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Gabriel Morton

@gabrielenguard.bsky.social
1.3K followers 701 following 8.2K posts

A slapdash attempt at the slipshod. I am writing about every episode of The Simpsons. I have played every DOS game. Read here: keepetclassy.com/authors/gabriel Watch here: www.youtube.com/@KeepetClassy/strea…

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M. Alasdair @malasdair.neocities.org · 2h
sonic 1 death generator reading "cooldry zone act 1". best i could do
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Sick Combos @sickcombos.bsky.social · 5h
Keep Their Heads Ringin #crt #photography #DOA #TinaArmstrong
Tina and Helena are on a one way trip towards the unforgiving metal corrugated roof of the shanty buildings they are fighting on top of. Helena's neck has an important meeting with the ground // Dead or Alive Hard*Core for Playstation 2, photography on CRT television happy birthday to the ground 
my dads not a phone
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 17h
i have been laughing at this for 5 minutes straight
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Andrea Demetrio @andreadprojects.bsky.social · 4h
While looking for a couple of canceled game demos to archive (thanks @theburpman.bsky.social btw), I stumbled upon an alpha sitting on my drive since 2018? It was a Brazilian 3D fighting game called Bloody Justice, the devs sent me an alpha build but I can't find any info on the project anymore...
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Keith Stack-o'-lantern @keithstack.com · 41m
How often do you think James Cameron has to say, “no, not the Nickelodeon cartoon, the one with the blue guys.”
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Paul @pauljonmilne.bsky.social · 56m
here he is without his hat, from 2016
a drawing of a man stern man's face and his head pulped into the shape of a penile helmet
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Gabriel Morton @gabrielenguard.bsky.social · 1h
This looks like the best fighting game on the Amiga.
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bites u @snuffbait.bsky.social · 8h
good night
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🏎️ Shiro "Sugar!" Purrs 🐈 @shiropurrs.bsky.social · 3h
Previously I could have gotten away with calling this a "Bubsy 3D level of racing game" but these days I think that would be an insult to Bubsy...
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Hourly Twin Peaks @hourlytwinpeaks.bagpuss.org · 1h
leaned in to kiss me.
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S03E16 The Return, Part 16: No Knock, No Doorbell August 27 2017
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Gabriel Morton @gabrielenguard.bsky.social · 1h
Nice that the doodad for removing phone adhesive is also the doodad for killing alien bounty hunters
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Cerberinus 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🇺🇦 @cerberinus.bsky.social · 3h
Just continue to keep it hidden from the rest of the group. They don't need to know you've been bitten, it's fine.
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ana @totebug.bsky.social · 13h
golf games are so cool i wish golf wasn't real
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David Szymanski @duskdev.bsky.social · 11h
This game has very nice art
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maud @peloriemate.net · 9h
what do you mean it's pronounced "billy kahn" he fights with a fucking cane
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BigRed @bigredg.bsky.social · 17h
A follow up to this piece Rebecca rubbing it in #residentevil
Rebecca Chambers cheekily taunting wesker after dunking on him
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boobs are progressive and feminist @bapaf.bsky.social · 17h
An excited, expectant Sil from the game Rance looks at the player expectantly. The player may select from the options:
- Kissing
- Ear-cleaning
- Kissing 2
- Kissing 3
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aveline @kiddbanditpro.bsky.social · 8h
RIP PAC. Truly one of the best. I wanted to do a standing black arrow way back when but it’s so freakin hard. he truly made that look easy.
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Taigerタイガ🦈 @taigerarts.bsky.social · 12h
Jubilee🦇
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Megane Top Gun @dauragon.com · 13h
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Evil Con Fettie @spacebeer.net · 13h
He looks like how a retail worker looks when you’re paying on separate cards
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Skuff @skuffsmindcircus.bsky.social · 13h
Kenny Omega in a hospital gown, sitting up in bed hooked up to various IVs, is wincing while pointing a finger gun. Not pictured are his 22.37 km of intestines he lost.
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barleybap but she's dressed as a spooky skeleton @barleybap.bsky.social · 14h
We already have a perfectly good blorbo that doubles as an interface for engaging with software. He's called the Dragon Quest Slime Controller and he would never stand for this shit.
An upturned blue Dragon Quest Slime Controller for PS2.
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Wes Fenlon @wes.readonlymemo.com · 13h
Here's a funny thing that happened
pcgamer.com
After 30 years they finally let Ace Combat's director fly in a real jet, and I'm taking credit
This is what a man looks like after fulfilling a lifelong dream.
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romulus - 🛸METROID RAVENOUS🍽️ @romulusofficial.bsky.social · 19h
idk how anyone can see something advertised with ai and NOT immediately think of the Willy Wonka Experience in Glasgow
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Joy Content 🏳️‍⚧️🐒 @joycontent.bsky.social · 8h
we will not implement assets generated by ai into our games, we will only implement assets generated by ai into our games
"We will not implement assets generated by AI into our games." Capcom said in a March 2026 shareholders meeting. "However, we plan to proactively use it as a contributing technology to improve the efficiency and productivity of the game development process. To this end, we are currently exploring ways to implement it in various areas, including graphics, sound and programming."
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they’ve meltzer 📓📇🤼‍♂️ S. Qiouyi Lu 陸秋逸 @s.qiouyi.lu · 11h
we must discuss beast mortos running around in a pokémon jacket
beast mortos and mercedes moné
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Gabriel Morton @gabrielenguard.bsky.social · 4h
My cinema usher bite is healing up fine
I'm not a zombie
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UncleofJamiroquai @jessefarrar.com · 10h
friday night vibes
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The Other Happy Place @theotherhappyplace.bsky.social · 10h
Gumby makes me mad because I feel like no matter what I do I will never approach it's level of haunting unease.
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McSweeney's @mcsweeneys.net · 14h
Wait. What? www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/ten...
mcsweeneys.net
Ten Objects Around Your House That Are Actually Just Tilda Swinton Getting Lost in a Role
November 5, 2021 (her b-day) 1/13/23
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Perfect Alexander's Fujoshi Cuck @brutejussy.etheirys.social · 14h
they gave rat king an entire list of names for each rat to use for when he uses an ability. this isnt even all of them. nobody does it like valve does
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Gabriel Morton @gabrielenguard.bsky.social · 5h
This looks like it takes some big swings and I respect that
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Worst Movies Ever @worstmovies.bsky.social · 5h
Play-Mate of the Apes (2002) TMDB score 38% Three sexy astronauts crash land on a planet where apes rule. They attract the attention of human-friendly scientist Dr Kweera and the wild woman Uvala and soon unbridled female lust threatens ape society. #movies #moviesky #badmovies
Movie poster for Play-Mate of the Apes (2002)
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DOKI DOKI CRT PIXEL @crtpixel.bsky.social · 13h
MARVEL SUPER HEROES VS. STREET FIGHTER CAPCOM 1998 SEGA SATURN
Dan and Wolverine teaming up!!!
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Sarah Z @sarahz.bsky.social · 7h
Guy on lichess had a Netanyahu themed username so I checkmated them with a pawn
A chess position - the long and short of it is that black has castled and is up a lot of material, whereas white's king is exposed in the middle of the board with nothing. Black also has mate in one after black moved king to f4.


