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Aurelia Offbrand

@aurelias.bsky.social
183 followers 459 following 425 posts

You know there isn't a God because parrots can live just as long as us without teeth

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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Why does every other country get better cover designs than the US. Its honestly depressing
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
"When they wake up in the morning, we want them to not want to go to work because they are increasingly viewed as the villains."
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Its not agi until it can tell me exactly where the closest least bittern is right now
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Does Turning Point think Hitler, Stalin, and bin Laden are all in heaven....
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Gillian Brockell @gillianbrockell.com · 11/09/2026
AN URGENT EXCLUSIVE: Ahmed Soliman, the 30-year-old gay man ICE expelled in April to Equatorial Guinea, a country he has no ties to, was arrested this morning and cannot be located, his attorneys say. They fear he may be in one of EG's torture prisons. prospect.org/2026/09/11/i...
prospect.org
Immigrant Trump Sent to African Hotel Prison Arrested After Speaking With Media, Lawyers Say - The American Prospect
Ahmed Soliman’s attorneys fear he may have been sent to one of Equatorial Guinea’s notorious torture prisons.
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Could've paid off my student loans and started saving for a house lol
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
If you think you can just screen for female hormone disregulation then do I have a bridge to sell you called "gynecology"
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Spencer Ackerman @attackerman.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Not when he’s got his prescription pad out
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Aaron Reichlin-Melnick @reichlinmelnick.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Awful. Just awful. A promising young man, a high school honors grad who joined JROTC and dreamed of becoming a doctor, killed himself because of the Trump admin’s obsession with hurting Haitians and the humiliating shame of an ICE ankle monitor. His blood is on their hands.
A picture of a young black man, dressed in a light blue suit with a smart black bow tie, smiling as he is handed a diploma from a school official, a white man in his 40s-50s who is also smiling. Underneath is the caption “Pierre Damas Bel receives his high school diploma. (Family Photo/Instagram)”Bel arrived in the United States in 2024 in order to reunite with his parents, who had fled Haiti three years before. The family was granted temporary protected status, purchased a home in Springfield and settled into life in the U.S. Bel dreamed of studying medicine and graduated high school last May with honors and as a proud member of the Junior Reserve Officer Training Corps (JROTC), his father said. He was the eldest of three siblings and his family described him as smart and responsible.
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Tom Joscelyn @tomjoscelyn.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
“A Haitian immigrant who had grown increasingly distraught after losing his protection from deportation and being outfitted with an ankle monitor was run over and killed Monday in what his family believes was a suicide.” www.washingtonpost.com/immigration/...
washingtonpost.com
Haitian immigrant in Ohio takes his own life after losing temporary protected status, family says
Pierre Damas Bel’s family said he felt humiliated by an ankle monitor ICE officers placed on him after the Trump administration canceled protections for thousands of Haitian immigrants.
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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
This quote is from last February. Good work sir!
"Regulations, basically, should be default gone," Musk said. "Not default there, default gone. And if it turns out that we missed the mark on a regulation, we can always add it back in."
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
USGS used to be a respected scientific institution but now its just make-a-wish for a drooling memory-ward patient
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Aaron Reichlin-Melnick @reichlinmelnick.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
We are a broken nation. Hundreds of thousands of Haitians were living and working legally, paying taxes, and contributing. Haiti remains wholly unsafe. But Trump hates Haitians, and the White House wanted videos of Black people in chains, so they stripped them of status and turned on the cameras.
Homeland Security 7
@DHSgov
X.com
Haiti TPS has been TERMINATED.
Those with terminated TPS are in our nation Illegally. They have two options: LEAVE IMMEDIATELY or be DEPORTED.
DHS.GOV/CBРНОМЕ

