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CMTWrites

@cmtwrites.bsky.social
95 followers 124 following 241 posts

Reports haven't yet confirmed but C Thompson might be the thing that goes bump in the dark. Scary, weird and not quite human. Avoids writing but has three published novels

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Jen Gentleman @jenmsft.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Mood
A Work Chronicles comic - someone typing at a computer at a desk while someone else talks to them. "How's that urgent task coming along", the person standing asks, continuing "we really need to get that done by tomorrow - what's the hold up". The person sitting, who has continued typing this whole time, replies, "This conversation"
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Humor Satire Memes @funnysnarkyjoke.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Therapy is expensive.......but becoming the thing in the forest that terrifies the townspeople is free.
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Tom Gauld @tomgauld.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
My latest for @newscientist.com
Two scientists walk past numerous enormous shelves, each divided into sections containing a huge array of weird items. One says:
“We still don't know what any of this is, where it came from, or what it does, but you have to admit we've shelved it all beautifully.”
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Katharine Hayhoe @katharinehayhoe.com · 06/09/2026
I have a very respectable 20-yr sample size. While the number of men sending me AI generated content has increased, overall the number telling me that they’ve solved the problems of the universe has not changed. So for me, it’s just the mechanism that has changed, not the frequency.
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⛧ Mother Suspiria ⛧ (Stina Marie) @stinasdemons.com · 03/09/2026
This is one of the most inspiring and awesome things I've seen in awhile Human imagination and ingenuity is so fucking rad, and no thieving "tech" can ever hold a candle to what our minds and hearts are capable of.
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paulpro @mariopro.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
patreon.com/MannequinontheMoon
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
So tell me what you want, what you really really want
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Sky feels very dramatic right now #nottingham
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jessamyn @librarian.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
I work at a public library. People who want to use AI seem to have no trouble doing so. People who don't want to use AI have a harder time. I crowdsourced and then finalized this document "How to disable or avoid intrusive AI" and then gave it a short URL: notoai.org Please pass along if it's useful
An aircraft passenger oxygen mask: a drop down passenger mask with air bag and yellow plastic mouth and nose cover, oxygen tube has been cut; Demonstration model used by flight attendant crew for passenger instruction. Has text on the side indicating that it's non-functional.
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
Really looking forward to this #nottingham
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Ygrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
i've run the numbers three times now and it's always the same
a simple Google line chart titled "What The Fuck Is Going On" that shows growth in What The Fuck from 2021 to 2026, with a significant increase in 2024 to 2026

x-axis is Year
y-axis is What The Fuck

the values are:

Year        What The Fuck
2021	11
2022	8
2023	17
2024	19
2025	42
2026	84
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
Maybe thats why we dont see much alien life, they have all been drained by the space vampires, space vampires with powerful can openers
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Joseph Philippe Pierre Yves Elliott Trudeau @canadaspmpet.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Some advice for the uninitiated; 🤷
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
"Cowards die many times before their deaths; the valiant never taste of death but once”
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
What doesnt kill you, really screws up your digestive system
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Lauren Flans @laurenflans.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
It was the worst of times; it was the "fuck, WHAT?? are you fucking KIDDING me??" of times.
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Everything is pants so heres a picture of a dahlia opening #flowers #dahlia #notts
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Lar deSouza @lartist.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Editorial cartoon: They say things happen in threes.
cartoon: the corpse of Mitch McConnell, the ghost of Lindsey Graham and the convicted felon sitting in a row.
DJT: Good thing I can't count.
Caption: They Say Things Happen in Threes
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The Oatmeal @theoatmeal.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
Scars
A young woman and an Oracle are walking together at night. The girl asks for help going up a steep part of a cliff, and the Oracle ex extends his hand. She sees his scarred arms as well you’ve got so many scars she asks doesn’t that bother you being constantly reminded of how much you’ve suffered they approach a house, a cozy little cabin, and the Oracle and her entered the cabin. The Oracle says yes, but my scars don’t just show that I’ve suffered. He closes the door. The lights turn on the stars hit the roof of the house and a warm, ember glows from inside my scar show that I’ve healed says the Oracle
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
Hee!
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Moved a load of #books upstairs and my #tbr pile downstairs. Maybe if I confuse and disorient them, they will stop breeding
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
I guess this is the reminder that the thing in front of you, that you can touch, hug, give a treat to, is the the thing to love the most, not some digital bullshit
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
Giving up on today and retreating into this #4thJuly
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
A woman asks "do you have cards for things you said during a mental breakdown?" The clerk gestures "right this way, ma'am!" She holds a flowery card with many different fonts that says "Sorry for calling you 'Pathetic' during my episode.? She remarks "wow, there are so many of these and in such variety!" The clerk says "people are not doing well."
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
Wrong answers only
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Brian Bilston @brianbilston.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
SHAKESPEAREAN HAIKU Shall I compare thee To a summer’s day? Alright – Thou art very hot.
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
m.arcamax.com/thefunnies/w... 😂😂😂😂
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Oliver Brackenbury @obrackenbury.bsky.social · 02/06/2026
Tumblr screenshot of a post by abbiistabbii that reads:

The Germans really cooked making "Hobbyless behaviour" an insult. It is both devastating, applicable to a wide range of people and behaviours, and doesn't resort to swearing.

Man ranting on the internet about the Superbowl halftime show or complaining that something is "woke"? Hobbyless Behaviour. Girls mocking another girl for not looking right? Hobbyless Behaviour. Mindless vandalism? Hobbyless Behaviour.

