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Brett Weed

@tarheelphan.bsky.social
1.3K followers 1.1K following 2.3K posts

Public health scientist, dad to a pack of three girls and three dogs, and adjunct at Johns Hopkins and UC Riverside. Lesser half of @carolinalaw08.bsky.social

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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 2h
L
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 18h
This gritty?
static.klipy.com
Gritty Surprises Stephen Colbert at the Door
Alt: Gritty Surprises Stephen Colbert at the Door
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clownpenis.fartlow @kvarnsen.bsky.social · 23h
ok guys fr is this going to be resolved before the next
Riyadh Comedy Festival
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Lyta 🐅 Dangerous Fictions is OUT 🐅 Gold @lytagold.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
horror story in five words challenge: “Ross Douthat YA fantasy novel”
Screenshot of a fuckin tweet from actual publisher WordOnFire (heard of them before? I hadn’t) that reads “Brand-new novel from bestselling author
@Douthat60, The Falcon's Children, is available for preorder now: amazon.com/dp/1685783775
This novel will be released through Word on Fire Luminor in June 2027.” There’s an image of the terrible cover that looks like shit and Douthat’s awful face. I checked the amazon link and it’s real, God help us all
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
All the still-extant Class I railroads are desperately hoping you don’t by a t-shirt of their branding
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
I’d say they could burn some sage, but not sure there’s enough seasonings within the city limits to accomplish that
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Our husky mix, Margaret Hamilton Weed, was named such to honor her. RIP to a titan of science and engineering.
A husky mix named in honor of Margaret Hamilton
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Randall Munroe @xkcd.com · 07/10/2026
Spectrum Allocation xkcd.com/3307/
Comic: Modern Spectrum Allocation Chart. [Long line of rectangles of different widths in shades of gray. From top to bottom: radio (shouting), TV test patterns, 1G cellular, radio (music), radio (static), reserved for zeppelin navigation, TV channels 2, 5, 7-13, 16, 17, and 28 with 2G cellular in between, interference, WKRP in Cincinnati, spaceship beeps, all other TV, car dealership ads, numbers stations, weather balloons, amateur radio, HAM radio, “weather balloons”, *Choosing Texas* 24/7, [extra large rectangle] boat captains say they need this for something and we don’t ask what because they’re scary, the secret radio waves that make planes stay up, defunct satellite phone company, radioastronomy, radioastrology, [extra small rectangle] all modern wireless infrastructure, death rays, LoFi hip hop beats to relax/study to, security guard walkie talkies, amateur military satellites, left open in case aliens try to call, one brand of garage door openers with a lot of political pull.]
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Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Mason Miller's on the paternity list. Second Padres pitcher to go on paternity leave this postseason. #NominativeDeterminism
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Shameless use of explicit, undiluted sexuality to achieve your goal
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
And wasn’t “pneumonia of unknown etiology” how Russia classified the majority of their COVID cases previously?
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The Map Center @mapcenter.com · 05/10/2026
Strategically located between the Delaware and Schuykill Rivers, Philadelphia has immense resource advantages in access to the Atlantic and the Interior. Were all human knowledge lost, we would never replicate language or culture but we would probably reinvent math, science and Philadelphia.
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mattie lubchansky @mattielubchansky.com · 05/10/2026
no....no!!!!!
lowly worm is now driving the trolley problem trolley :(
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
On Etsy when
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delco de leche @delcodeleche.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
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Billy Hurley @billyhurls.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
There is no McTry. There is only:
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Aaron D. Proctor @racetoperu.neocities.org · 04/10/2026
Live look-in at some of the best players on the Eagles:
An ambulance
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Boooooooooooo
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Go Birds #gluttonforpunishment
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Public health problems are never fully solved. It’s why we need a rear guard to protect the gains we’ve made in the past (says the guy fighting dysentery and such). 🛟💉
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Michael Crawford @michaelcrawford.com · 03/10/2026
The most savvy ad placement I've ever seen on the internet... @joeovies.bsky.social
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Sickos Committee @sickoscommittee.org · 03/10/2026
NO THE STANFORD ACC EXPERIMENT MUST CONTINUE
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Horrifically, no, this is a third such example.
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Also heard about an incident at a conference where a symptomatic competitive dancer wouldn’t stop and by the end others were slipping on the puddles. The outbreak followed shortly after. #EntericsForTheWin