More detailed: White has a king on f4 (lmao), a queen on a4 a rook on a1, a bishop on c1, a knight on d2, and pawns on a2, b3, c4, e4, f3, and h2. Black has a king on g8, a queen on g1, rooks on a8 and f8, bishops on d7 and e7, knights on c6 and f6, pawns on a7, b7, c7, d6, f7, g7, and h7. Black plays pawn g5, mate.
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ande ˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ @andewitt.bsky.social · 11h
It’s right behind me isn’t it
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Mysterious Z (DATE OF BIRTH AUGUST 2ND) @mysteriousz.bsky.social · 14h
I love MK1 Scorpion's character select thing I'm sorry it's literally amazing
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Quasimodox @quasimodox.bsky.social · 9h
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Luke Ontario @coolhand.bsky.social · 13h
Miss this guy.
One more episode of "My Little Pony", pop a Valium. Fly to Finland.

Fascinated by Applejack's struggles with sexual identity.
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dreamin' @dreaminerryday.bsky.social · 13h
(fucked something up) pretend i posted this yesterday
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Rhys 📼 @flemishdog.bsky.social · 9h
Pete Smith speaking!
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Hourly Twin Peaks @hourlytwinpeaks.bagpuss.org · 11h
[SCREECHES]
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The Missing Pieces July 16 2014
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Lord Arse! 🕹️ @lordarse.com · 14h
MAXIMUM SEGA.
Various black SEGA hardware.
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leon @leyawn.bsky.social · 12h
i’ve got a new bit, now i just say “sorry i don’t speak chinese” in perfect chinese over and over until they get mad and hang up
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Slideshare Gems @goodslides.bsky.social · 13h
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the homophobic boy detective @gaorush.bsky.social · 14h
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GuileWinQuote @guilewinquote.bsky.social · 14h
why does the tiger r-zone have so much lore. why does it have so many variations. why does it have 6 fighting games. why is one of them battle arena toshinden.
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samphelt @bunysae.bsky.social · 20h
static.klipy.com
Boob Morning Breasties Ruri Rocks
ALT: Boob Morning Breasties Ruri Rocks
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E.G. Simmons 🍰 @ganglemanva.com · 20h
>if only you knew how dethpicable thingth really are
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