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rubes

@rubes000.bsky.social
211 followers 199 following 245 posts

Cats, Twitch, and looking for a job. Eventually will update pics and stuff but I'm lazy right now.

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Reposted by rubes
ACARS Drama @acarsdrama.bsky.social · 8h
Air to Ground Message: YOURE MY HERO AND THAT SAYS ALOT BECAUSE I THINK ABOUT BATMAN ALOT Area: Philadelphia, PA, USA Type: Embraer 175 (Enhanced Wing) A: #a03819c28d9 F: #fb405327446
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Lori Schmidt @lorischmidt.dispatch.com · 29/09/2026
A cheat sheet for anyone who has trouble confusing teams: 🏒 Blues (St. Louis), Blue Jackets (Columbus) are different ⚾ White Sox (Chicago), Red Sox (Boston) are different 🏈 Jaguars (Jacksonville), Panthers (Carolina), Bengals (Cincinnati) are different 🟢 Ohio, Ohio State are different
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Brian Jay Jones @brianjayjones.com · 24/09/2026
Jim Henson would have been 90 (yup, you read that right: NINETY) years old today. You can celebrate his life by celebrating creativity, diversity, peace, imagination, and silliness.
A tuxedoed Jim Henson sits in a sea of Muppets.
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hammancheez but spooky @hammancheez.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
New Jersey 21yos at their first solo driving road trip out of state waiting at a gas station
static.klipy.com
Waiting
Alt: Man waiting forever for gas pump attendant
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Robert Evans (the Only Robert Evans) @iwriteok.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
bloomberg has a fun article today arguing that the Cybertruck is the biggest flop in automotive history. it includes this glorious graph.
A graph showing how the edsel and Cybertruck both performed based on their sales target and actual year one and year two sales. The edsel was expected to sell 200k units in its first year. It sold slightly over 50k, and less than 50k the next year

The Cybertruck had a sales.target of 250k in its first year. They sold around 40k, the next year they sold about half as many.
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DrawPlayDave @thedrawplay.com · 19/07/2026
Watching two teams not score in Metlife is pretty normal
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amanda moore 🐢 @noturtlesoup17.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Video thread - the evacuation of the Great American State Fair on July 4 took well over an hour. A little after 6:30, they started to shut down the main stage. People largely stayed in their spots as the automated message announcing the fair was closing played on repeat.
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Gerry Doyle @mgerrydoyle.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
I don't know, I think bigotry might be the mistake here but maybe I'm missing something
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Dag. @3fecta.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
Memo to Democrats: You can be cis and straight and the Republicans will still run a homophobic and transphobic campaign against you. Also there will be racism. So just do the right thing. Support the most vulnerable in our society full throatedly and proudly.
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Final Fantasy Randomizer @finalfantasyrando.bsky.social · 09/06/2026
Y'ALL!!!! This past weekend was not just our biggest live event yet but also the most money we've ever raised during a marathon, $12,500!! And once the merch sales donation (so far) gets added, you all will have raised $12, 842 for the LIAM Foundation! This weekend was incredible, y'all are amazing!
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George Wallace @mrgeorgewallace.bsky.social · 07/06/2026
I hope Spencer Pratt ends up in 5th place as a salute to Riley Gaines and whatnot.
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Coach Finstock @coachfinstock.bsky.social · 01/06/2026
Uh guys. Uhhhh. Uhhh oh my god. Holy shit
radaronline.com
EXCLUSIVE: CBS Looking to Pin Down Joe Rogan — Network Bosses Are Betting Podcast Powerhouse Will Strengthen Sagging '60 Minutes'
CBS eyes Joe Rogan as a potential boost to '60 Minutes' as the network battles sagging ratings.
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Laura Bassett @lebassett.bsky.social · 30/05/2026
Their new girlfriend is women
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Charlotte Clymer @charlotteclymer.bsky.social · 29/05/2026
Ooooh, are we sharing fables? I got one for you. So, there's this frog that enters public service, presumably for the right reasons. He spends years as a district judge, then gets elected to the state supreme court, then attorney general of that state. (thread)
An old, but apt fable:

