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metricfuture.bsky.social

@metricfuture.bsky.social
1.8K followers 1.5K following 396 posts
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Braden Serkas 🎃 @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
The candy shop door swung open and he strode in. Patrons gasped and clerks hid under the counter. He put a smoke out with the heel of his boot, pulled another from his leather jacket, and gripped it with his yellowed teeth. "Oh my god," a woman whispered, "it's the fifth dentist"
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
While I don't personally think we should open casinos here (we'd generate more revenue by legalizing pot, which Texans ALSO spend a ton of money on in other states), I understand why it has support.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
got bass. in pocket. it's mottled. i'm gonna use it.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I'm only 5'5", but I try to carry myself like someone with a tall ass pussy. Just walking around like I'm packing a damn Tardis in my drawers. Power move.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Kevin Hearne @kevinhearne.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
How do we incentivize people to paint wizards on their vans again I haven’t seen a wizard van in a decade and it feels like we lost something precious Can we offer up a tax credit? Little bags of shrooms? Start a wizard van painting program at vocational schools?
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
FFS, her name is Dr. Overton?!?! This dystopia has the laziest damn writing.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Back in the mid 90s, my art school photography class started us out with slide film. You couldn't move on to other formats until you mastered it. It was a colossal PITA, but we all learned a hell of a lot.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Klaus Nomi: inventor of the Rubber Band Laser. 
Eat shit, Space X.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Same here.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
We also have clay soil, a high water table and earthquakes (thanks, fracking!). The idea of subterranean transit here is preposterous.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
My husband cannot stand full sized tomatoes, but he'll shamelessly pilfer the cherubs I buy for myself. I'm not sure if the it's the variety or the thrill of petty larceny that makes them appealing. You might want to try both to be sure.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Adidas is better than most: still committed to DEI, overwhelming majority of political contributions to Democratic candidates, etc.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
This is actually part of the early selection process. The Vatican initiates The Silly Sacraments (Funny Hat Vetting to the laity) for potential Popes *decades* in advance.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Stellbound: Stellraiser II @antlervel.vet · 18/09/2026
Share if you agree
Fat little chihuahua puppy (maybe?) looking extremely round and smiling lying on a tan fleece blanket
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Screenshot from the end of Mac and Me (1988): a giant speech bubble reading "WE'LL BE BACK" emerging from a pink convertible. This threat remains mercifully unfulfilled.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
worm @rfksbrainworm.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
we need more bats on here
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Surge pricing, man. The rotten core of capitalism expands unabated.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
journeyman folklorist @aniceburrito.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
1 month progress selfie
A mudskipper with its mouth wide open
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
I have yet to see solid evidence to the contrary, so I'm going to assume they're all "Land of Confusion" puppets.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
This bit here:
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Yep. Sucks a bit to lose Lubbock, I suppose, but it's worth to ditch Amarillo. Sorry, y'all.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
I'm fine with losing the permian basin and the panhandle, but saddling Texas with a chunk of Oklahoma is a bridge too far. Big Arkansas can have it. We won't argue.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
I've bought several pairs from ebay and etsy over the years. The vintage / antiques aren't terribly expensive, and they typically have a nicer fit. Just be prepared for some initial trial and error with the sizing.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
los 🦦 @los-los.bsky.social · 15/06/2026
los come in, we’re getting ready to go to the club me:
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
da share z0ne @dasharez0ne.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
RIP DOLLEY - dashare.zone ADMIN
A SKELETEN GAZING INTO DA FUTURE THINKING ABOUT "WHEN IT WILL HAPPEN" FOR ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE - "THE WRONG PEOPLE KEEP DYING, CAUSE THERE BUILDING A GANG IN DA AFTER LIFE FOR WHEN THE RIGHT PEOPLE SHOW UP - U KNOW WHO, I RESPECT TERMS OF SERVICE " - NO AFTER LIFE FOR ME IM GONNA BE STUCK IN SAMSARA FOR A WHILE "CANT STOP PARTAKING IN DA SUFFERING" - DASHARE.ZONE ADMIN
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
the mouse is bigger than a damn t rex. my suspension of disbelief is officially compromised. 🐀🦖
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
Nah, man. Salt n Pepa had a thing for short dudes. They were referring to Arnold Jackson from Diffrent Strokes.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
We don't try to pick fights with the brisket, as a rule.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
No. This is... atypical.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
I'd rather watch him lose an election, but I guess this'll do.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Fun @funkelly.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
a dusty little dupa to share with the class
A black rain frog, a little grumpy guy (you can’t see his face here but trust me) is burnt umber in color with little yellow patches all over. A human hand is holding them up to show us their backside. Why? Because they have a little butt and it’s very cute.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Noam @noamtl.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
How would I get by without AI? If I need a factually-dubious opinion expressed in a cliched manner with unearned confidence, I’ll just talk to a straight white cis man. I can get by on small-batch, locally-sourced, artisanal mansplaining, the way we always used to.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Hell yeah, man! Sign me up for legal abortion, decriminalized pot and universal healthcare. How soon can we make this happen?
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
(slack) it ain't nothing but a time waster (slack) it's got one friend, that's the coffee maker
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
Agreed, but 20+ years is a a hell of a stretch. I've buried 3 friends in the last year alone. We've never had numbers and we're dropping like flies. Cheer up, America!
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
hell yeah!
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Stevie Kilner @1steviekilner.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
If anyone would like to see a short video of a baby Armadillo having a drink of milk, this is your lucky day.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
✧𝔰𝔭𝔬𝔬𝔨𝔶 𝔪𝔲𝔡 𝔰𝔠𝔞𝔪𝔭✧ @altaudge.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
just having a light snack
a bat on top of a piece of watermelon biting it
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
Yes.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Lizzie O'Leary @lizzieohreally.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
Furthering my theory that this entire website is for people who owned Doonesbury collections as children and understood about a third of it.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Elizabeth Lopatto @lopatto.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
if you're interested in taking up a heterodox position, write an essay entitled "valerie solanas was right," boys. let's see how contrarian you really are
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Knit twinsets aren't especially hip, so dolls with pre-colonial roots might have to wear extremely uncool clothes to WASPY fundraisers?
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach...
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Matthew @thealtarofandy.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
I’ve watched this 7 times.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
every hometown’s got the ominous megastructure, what’s yours?
Pink and purple two-story opera house on the corner of a Texas town square.  It houses one of the largest used book stores in America, Recycled Books.  The definitions of "ominous" and "hometown" have been stretched slightly in the interest of narrative cohesion.
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Abby @arobertswrites.com · 10/05/2026
Humans are just busy work, God's real passion is crabs.
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 16/06/2026
preach. foul-ass dirt rockets.
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Reposted by @metricfuture.bsky.social
Cat Manning @catacalypto.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
I’m at the bread and circuses. I’m at the damnatio memoriae. I’m at the combination bread and circuses damnatio memoriae
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
Those systems inevitability lead to toxic hyperviscosity. Sheesh, men will do *anything* to avoid emulsifiers, amirite?
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metricfuture.bsky.social @metricfuture.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
Yeah, but your Pants with Resistance to Malicious Fog have, like, real pockets. Point one, patriarchy.
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