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
The question from that one is who had active, symptomatic shigellosis and though “what I need to do is a mud run”
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John Foley @2008philz.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Greatest graph I have ever seen in my life
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ACARS Drama @acarsdrama.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Air to Ground Message: WILL YOU LET XXX X KNOW THAT HE LEFT HIS BRAIN IN THE HOTEL RECEPTION. THANK YOU. Area: Stockholm, Sweden Type: Airbus A320neo A: #a4a6ac08a92 F: #fa0a1801b15
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
This is how you get different agencies tracking different arms
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
A foodstuff of ill repute of late www.cdc.gov/salmonella/o...
cdc.gov
Salmonella Outbreak Linked to Pistachio Cream
Information about an outbreak of Salmonella linked to pistachio cream.
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I feel attacked
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
What are the Potato Gnomes of False London?
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Justin Klugh @justinklugh.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Yeah. Sure. The Phillies are down to their last shot. But so were the 1976 Phillies, just shy of 50 years ago. And you know what happened to them? That's right. They were called "the hollow men of the baseball postseason" by their hometown paper and swept out of the playoffs.
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Happy to report that (not at all apocryphal) story still circulates in Chapel Hill. It may be used as an example in statistics courses.
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one dozen bats at a keyboard @panasonicdx4500.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
LeBron is a Sixer, Eagles play MNF, Phillies playoff baseball tomorrow, Flyers season opener on Wednesday. Enjoy this two hour window where everything’s happening and none of it has turned to ash in our hands yet.
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Chudlodipine
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
It is both gratifying and mortifying when one’s professional life is within the aiming sights of satire.
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
theonion.com/phoebe-bridg...
theonion.com
Phoebe Bridgers Postpones Concert After Experiencing Twinge Of Happiness
INDIANAPOLIS—Profusely apologizing for the unexpected and last-minute cancellation, singer-songwriter Phoebe Bridgers announced Monday that she was postponing her show at Gainbridge Fieldhouse after e...
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Cincinnati Retribution Pigeons would be a hell of a band name
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Go birds
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
My grandfather was infantry at Anzio. I know he got a silver star and a Purple Heart for leaving a foxhole to bring his injured commanding officer to safety. One of the few details he did share was of being pinned down in a turnip field and having to eat them raw. Never touched another in his life.
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Worries about my rear are precisely why I don’t eat raw oysters
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Brett Weed @tarheelphan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I am desperately trying to find a joke here, but I am kinda just speechless. (The entire Vibrio family can go back to hell where it came from, though).
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Michael Bazaco @mcbazacophd.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
We’ve reached that time of year where I have an internal struggle about which annoys me more: 1. anatomically inaccurate decorative skeletons 2. people who are outraged about decorative skeletons being anatomically inaccurate.
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The Good Phight @thegoodphight.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
static.klipy.com
Toy Story Sarge: An Honor Serving With You
ALT: Toy Story Sarge: An Honor Serving With You
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Alejandro Montenegro @aemonten.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
That the Oxford comma is essential, and I will add it to all your manuscripts.
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Shane McNichol @ontheshanetrain.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
how am I just learning that a group of Eagles fans threw a press conference to fight new parking lot regulations Every second of it looks like an Always Sunny plot
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Katie Martin @katie0martin.ft.com · 25/09/2026
I have blamed The agents That hacked Your website And which You probably Reasonably thought I controlled Forgive me I am rich And unaccustomed To taking responsibility
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Gwen C. Katz @gwenckatz.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Fuck ChatGPT flyers. The future is broadsheets.
A crowded broadsheet with way too many fonts. It says:
Forget ChatGPT Flyers
Say it with 
Broadsheets
Unlimited fonts
Stretch them
Or cram a really long sentence into one line for no good reason
No whitespace
Mix capital and lowercase
Pointing hands
(They're called manicules!)
Don't be left behind
Broadsheets are the future
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