Reposted by Matthew Parrott
Woman walks into a Hull hairdresser and asks for a perm.
Certainly, he replies: 'Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?'
#NationalPoetryDay
Matthew Parrott
@parrottmatthew.bsky.social
222 followers 267 following 102 posts
42, father of two, a fascination with wildlife and aviation, manager at RAF Air Defence Radar Museum, Norfolk @rafadrm.bsky.social
![1
[TV show titles]:
SORT YOUR LIFE OUT
2
[STACEY SOLOMON and the team are outside NIGEL FARAGE’S house with Nigel and his girlfriend LAURE FERRARI]
STACEY:
So Nigel - you're a politician aren't you?
3
FARAGE:
Yes Stacey but I also have a hobby...
4
LAURE [proudly, but slightly worried]:
Nigel collects nutters.
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[Interior - Stacey and the team entering Nigel and Laure’s house. It is crammed with weird-looking people].
STACEY:
Oh my goooorsh
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STACEY:
Look at all the weirdos!
7
STACEY:
Where do you sleep?
NIGEL:
Over there
on the pile of racists
8
[Nigel is showing Stacey his collection of lunatics]
NIGEL:
This one talks a lot about UFOs in Doncaster
[He gestures to councillor Kieran Lay standing in a display case]
STACEY:
Wowww...
9
[Showing her Reform councillor Steven Lewis, standing behind a lamp]:
NIGEL:
This one thinks we are in a simulation made by Satan called ‘the Matrix’
STACEY:
So many types!
10
STACEY [voice over]
But Nigel is worried his collection is affecting his electability at work.
[Nigel is starting to cry]
STACEY [putting hand on his shoulder]:
Oh babe...
11
[They are now in THE WAREHOUSE where Stacey puts all the belongings out into zones. Each zone is full of weird looking people. They are labelled: RACISTS, ANTISEMITES, PLANDEMICS, MISOGYNISTS etc]
STACEY:
So listen Nigel,
We can't leave leave the warehouse...
12
STACEY:
Till you've donated half of these to Restore.
NIGEL:
I CAN'T DO IT STACEY
[ends]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreigx6bwqzzlkzks6uie2qpll5mp3nar2nhfek2rhvyq7prhk2datr4)
![That’s probably the most famous scene in the movie, the campfire scene.
I know. He said, “You can’t punch a horse.” I said, “You’ll never see it again.” I kept saying, “You’re absolutely right. It’s out!” Then, when he left, I crumpled up all his notes, and I tossed it in the wastepaper basket. And John Calley, who was running [production at] Warner Bros. at the time, said, “Good filing.” That was the end of it. You say yes, and you never do it.
That’s great advice for life.
It is. Don’t fight them. Don’t waste your time struggling with them and trying to make sense to them. They’ll never understand.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:yvbszlkc7d75ixkid5g2zmw7/bafkreiar4z6n6pfk7wob2gznv6l6euw7ltxbetgto5drfd4wqzjalldp5m)
