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Noah Tension Span

@noahtensionspan.bsky.social
128 followers 158 following 589 posts

Master & Protector of the Inadvertent. Training to be Archbishop of the Niche. aseethe.bandcamp.com

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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 2h
Counterpoint: I could own Chicago this way.
"Life ain't all hotdogs & handjobs".
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
The Appleseed Cast performing at Gabe's Oasis. Casket Lottery opened as well (a band I never saw live in the 20+ years of listening to them) It was nice to revisit a time before eye make-up took a hold of emo. 😋
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
My YouTube algorithm is: Ethiopian Jazz TUREK Chill vibes HINSON Calm drone BOHANNON 10 hour space bedroom DANGEROUS LIBERALS Menu HE LIVES IN KANSAS John Cage 600 year organ piece CANCER IN THE WATER Video game trailers...
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Fake Muppet Show Guests @fakemuppetguests.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
It's The Muppet Show with our very special guest star [REDACTED]!
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Metroid Ravenous but it is Boz Scaggs "Silk Degree"
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Tracking vocals in my basement for an upcoming album and hoping the neighbors around me come to that conclusion.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Meanwhile, Penny...
Penny from Stardew Valley looking to punch you in the mouth.
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Jon Green @modestholdings.com · 05/09/2026
My. God.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Playing in Chicago Wednesday night with loud af bands. Spread the word.
Show flyer for SHRINEBURNER's record release show with ASEETHE & BARREN HEIR @ The Beat Kitchen in Chicago. Sept. 2nd.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Getting into this tonight. Pretty excited.
youtu.be
The Immortal John Triptych - Official Announcement Trailer
YouTube video by GameTrailers
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Drew Bissell / Floating Cave @floatingcave.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
SOMEBODY CHECK ON ELVIRA NOW.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Rocko's Modern Life logo switched to "Rocko's Modern Life Is War"
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Hourly Simpsons @hourlysimpsons.bagpuss.org · 21/08/2026
Let's get busy!
16:24
S07E09 Sideshow Bob's Last Gleaming (3F08) 26 November 1995
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Fake Muppet Show Guests @fakemuppetguests.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
It's The Muppet Show with our very special guest star Son of Man!
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Aseethe are heading south in October! Performing mostly new material with our friend Mike Boyd (Stander) on drums and guitar. Flyer design by the insanely talented @unknownrelic.com
Tour flyer for Aseethe for October 7-17, 2026.

10/7 - Columbia, MO - PDM
10/8 - Tulsa, OK - Whittier Bar
10/9 - Lawrence, KS - Farewell
10/10 - Dallas, TX - Double Wide
10/11- Austin, TX - Lost WELL
10/12 - Lafayette, LA - Freetown Boom Boom Room
10/13 - Baton Rouge, LA - Mid City Ballroom
10/14 - New Orleans, LA - Roadside
10/15 - Memphis, TN - Hi Tone
10/16 - Birmingham, AL - True Story Brewing
10/17- St. Louis, MO - Sinkhole
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yuri columbo 🏳️‍⚧️🏴 @psychpunk.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Run a website like it's a small town bar who cares
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Apparently my 3 current favorite musical tastes are: 1.) Ugly Caveman Riffs 2.) The prettiest acoustic guitar pieces 3.) Songs you would hear in an Express clothing store 20 years ago.
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Jesse Raub @jesseraub.online · 11/08/2026
damn sequel already
the one night only poster but it says one nighttle after another and bobbferguson from one battle after another is in the background
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
The Silmareal housewives of Middle-earth
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
THE BEST CUSTOMER I EVER HAD: "Say, you all carry those Castlevania olives?"
A jar of castelvetrano olives.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
CAT GOT DUMBASS SAUCE ALL O'ER THEMSELVES.
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Captain Pooky @captainpooky.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Damn the Star Wars Power Wash DLC only wants to pay $350 for cleaning a whole ass AT-AT walker. No wonder the Empire lost.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
(Don Ho voice): 🎶Liberal bubbles in the format make me happy...🎶
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[Sic] Burns @sicburns2.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
Jimothy spoke in class today 🎶
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
Neurosis at Fire In The Mountains festival. Siiiiiiiiiiick.
youtu.be
Neurosis at Fire in the Mountains festival (Day 2 — 07/25/2026)
YouTube video by 🐺 Jackal Today
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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
Marge 

