone who still thinks they're a real opposition party boggles the mind. boggles
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Robert Evans (the Only Robert Evans) @iwriteok.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
This is what the growth of surveillance is going to bring. Not safety from crime, but new, non-criminal acts redefined as criminal so as to give the police an excuse to exercise power. local12.com/news/offbeat...
local12.com
Police request public's help to find suspect who picked up $30 off ground in Walmart
A police department took to social media and asked the public to help them identify a suspect who found $30 on the ground in Walmart.
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actual heathcliff comics @realheathcliffs.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
24 Aug 2026
Grandma Nutmeg raises a flag on a flagpole that reads "UGH" as Heathcliff watches from a window. A mailman and a man watching his job look at the flag, and the mailman says "It's going up earlier than usual today."
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Anil Dash @anildash.com · 22/08/2026
It’s worse than this. Having been in the room with many of them (long ago, before I knew they were psychopaths), the tycoons who are left running the industry have an active contempt for ordinary people, including their own workers. They actively want to oppress, control and punish them.
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Lucy @lucyxiv.boontavista.com · 21/08/2026
exploding a data center is not enough. I need to hear ChatGPT die while saying it’s afraid like in 2001
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mtsw @mtsw.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
i think one of the hidden keys to politics right now is "how can our side make sure that the 'trump is gonna kill a bunch of beautiful wild horses' story gets in front of the millions of otherwise apolitical consumers of social media horse-related content"
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Abdul El-Sayed @abdulelsayed.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Does it ever feel like you're in a cage being watched? Well, you are. By Flock cameras, thanks to Mike Rogers.
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Evan Greer @evangreer.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
there is no such thing as "age verification." All "age verification" is actually "identity verification." You can coat it in glitter and "privacy-preserving" wrapping paper. But in the end, mandating age verification means mandating surveillance be built into software and hardware. Period.
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Rob DenBleyker @robdenbleyker.com · 15/08/2026
fuck google. gemini can't even set a timer without a 30 second web search for "how to set a timer". it asks to confirm whether I REALLY want to add eggs to my shopping list. we don't need generative AI for simple phone tasks. hope there's a lawsuit over the millions of devices they're downgrading
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actual heathcliff comics @realheathcliffs.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
13 Aug 2026
Heathcliff and several of his fans are laughing together in a big blimp with the word "DANK" printed in huge letters on its side. Heathcliff's girlfriend, Sonja, looks up at the blimp angrily, as a couple watches on. One of them says "She's tired of the dank blimp."
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Monkey D. Kewchie @astoldbyterry.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
I can’t be surprised anymore.
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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 12/08/2026
"no one will be normal about AOC if she runs for president" is both true and a bad reason for her not to run. you could run the most milquetoast middle of the road clean cut straight white man alive and the right is still going to act like the deranged freaks they are
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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
here's a fun lil exercise for cis people: how many articles would a publication have to print calling for your extermination before you would expect people who care about you to stop giving them money? and how would you feel if their excuse for still supporting them is some fuckass crossword puzzle?
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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
"Hey do you want to hear what the CEO of..." No.
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Comfortably Numb @numb.comfortab.ly · 01/08/2026
Sam Altman's kids
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Dominic @domoffinland.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
this guy gets it
Listen to this king at a Huntington City Council meeting on Flock Cameras:

"I'm not gonna waste your time, I'm kinda hungry, but one last thing. Every single Flock camera has about 2-3 lbs of copper and about 1-2 grams of gold. Do with that information what you will."
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earend | making 🐻🛡️⚠️ @earend.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
The "Jason figured it out meme" from the Goodplace, but the captions are:

LinkedIn figured it out?

LinkedIn?  This is a real low point.
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Iron Spike @ironspike.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
I am firmly convinced the majority of people who don't want anchovies on their pizza have literally never even tried anchovy pizza
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Kat Abughazaleh @katmabu.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
I have never seen someone so flummoxed by the concept of feeding people lmao
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Mia 💖🧡🩵🖤💜 @squeakitties.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
movies all look like this now
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jen ramos-eisen @jenramose.online · 23/07/2026
if this flag offends you i'll help you pack
a taco bell flag in the design of the american flag w the stupid thin blue line version except the stars are the taco bell bell and the stripes are purple and white a la taco bell colors and a blue line that is the color of baja blast
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heaumeau e. rotacism @vashwood.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
joining the war on taco bell on the side of taco bell
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Harlot🔞 @harlotprincess.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
guys, taco bell is the only place that reported the parasite on their lettuce because the trump administration decided companies don't have to report it anymore. that means taco bell is likely one of the safest places because they cared enough to report it anyway. don't be fuckin marks.
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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 17/07/2026
ENOUGH!!! RALLY ROUND THE BELL!! SCHOOL WALKIOUT MONDAY AT 12 TELL EVERYONE
in reality rhey're not after me, they're after you

i'm just in thw way

(taco bell logo)
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Casey Explosion @caseyexplosion.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
Rise of Skywalker I had any love for Star Wars strangled out of me by that experience.
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Kasey Gifford @kaseygifford.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
Its difficult to put my my anger over this into words. The modern Backrooms was born from the collective effort of thousands. That collaboration, all that passion/time was freely given because it made people happy. Now its being monetized. Its exactly like Ai and the internet.
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rue @deathcarpets.enterdeepfo.rest · 17/07/2026
evrybody mad at me:(

yes we are senator fetterman

 they hate
me so bad :(

thatis correct
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local blogger @fergoe.blacksky.app · 17/07/2026
Pretty concerning that this is increasingly becoming a tactic of the elite class to go after journalistic outlets by trying to sue them to death
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Kat Tenbarge @kattenbarge.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
Put another way, the entire adult userbase is going to have to upload their IDs to sketchy third-party companies and link their identities to their online activity to stop a few dozen kids from accessing a platform that is mainly left-leaning news and commentary. What problem is this solving?
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