It is more powerful than "get a life" or the English "You're Sad" because it gets to the central point of the matter, and that is wonderful. Danke, Deutsch.
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 17/05/2026
Be the evil stepmother, its shit but atleast you will look fabolous
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 17/05/2026
Not saying its been a slow weekend but my biggest accomplishment is that I put headphones on my skull
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hotsietozzi @hotsietozzi.bsky.social · 14/05/2026
I hate when I wake up too early in the US and Bluesky is all: Lord Minister Flafferbunt and Glennsders at 12 Pembertwine reject Klorus Singular Berthwaits Pinkerbushwells push for Pobbelwaggins Clip Clopp
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WeRateDogs @weratedogs.com · 23/03/2026
This is Stanley. He just helped solve a 160-year-old murder by digging up a bottle of poison in his backyard. Just two doors down in 1865, Mary Ann Ashford poisoned her husband's tea to be with her younger lover. Since his discovery, Stanley has stopped digging. 15/10
Stanley stares into the distance. there is an inset of an empty blue bottle of poison
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Tom Gauld @tomgauld.bsky.social · 07/03/2026
My cartoon for this week’s @newscientist.com
Two scientists walk through a cluttered old-fashioned science laboratory.

The female scientist says 
“Analogue instruments! Paper records! Chalk boards! I thought you'd agreed to modernise the laboratory?”

The male scientist replies
“That's what i'm so excited about: we have moved to cloud-based storage for our data!”

They step out onto a balcony. She says:
“Please tell me you haven't built a library zeppelin” 

This is exactly what he has done. It floats across the sky and he adds
“It's got a fax machine!”
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Graham Annable @grickle.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
Be yourself. #grickledoodle #death #pretty #cartoon #art #drawing #funny #humor
A cartoon illustration of the grim reaper wearing a flowery robe, admiring himself in the mirror. Caption reads "Death felt pretty that day."
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Tim Minchin @timminchin.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
In honour of the BAFTAS tonight… here’s my opening number from the very hilarious year of 2020, when the great Richard Ayoade was virtually hosting the virtual ceremony. I hope this year is more fun and I hope everyone gets a medal.   #DigitalHouseOfTimothy #Backstory #BAFTAs #EliseMcCann
youtu.be
Tim Minchin Performs Hilarious Original BAFTA Song | BAFTA TV Awards 2020
YouTube video by BAFTA
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 14/02/2026
Waaay ahead of you baby
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 09/02/2026
New life goals
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 30/01/2026
The roof just started leaking, feels like normality is restored
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 30/01/2026
Not saying its been a while since I was on a bus but currently marvelling over the fact they take card now and there are usb chargers built in the seats
media.tenor.com
a cartoon character with the words what a time to be alive below him
ALT: a cartoon character with the words what a time to be alive below him
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Adam Sharp @adamcsharp.bsky.social · 26/01/2026
Five phrases about the transitory nature of all things... 1. Nothing is eternal (Farsi) 2. No one’s candle is lit till dawn (Serbian) 3. No evil shall last a hundred years (Spanish) 4. All snowstorms eventually subside (Icelandic) 5. Everything has an end, except the sausage, which has two (German)
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 06/01/2026
All hail Snorse
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 03/01/2026
Already done with 2026. Wake me when its 2027
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Rebecca Hicks (She/Her) @rhicks.bsky.social · 03/01/2026
It's J.R.R. Tolkien's birthday today, so raise a glass to the professor. In evil times like these, works like his remind us that "in the end, it’s only a passing thing… this shadow. Even darkness must pass." And it will pass, but only with our collective effort.
A digital painting of an older J.R.R. Tolkien smoking a pipe. It was drawn and painted by me, a real human, using Clip Studio. Also don't smoke, kids. It does not make you look cool or turn you into a wizard or fantasy author.
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 01/01/2026
Happy New-ish year everyone!
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Tom Gauld @tomgauld.bsky.social · 27/12/2025
My latest cartoon for @theguardian.com books.
The 27th of December... 

“I think Dad got too many books for christmas this year.” Says a daughter.

“Don't worry, he'll get through them.” Says the mother, looking up from her book.

“But until then..?” Asks the daughter.

“He'll be fine on turkey sandwiches until he's reduced the front  piles” 

The father is completely surrounded by high teetering walls of stacked books. He is reading within and the daughter has thrown a sandwich in to him.
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 25/12/2025
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good morning
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Democratic Activists @democratswin.bsky.social · 20/12/2025
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Lar deSouza @lartist.bsky.social · 10/12/2025
Cartoon: Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle balrog!
cartoon: 3 panel cartoon.
panel 1: close up of wizard hands holding a book. 
SFX BOOM jingle jingle jingle
That's the jingle bell!
panel 2: hobbit and wizard looking panicked 
SFX BOOM jingle jingle jingle
That's the jingle bell!
panel 3: The Fellowship faces a large demon creature which is dressed in a Santa outfit
That's the Jingle Balrog!
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CMTWrites @cmtwrites.bsky.social · 03/12/2025
This gives new meaning to dodgy job postings
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Tom Gauld @tomgauld.bsky.social · 31/10/2025
Three @theguardian.com books cartoons from previous halloweens: 1. Haunted Bookshop
Reasons to visit your local haunted bookshop:

Open Until Very Late (image: moonlit bookshop)
Staff with nine hundred years experience (image: skeleton bookseller)
Home delivery by Headless Hoseman or flying fiend (image: deliveries being made)
Readings from famous authors (Image: Shakespeare zombie)
Stay and browse forever (Image ghost in a bookshop)
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