A scorpion wants to cross a river but cannot swim, so it asks a frog to carry it across. The frog hesitates, afraid that the scorpion might sting it, but the scorpion promises not to, pointing out that it would drown if it killed the frog in the middle of the river. The frog considers this argument sensible and agrees to transport the scorpion. Midway across the river, the scorpion stings the frog anyway, dooming them both. The dying frog asks the scorpion why it stung despite knowing the consequence, to which the scorpion replies: "I am sorry, but I couldn't help myself. It's my character." 
@Wikipedia
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MLB @mlbbot.bsky.social · 27/05/2026
"He's a menace ... I WANT SPIDER-MAN!" J.K. Simmons is at the Mets game tonight and ran into a familiar face 😂
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Merriam-Webster @merriam-webster.com · 24/05/2026
to = ➡️ two = 2️⃣ too = ➕ Toto = 🙏🌧️⬇️🌍
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Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 23/05/2026
Freudian slip
Trump post with pic of Hulk Hogan: “We all miss the Huckster”
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Dave Jorgenson @davejorgenson.bsky.social · 23/05/2026
Colbert guest hosted a public access TV show in Monroe, Michigan a day after the Late Show ended. Guest star: Jeff Daniels Special appearance by: Eminem Musical director: Jack White Genius. youtu.be/jJTXB5uT_C4?...
youtu.be
Only In Monroe --- May 22, 2026
YouTube video by Stephen Colbert
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Popehat @kenwhite.bsky.social · 21/05/2026
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Nintendo of America [Twitter/X Parody] @nintendooamerica.bsky.social · 21/05/2026
"I hope we get a new 3D Mario soon." The Monkey's Paw's finger curls, as development on Hotel Mario 3D finalizes.
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Out of Context Mickey Mouse Comics @oocmickeycomics.bsky.social · 15/05/2026
Happy 98th birthday to our favorite dual wielding, cussing, kinky, super-thirsty bovine gal, Clarabelle Cow! You are a Disney legend and feminine icon like no other!
From Walt Disney's Mickey Mouse Vol. 2: Blaggard Castle

Clarabelle storming out of a room with a shotgun and a rolling pin.

Clarabelle: I'm gonna go ARMED!From Walt Disney's Mickey Mouse Color Sundays Vol. 1: Dr. Oofgay's Secret Serum

Mickey is swimming up to a very angry Clarabelle, who stands in the water, holding up a tube.

Clarabelle: If that jackass doesn't think enough of me to save me PERSONALLY, he can go jump in the lake!From Walt Disney's Mickey Mouse Vol. 2: The Great Orphanage Robbery

Clarabelle: Am I? Merciful goddess, I was never so flustered in my life = I'm so excited I could break down on all fours an' moo!!!From Walt Disney's Mickey Mouse Color Sundays Vol. 1: Lair of Wolf Barker

Wolf Barker is angry to discover Clarabelle inside of a sack. Clarabelle, not upset at all and extremely into the situation, flirts.

Wolf: Ya *expletive* idiots! Ya got th' wrong gal!

Clarabelle: Oh, you horrible man, what are you gonna do with me?
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Rodger Sherman @rodger.bsky.social · 15/05/2026
Congratulations to New Mexico Junior College track and field athlete LeBron James on setting the NJCAA javelin record and winning the juco national championship
A graphic for LeBron James, pictured in a shirt that says NMJC, throwing the javelin, celebrating his national championship. To be clear, it is not the same guy who play basketball.
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Out of Context Mickey Mouse Comics @oocmickeycomics.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
From What If...? Minnie Became Captain Marvel

Scrooge McDuck: But I also know that the one who owns the newspaper is ME and that it became the number-one newspaper in Duckburg thanks to my guts!
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Ashton Pittman @ashtonpittman.bsky.social · 02/05/2026
15 years ago today, Kate and William killed Osama Bin Laden at their wedding.
cover page of The Telegraph's May 4-10 edition creatures a large photo of Kate and William kissing at their wedding atop a large headline that says: Osama bin Laden is dead.

