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Schrödinger’s Squirrel

@scuffleuffagus.bsky.social
13K followers 12K following 1.3K posts

Occasionally profane. Frequently snarky. Always blue. 🆘🗽 Jersey girl chillin' in the PNW. History doesn't repeat itself, but It often rhymes. – Mark Twain, maybe

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𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.lol · 16h
“Did you or did you not sell hamburgers from a giant smiling head?” “Sir, that was Jack in the Box.”
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The Mouthy Renegade Writer @mouthyrenegade.bsky.social · 15h
That would be much more useful than learning how to do-si-do.
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Princess Cuntwrap Supreme 🇺🇦 @elisabethinwa.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
We are all dead and this is hell. No other explanation
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Covie @covie93.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
If ashli babbitt's family can get $5 million after she literally broke into the Capitol to overturn an election, Renee Good's family should get at least triple that for ICE agents murdering her in the damn street.
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Bob Ballentine @raballentine.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
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Ann @lifeinthepnw.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Dear Eric Schmitt: Other places where Jack Smith was not on February 3 — Skateboarding with Tony Hawk Watching a Howard Hawks film Visiting Ethan Hawke Jamming with Hamish Hawk At a Seattle Seahawks game At a Chicago Blackhawks game Birdwatching Cooper’s hawks …but now he’s watching you like a hawk
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Tea Pain @teapainusa.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
After yesterday’s Senate hearing, it’s crystal clear that Jack Smith should be the next Attorney General.
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Patrick De Klotz @patdeklotz.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
“Maybe it would stop the cratering in the polls if we humiliated ourselves while trying to tar a guy who spent his career fighting for the rule of law and going after war criminals while we defend a coup attempt” - GOP Senate strategy session this morning, apparently
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kenofseattle @kenofseattle.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Through US history, no matter how bad they might have been, the title of US president commanded some respect, some authority, Until this f'ing 🍊🤡. Now it's just an embarrassing joke.
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A. Sharpie @asharpie.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
SCHMITT: Mr. Smith, did you attend a Green Bay Packers game? SMITH: No. but I once rode in a Packard at a classic car show. SCHMITT: So you admit it! SMITH: I admit I rode in a Packard. SCHMITT: And was that in Green Bay? SMITH: No. SCHMITT: But it could have been? AM I CORRECT??!!
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Michelle @michelleroy78.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I've come to the point where the word "fuck" is no longer strong enough to suit my needs.
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God @thegodshow.com · 29/09/2026
Robert Reich just dropped a Rahm Emanuel diss-track and it goes hard af. Not saying it’s a Kendrick / Drake level beef, but it’s close.
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Ron Filipkowski @ronfilipkowski.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Putin’s reward for bombing hospitals, schools, apartment buildings, public parks and museums and killing children is to get invited to the G20 Summit by Marco Rubio.
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Roger ZenAF 🖕🐸🖕 @rogerzenaf.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
For those who don't know - Lilly Wachowski wrote The Matrix.
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chercat208.bsky.social @chercat208.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Ever notice how everyone screaming about cutting social security as an 'entitlement' are the politicians who will retire with a comfy pension or the obscenely wealthy who have enough money for a thousand lifetimes? Raise the damn cap!!!
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Muscular Christianity definitely probably does not sound like a suspiciously sticky 1996 vhs movie sold behind the green door at Sketchy's Video and Smoke Shop.
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ℝ𝕖𝕓𝕖𝕝𝕓𝕝𝕦𝕖 @rebelb1ue.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
You know what’s more dangerous than a trans athlete? 7 Frat boys at Cornell University.
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ebisback.bsky.social @ebisback.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Truth 💥
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
No, but we have Hawaiian shirt Friday and a semi-annual potluck. If you can afford iced coffee, we can't afford you.
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sooOOOOooosan @susandixon.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
...werewolves of London again
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Jamie Smart @jamiesmart.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Can’t eat a sandwich until you subscribe to sandwiches. Can’t eat today’s sandwich until it has applied daily sandwich updates. Sandwich now has adverts even though you paid for ad-free sandwich. Can pay again to have less sandwich adverts. Now you can eat the sandwich, but it’s smaller.
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TJ resists! Bluestormcoming! @tjjohnson.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
For those boycotting Tillamook Cheese and anything else that is “Halal,” I want you to know that fruit, vegetables, fish, air and water are also halal. ☪️😅.
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Matriarchy Now @matriarchy.now · 24/09/2026
Woman: "No."
1600s: Witch
1800s: Unladylike
1900s: Hysterical
1950s: Emotional
1970s: Frigid
1990s: Bitch
2010s: Bossy
2026: Difficult
MY VOICE MY CHOICE
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🦋MOM🦋 @momcjl.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
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KittyKatGirl😻🙏💞🐞 @mary1kathy.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
2nd time this week. Proof that the universe has a sense of humor.
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Robert Reich @rbreich.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Build child care centers. Build health centers. Build community centers. Not data centers. And not ICE detention centers.
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
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darren32359.bsky.social @darren32359.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
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Angry @angrystaffer.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Hurting the president’s feelings isn’t a national security threat Thank you for your attention to this matter.
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Bill Kristol @billkristolbulwark.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I found watching Trump’s UN speech today deeply depressing. It is a matter of national shame and humiliation that he is our president. Every country in the world, friend and foe alike, sees we are governed by a vainglorious fool.
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Robert Mahon @bedform.org · 22/09/2026
Banning press from the white house the same week you set up a state Dear Leader TV station is absolutely dictator shit
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Harry Turtledove @hntdove.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Venn you see the truth...
Venn diagram. Top circle, Canada Geese. Bottom left circle, Toddler. Bottom right circle, Anti-Vaxxer