THERE'S FUNKY WINKERBEAN!
OVER HERE, FUNKY!
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
C'MON. MY GUY HERE IS GIVING YOU DISCO ELYSIUM. THE GAME I ALWAYS GO TO WHEN I TRY TO START BALDUR'S GATE 3. IT RULES.
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Barry Burns @barry.mogwai.scot · 18/07/2026
Noel there’s a toilet around the corner could you not have waited
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Andy “voice of Brak” Merrill. 🎅🏻🤡🐒💩 @amerrill2.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Yes. I’ve seen the Brakrooms meme.
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OF QUARTZ @ofquartz.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
This is the first step in Taco Bell winning the Franchise Wars
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
YESTERDAY: Played loud droned-out metal with UK cavemen riffers CONAN & sick fast powerviolence kids RECESS. TODAY: Star Wars DLC for Powerwash Simulator 2. Life is balance...ish.
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Rocko Screens @rockoscreens.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Rocko's Modern Life - Season 3 Episode 7A - Fortune Cookie - Frame 106
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Michelle @michelleroy78.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
Women don’t like men. Women like those bowls that aren’t quite bowls but aren’t quite plates that are perfect for pasta.
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josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
My noise machine settings have everything from "babbling brook" to something called "merzbow"
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
Afterwards, Herb Dean gives the win to the pylon. Hurtful words ensue.
Sean Strickland yelling and looking like a yawning seal.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
Math is fun. Also, JFC...
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
Midwest meme contribution.
HARDBALL WITH SPECIAL GUEST ERNEST P. WORRELL.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
Wonder if #Sony #Playstation will have an app.
Domino's Pizza official statement:

"In response to trends in the gaming industry, as of 1st April 2027 Domino's UK will cease production of physical pizzas and shift to production of digital pizzas only.

Consumers will be able to download our full range of delicious pizza codes and, using the power of imagination, enjoy them in an entirely virtual sense."
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
My contribution. #wrestlesky
Hardball with special guest Don Callis.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Support your local Farmer's Tan.
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McSweeney's @mcsweeneys.net · 27/06/2026
Hmm... www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/our...
mcsweeneys.net
Our Open-Plan Office Failed, So We’re Moving to a Towering Panopticon
“The panopticon is absolutely not a fad. It is an idea whose time in the tech world has come.” Feb 21, 2022 9/17/23 9/24/24
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
Totally going to jail.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
My cat is screaming in the shower cuz he thinks he is people.
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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Pete from Pete and Pete intro. Close up of older Pete. Down the side says Pete but edited to read

Probably
Eating
Too many
Edibles

He looks like he's probably eating too many edibles.
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Vox Valentine @voxvalentine.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
thinking about the time where I wanted to make a joke about Sisters of Mercy to joke about goth music, realized I didn't know any of their songs, listened to "This Corrosion" and promptly forgot what joke I wanted to make because Sisters of Mercy fucking whips ass. moral: Sisters of Mercy whips.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
Too bad the dude who made this up won't make this a reality.
Shirt that reads :

ALL THAT REMAINS
The song by Bolt Thrower. Not the shitty band from Massachusetts.  It's not even the best song on Realm of Chaos
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
Washington DC's reflecting pool with Ghostbusters' Slimer.
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murphmama.bsky.social @murphmama.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
Gunter is a pool shark irl
Tiny vintage German masculine doll in a tuxedo and top hat stands in a pool rack behind the 8 ball.
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Noah Tension Span @noahtensionspan.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
UPDATE: RECESS added to this already heavy bill. Hell yeah. CONAN / ASEETHE / RECESS GABE'S OASIS IOWA CITY, IA. 7/16/26
Updated flyer for CONAN/ASEETHE show with Powerviolence band RECESS added to the bill.
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