Smaller text above the photo of the couple says: “A day filled with romance, pageantry, and playfulness”
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Asawin Suebsaeng @swin24.bsky.social · 30/04/2026
Not bad, @benmckenzie.bsky.social :) youtube.com/shorts/Hkpfg...
youtube.com
'Get the F*ck Out of the Party' - Ben McKenzie to Corporate Dems
YouTube video by Zeteo
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depths of wikipedia @depthsofwikipedia.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
obsessed with the 17yo who gave an innuendo-laden speech nominating his friend for student council and not only led his friend to victory with 90% of vote but was himself voted graduation speaker. when school admin didn’t allow it he took them to the supreme court AND WON! you gotta read the speech
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Strahan Cadell 🇨🇦🇻🇦🇺🇦🇬🇱 @quincunctial.bsky.social · 10/04/2026
Neoassical
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NY Times Pitchbot @nytpitchbot.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
“Remember when I gave that LOSER Moses ten days to MAKE A DEAL or STOP PARTING THE RED SEA. Time is running out - 48 hours before locusts will reign down on them. Glory be to ME!” by Ramesses II, 1240 BCE
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Missing The Point @missingthept.bsky.social · 31/03/2024
Die Hard is an Easter movie.
Karl rises after death to try to kill McLane one last time.
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Damon Young @damonyoung.com.au · 02/04/2026
This headline makes it seem like Jonathan tried to cheat folks with cryptocurrency. But he prefers the shell game.
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Paul Cohen @paulecohen.bsky.social · 29/03/2026
this reminds me of the time i bumped into Trump in the Trump Tower concourse in 1989 i asked him about Fermat's Last Theorem--he grabbed a napkin from the Trump Grill and he sketched out a proof he made me promise never to tell anyone it challenged every assumption i had been told about him
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Katherine the Sixth @luigithirty.bsky.social · 29/03/2026
“If you’re gay or transgender, I love you. And if anybody gives you shit, tell ‘em Charles said fuck you.”
youtube.com
Charles Barkley: “If you are gay or transgender, I love you!’”
YouTube video by NBA On Fire
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Quest 64 Official @quest64official.bsky.social · 21/03/2026
Your brain: do I hear an encore?
You, in bed "shut the fuck up, holy hell"
Brain " Right about now it's time to rock with the bickity Buck Bumble"
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Micah @rincewind.run · 15/03/2026
friend, this is Marcus Junius Brutus CAESAR has declared himself DICTATOR FOR LIFE and MUST BE STOPPED can you rush a donation of ten denarii today to show that you STAND WITH THE REPUBLIC?
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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
can this be a solution?
strait of hormuz map featuring the big ass eagles from lord of the rings
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Thomas [DARK MODE], DO @tom.medsky.social · 06/03/2026
YOU ASKED FOR THIS! Downfall. Kristi Noem Edition:
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Andrew "TmsT" Kepple @theoddkepple.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
Steamed Hams but it's a Kelly comic (Yup that's right I still make "Steamed Hams but..." memes) #simpsons #kelly #steamedhams
Title: "Unprepared for a Regrettable Luncheon! (With apologies to Kelly)"
In the visual style of famed The Onion cartoonist Stan Kelly, Superintendent Chalmers is having lunch with Principal Skinner, who is menacingly placing a tray of hamburgers and fries upon the table, which greatly upsets Chalmers. Beneath one of the hamburgers is a wrapper bearing the text "Obviously grilled fast food".

Chalmers [labelled as "Disappointed guests"]: "B-but... I thought we were having steamed CLAMS!!"
Skinner [labelled as "Isometric exercising* odd fellows" - the asterisk refers to a footnote reading "Latest fad"]: "Oh, no, I made STEAMED HAMS™®! ©1996 Skinner family  All rights reserved"

From within the clouds of smoke billowing from Skinner's kitchen (wherein an American flag can be seen burning) three heavenly beings gaze upon the scene disapprovingly: A pig labelled "Actual hams", Krusty the clown, labelled "Hard-working patent-holders", and a teenaged fry-cook labelled "Ignored sandwich artists".
Lady Liberty peeks in the door and sheds a sad tear at this woeful scene.
Kelly's obligatory artist cameo has him disgruntledly commenting "Seymour-a bore-e-malice."
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FLAVOR FLAV ⏰ @flavorflav.bsky.social · 23/02/2026
Formal invitation to the hockey team sent,,, if any people with connections to the hockey team wanna have them email my team my bio. I’m for real. 👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾
Email to USA Hockey
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rubes @rubes000.bsky.social · 23/02/2026
Roses are red My friend's dog is a herder
CNN headline: "She wrote a children's book to help her sons grieve the death of their father. Now she'll stand trial for his murder"
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rubes @rubes000.bsky.social · 19/02/2026
Dr. Teeth, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Muppets
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Hemant Mehta @friendlyatheist.com · 12/02/2026
I was invited to the upcoming taping of the CBS/Free Press/Bari Weiss debate on faith between Ross Douthat and Steven Pinker. I responded appropriately.
hi Hemant! I work for the Free Press and we are hosting a debate with CBS between Steven Pinker and Ross Douthat on Faith. We wanted to invite you to attend, it's in New York City, being live taped for streaming on Paramount+. Do you have an email so I can send you more details?

Following up!

Christ, no. Don't hate myself that much.
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Arizona Right Watch @azrww.bsky.social · 08/02/2026
going great already lmfaoo
Turning Point USA on TPUSA X.com

UPDATE: Due to licensing restrictions, we are unable to stream The All-American Halftime Show on X.

Head on over to our YouTube channel tonight around 8PM ET to watch the full show

4:04 PM • 2/8/26 • 295K Views
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Alex Zalben @azalben.bsky.social · 08/02/2026
Don’t know who needs to hear this but one of the puppies on the Puppy Bowl this year is named Chappell Bone
Chappell Bone playing on the Puppy Bowl. It’s a puppy chewing on a blue and orange puffy thing
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Jeremy Hsu @jeremyhsu.bsky.social · 08/02/2026
"All ye bully-rooks with your buskin boots Best ye go, best ye go Outrun my bow All ye bully-rooks with your buskin boots Best ye go, best ye go, faster than mine arrow." youtu.be/cRIfsFefatg?...
youtu.be
Pumped Up Kicks (Bardcore | Medieval Style with Vocals - Original by Cornelius Link)
YouTube video by Hildegard von Blingin'
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Ken Klippenstein @kenklippenstein.bsky.social · 03/02/2026
Reno 911 was a documentary bsky.app/profile/kenk...
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