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trouteyes

@trouteyes.bsky.social
10K followers 292 following 3.7K posts

Captain of the Good Team. Artist, Visionary, None of your Businessman, and paperback writer for kids.

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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 5h
So cool that Alan Shearer cracked the enigma machine. Well played Big Al ✅
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
All ship's cucumbers present and correct Sir.
Cat stands on hind legs to attention, next to an open fridge. Three whole cucumbers lined up neatly on floor
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Roses are red Eyelids are blinky Something something
Graffiti: FISHTITS WINKY
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Butternut squash, Sandy? In a lasagne? Are you sure? Aye Tosh. Im sure. I'd recognise that texture anywhere. Served it up to me like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Tosh from ShetlandSandy from Shetland
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Reposted by trouteyes
trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Donkey looks out from a manholeEd Sheeran in a wee plastic hot tub
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Donkey looks out from a manholeEd Sheeran in a wee plastic hot tub
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
EVERYTHNIG IS WRNOG
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
NOTHNIG'S WRNOG
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
YOUR OWN PERSONAL JUDITH
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
How many Bensons should you smoke in the pub?
Twenty's Plenty road sign
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
She'll carry on through it all, she's Pat Waterfall.
Lady asleep in a big sofr cat-shaped bed / sleeping bag
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Please help me spread the word about my fun books for kids. These are French copies. So great x Stick one on a list for a gift for someone soon. They're good fun. Share the gift of reading X
French copy of Indiana BonesFrench copy of Indiana Bones and the Lost Library
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Lady DiRik dreaming a happy dream
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
One love What about the one heart One heart What about the Let's all get together and feel alright Theresa May sings the hits of Bob Marley, Saturday night 8pm, ITV.
Theresa May Sings
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Don't get out of bed.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Don't me... Jennifer Powell. No. Gareth Jones.
Derren Brown guesses something using his magic mind
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Twisting and ahouting are illogical, John.
Spock and John Lennon (with guitar) lean against a truck early 60's.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
And if I hadn't dropped the tomatoes, I'd have won third prize hahahaha bzzzt.
Robot entertains a crowd of people in the 1950's
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
This is what happens to me when I've had #Parsnips
Lady farts rainbow.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Did you hear about the dangerous criminal with the terrible haemorrhoids? He was placed in (wait for it...) Anusolitary confinement
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
My old man's a forensic pathologist, he wears a forensic pathologist's hat, he determins the causes of deaths by examining corpses, and he lives in a council flat.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
We built this city on moths and moles.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I don't like bullshit I love it
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Cannes is not Nice.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I've got nothing to say but it's okay.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Hi, I'm @trouteyes You may rember me from such tweets such as I'm a thin bald wizard, cndnsd mlk, and I'm Simon & Garth's Uncle.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Calling all Ogres. Repeat. Calling all Ogres. Over.
Massive harp in the shape of a scary, wingless, dragon type creature.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Ivor Cutler on the Magical Mystery Tour
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Pretend that we liked pretending and everyrhing was just a pretence.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
This year, due the economy, Mothers Day and Fathers Day will be combined to form a shorter and much cheaper Parents Evening.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I've bought a big new horse. Ooh. How many hands? They're called HOOVES Kenny, you twat.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Bottle of VanishVanish gone.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
'You will be hearing from our lawyers' - Chickens
ADVERT: Egg vending machine.
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Reposted by trouteyes
George Monbiot @georgemonbiot.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Here's today's column on the astonishing, ongoing mistreatment of people with #ME/CFS. Please spread it far and wide: the only thing which can break the media's wall of indifference is seeing an article about the issue go viral. Thank you. 1/2 www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...
theguardian.com
Abandoned, dismissed and gaslighted: there is no excuse for the way ME sufferers have been betrayed | George Monbiot
Changes in guidance and science seem to have little impact on millions of devastated lives. It’s a social crisis playing out behind closed doors, says Guardian columnist George Monbiot
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
If I have not seen further, it is because I have been standing on the shoulders of assholes.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
The answer my friend is blow it out your ass The answer is blow it out your ass
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Reposted by trouteyes
trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
Everyday I hear a different story People saying that you're no good for me Saw your lover with another and she's making a fool of you Theresa May sings WHAM! Friday 9pm Channel 5
Theresa May sings
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Reposted by trouteyes
trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Genie: You only have one wish, are you sure you want me to turn Jordan Pickford's hands into tambourines? Me: Mmm. Yes please.
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Reposted by trouteyes
trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
My #IndianaBones books written under the name Harry Heape are big fun. Comedy adventure stories that aim to #KeepKidsReading Get one for small person today x
' A super-funny, extra-exciting, fast-paced adventure' 

Jesse Armstrong
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Reposted by trouteyes
trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 04/09/2025
Tarzan's house, Beverly Hills, 1986.
WELCOME HOME CHEATER banner hangs outside a house
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
morn ng has broken i
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
YOU HAVE NOT HEARD THE END OF THI
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
cndnsd mlk
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
mnmlsm
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
NOT MY CONK NOT MY CONK NOT MY CONK NOT MY CONK Ouch. My conk.
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I've got nothing to say but it's okay good moaning good moaning good moaning good moaning
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Chinese photography students taking pictures
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The unexpected appearance of trouteyes
Cilla Black on Surprise Surprise set
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Let's get this SLOW on the road.
Painting the word SLOW on a road
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trouteyes @trouteyes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Bruce Lee remembering the time me and Kenny did armpit farts while Chuck Norris was accepting an award.
Top off, Bruce Lee smiles to himself while eating with chopaticks
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