Underneath is a screenshot of a video showing two Haitian men in chains being led to the aircraft. I didn’t post the video, but it’s vile.
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Rodger Sherman @rodger.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Remember if you’ve ever heard a Republican claim they’re actually ok with immigration but just want all the immigrants to do it legally, they were lying
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
Gotta get a goth gf by 2027
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
AI is just a mirror test for humans, some fail and bond with the reflection
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Faine Greenwood @faineg.com · 21/08/2026
I’m putting out an official discourse warning for tonight. take shelter, prepare a firebreak, lay in supplies, etc etc etc
Discourse warning with Alf
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lilya @lolifer.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
Thank you, Google AI
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
You know every single one of these guys has never been to a taqueria
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
My favorite type of violence
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InfoWars @realinfowars.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
Christ is returning soon. How will you as a Christian make sure he never learns about pornography?
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hermanos. @iamdavidbrothers.com · 27/07/2026
Homer called it a "wine-dark sea" because Cool Blue was the most popular flavor of wine back in those days. lost to history now, I'm afraid. climate change and all.
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InfoWars @realinfowars.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
Share this post to announce that you are free from both hell AND marriage!
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amanda moore 🐢 @noturtlesoup17.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
She described Guerrero as a loving, doting father and husband. “From the moment we met, we never separated again…He always told me, ‘until we’re little old people.’”
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
Send out the Federal Employee Viewpoint Survey you cowards, the normal one, not the pussy one that's being cooked up
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charles @libraryofbabel.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Fearing for public safety, he decided to discharge his weapon at a member of the public
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dr. rich traditions, JD @helldude.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
absolutely despicable. this is already one of the most putrid genres of written statements. and this might be one of the worst examples of the form
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Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 14/07/2026
This morning in Biddeford, Maine, a 26-year-old man said goodbye to his wife and daughter and left for work. Moments later he was dead, shot in the head by ICE agents, the second man ICE has killed in six days. ICE is killing our neighbors. ICE cannot be reformed. Abolish ICE.
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King Algamemnon @adamrothman.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
The message in chalk: "This is blood"
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Faine Greenwood @faineg.com · 12/07/2026
Goodbye Sweaty - Lindsay Graham, 1955 to 2026
Goodbye sweaty Lindsay Graham meme and honestly it’s kind of indescribable? There’s a erotic minion and a brat sticker and a confederate flag bikini and sonic and stuff
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
Anyone seen the Pete Hegseth ad at the movies? It wasn't even for any specific military branch, just a vanity project
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Arelis R. Hernández @arelisrhdz.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
BREAKING EXCLUSIVE: “That’s a lie,” wrote one man arrested alongside Lorenzo Salgado Araujo about DHS account that officers were rammed. The men who witnessed the shooting dispute key elements of ICE version of events — from ICE detention. www.washingtonpost.com/immigration/...
washingtonpost.com
Migrants who saw man killed by ICE in Houston say he did not ram officers
Three men who were in the vehicle alongside Lorenzo Salgado Araujo are contesting the Department of Homeland Security’s account of the fatal shooting.
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Wow, sounds like a more expensive, shittier version of The Amazing Digital Circus. It isn't off base from what an AI company does, which is steal a generous labor of love and make a watery puke version. It costs exponentially more money and resources but provides exponentially less human fulfillment
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Uwe Boll is such a bad film-maker it takes him 5 min to get his webcam working on Piers Morgan
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ProPublica @propublica.org · 03/07/2026
NEW: Geraldo Lunas Campos repeatedly raised concerns about his mental health before he died at Camp East Montana. Records paint a portrait of how the Texas facility's staff failed to adequately respond. with @texastribune.org
propublica.org
“He Didn’t Need to Die.” How an Immigration Detention Center Repeatedly Failed to Address a Mental Health Crisis.
Geraldo Lunas Campos repeatedly raised concerns about his mental health before he died at Camp East Montana. Records paint a portrait of how the Texas facility’s staff failed to adequately respond.
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muscular baby jeb lund @mobute.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
In addition being another unintended monument to the chasm in the president's soul and brain, the Freedom250 celebrations are a perfect expression of the Trump/GOP's vision of the promise of America: There is none. This is what you get.
truthdig.com
Don’t Bother Making a Birthday Wish - Truthdig
The nation’s 250th birthday celebration is a disjointed mess — and a perfect monument to Trump’s shuttering of the ever-unfinished American project.
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Nick Lutsko @nicklutsko.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
This is infringing my free speech. Please share the elf
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Jennifer Ouellette @jenlucpiquant.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Here’s Why Weather Forecasts Have Seemed So Inaccurate Lately. Meteorologists simply aren't able to gather as much data as they used to, and you're suffering for it. gizmodo.com/heres-why-we...
gizmodo.com
Here's Why Weather Forecasts Have Seemed So Inaccurate Lately
Meteorologists simply aren't able to gather as much data as they used to, and you're suffering for it.
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
Joe Rogan is just as responsible as Elon Musk for the death toll that comes from eviscerating USAID
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Ana Marie Cox @anamariecox.com · 25/06/2026
They're killing the cats, they're killing the dogs.
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
Is anyone's brain breaking that the richest man on earth is defending an Uwe Bowl movie. We're seeing the kitchens of Versailles and its just filled with literal shit
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 22/06/2026
I keep watching reflecting pool drama vids because it brings me great joy and now I keep getting pool cleaner ads
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
My kingdom for a bakery's ham and cheese croissant...
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Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 15/06/2026
it's notable to me that the administration tried to frame tonight's UFC event as a "gift to Americans" but you can't watch it unless you have a paid subscription to Paramount+
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Sarah Jones @sarahjones.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
did the Spurs hire an Etsy witch
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
When people were cheering over what these butt stains were doing in the fed gov I couldn't be too mad. Whatever they did there was going hit the private sector later, but with even less labor protections. Alot of bosses just want to watch you quiver in fear and call it efficency
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
We can't stop winning
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Aurelia Offbrand @aurelias.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
It is sorta funny that to Donald Trump Kaitlan Collins is some type of brain breaking eldritch deity just because she's conventionally attractive and doesn't smile at him
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Marisa Kabas @marisakabas.bsky.social · 03/06/2026
nick bilton is a bitch
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Jay Willis @jaywillis.net · 02/06/2026
After ICE deported Wendy Hernandez Reyes, it turned her 3-year-old son Orlin over to her sister’s estranged partner, who tortured Orlin and beat him to death. I can’t say what I think should happen to those responsible without violating this website’s TOS. www.washingtonpost.com/immigration/...
Because the service had been arranged last minute, the funeral home on a busy street in Atlanta could only offer them one hour.
Orlin wore a long-sleeved shirt and a tan vest with a striped bow tie and matching pants.
The clothes concealed his injuries. A new teddy bear was tucked beside him.
Embroidered into the satin lining of his casket was "Principito," or "Little Prince."
His full name was embossed on the coffin:
Orlin Josue Hernandez Reyes.
McCaffrey and Hernandez's sister had to hold Hernandez up as she walked trembling toward her son. Once she regained the strength to stand, she stood over him and stroked his face and chest.
"I never wanted to leave you," she whispered repeatedly. "I wanted to bring you with me.
My son."
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