Intersection Canada Geese/Toddler: always pooping
Intersection Canada Geese/Anti-Vaxxer: wants everydead
Intersection Toddler/Anti-Vaxxer: incoherent ramblings
Intersection of all 3: can't reason with them
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Where are Chachi and Kevin Sorbo when you need them?
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Emily @emilyyour8.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Belarus has a 25 year old deal to supply China with potash. 70% of Belarus' potash goes to the PRC Why would Belarus screw over a reliable customer with a quarter century history of paying its bills to sell potash to a dementia addled baby who might scuttle the deal at any moment cuz he's colicky?
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
I'm not sure how I was following @imbigslim.bsky.social either, but he is definitely a nasty bigot. Maybe a bot account that flipped. Blockity block blocked. Also not sure how I deleted my original post about him. 👀
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Do I detect, dare I say it, a hint of a spine in corporate media?
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Michael Warburton @michaelwarburton.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
This aired just the once in 1998 on the live SNL show for which McKay wrote it. It was effectively banned as it never aired again. I wonder why. MEDIA-OPOLY
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Michelle @michelleroy78.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
You never realize how little self-control you have until you’re eating chips and salsa at a Mexican restaurant.
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
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Eoin Higgins @eoinhiggins.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
You’re right—that plane shouldn’t have gone there. That’s my fault, and I should have made sure there wasn’t a terminal in the landing path. Would you like me to call emergency services, or assist with lining up takeoffs?
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The Shallow State @ourshallowstate.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
It's been three days since he said this, but I think it deserves an encore: “If we buy $2 billion worth of bananas from Brazil, we’re actually losing $2 billion. So if we stop eating bananas, we actually save $2 billion.” And this guy is in charge of the world's largest economy.
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Middle Age Riot @middleageriot.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Donald Trump: "I'm going to raise tariffs and start a war to make everything more expensive for no reason." MAGA: "I can't afford to support my family because Joe Biden made schoolchildren trans."
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ᑎᗩTᑌᖇᗩᒪ, ᒪIKE ᐯEᖇᑎOᑎ @naturallikevernon.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Trump died and got buried at Mar-Lago. A man went to the airport and said, "I need a ticket to go piss on Trump's grave." The agent said, "Yes, sir. Here's a ticket to Los Angeles." The guy said, "Los Angeles?! But Trump's buried in Florida!" The agent said, "Yes, sir, but the back of the line..."
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
The bar is in hell, yet somehow, they find a way to go lower. These grifting 3rd grade science failures are going to get us all killed.
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juhneenhow she/her @juhneenhowe.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
The fact all news organizations haven’t immediately left the White House in solidarity is all you need to know about these supposed journalists You can get the same exact info from his tweets and avoid the smell Win win really
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Hoodlum 🇺🇸 @nothoodlum.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
😂🔥😂
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Schrödinger’s Squirrel @scuffleuffagus.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Exactly. When his actions need to be reported on, "the Administration did x" or "the White House decided y". Never say his name.
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Emily @emilyyour8.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Leftist honey traps to humiliate ICE, huh? I mean, lol. Cuz ICE already wear 80 lbs of full on military tactical gear - all dressed up like they're invading Fallujah just to intimidate soccer moms in the suburbs. Ya ask me, those dudes arrives pre-humiliated.
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 18/09/2026
i am genuinely bewildered by people who say that the rise of white nationalism in the republican party is a response to the "woke left." like, did the woke left cause pat buchanan's 1992 presidential campaign? is the woke left why steve king had a long career in congress?
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