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Robert Ass Esq.

@robertassesq.bsky.social
470 followers 542 following 1.8K posts

Retired Judge - Sestak '24 - Metaverse Property Holder and Landlord - MCU - Superwholock

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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 18h
Oh thank god he said sike
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tinybaby @tiny.baby · 06/10/2026
hey. if you're reading this. take a second. relax your jaw. let your shoulders drop. fix your posture. now take your cock out and start stroking it for me
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Lets all agree to get rid of college sports forever
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spirit airlines presents: airplane fall @makeitsnow.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
because of the show’s meticulous world-building, many fans of justified don’t realize that the eastern district of kentucky is entirely fictional
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Innsmouth Looksmaxxing @gonebabygone.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

Sr. Producer/Editor – “Preditor” (Social Media/Short Form)
National Geographic

Washington, DC

$139,200 - $186,600 a yearTobias from Arrested Development
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Not that its actually funny but the funniest part of this is deshaun played like shit
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
president donald trup was sucked up into a tornado today while blasting down the freeway listening to cats on his way to promote his latest crypto venture at Hogfest. if you laugh at these facts the government can kidnap you, our nation is in mourning
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
very funny he'll probably go out because he wanted to be driven through a hurricane while falling asleep to a "Best of Pavarotti" playlist
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depths of wikipedia @depthsofwikipedia.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
we've located bussy
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Steve Berman @basportsguy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Based on that last possession, the NFL isn't all that happy with how the Rams treated the Australia trip like a preseason game.
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
is bo nix fucking r
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Drake Maybe She Changed Her Number
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Hi matt lafleur im your agent PLEASE keep throwing screens and short of the sticks
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
My car has gone rogue on the way home from day drinking and hit a telephone pole please give me 10000000000 dollars to fix this situation
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leon @leyawn.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
ceo of burger king: our burgers have gone rogue again and infected people with e coli
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Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I came up with some more inane bullshit for everyone to argue about!
(September 23, 2026 at 10:44am)
Fake opinions to argue over…
- Never turn left on a first date.
- Every kindergarten student should have an unpaid internship.
- The periodic table is too sexual.
- Bigfoot should be allowed to vote.
- Having a dream is the same as reading a book.
- You can wear a crop top to a funeral if the deceased person was hot when they died.
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terror @weedlejuice.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
My enemies are amassing on the outskirts of town. Probably to apologise for their grievous misconduct
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ironghazi @ironghazi.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Most people don't realize just how vast our great nation is. Truly amazing.
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James Hell Brooks @kleinman.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Taylor Lorenz is proof that Elon's ideological project at Twitter is working. Yeah, the lady who spends 18 hours a day online suddenly got more right wing after he took over, that was the point.
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Im the guy who has to check troop boners in the morning AMA
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the babahuck @tylerhuckabee.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
skipped a pretty key step in the movie review process here
the free press: Hold Your Applause for the New Gaza Documentary
There may yet be hard truths in 'NAZA,, including evidence of Israel's systemic failures. But the reporting around it treats flimsy claims as proof of criminality.I haven't seen the film. This means I cannot confidently assess its editing, corroboration, or the
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Sen. Pumpkin Gogurt @ugarles.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
you can criticize "chart for dinner" as a misrepresentation of the debate over the economy but criticizing trans voters for balking at democrats hedging on their rights is literally the civil rights version of "chart for dinner"
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Vikram Bath @vikrambath.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
There is absolutely zero reason my beautiful 17 year-old daughter should be studying Calculus
Happy to let our Al overlords take that off her hands

Next tweet:
PARENTS: If you were wondering why there are so many international students clogging up American college admissions and why they don't seem to be particularly gifted, and in fact are not at all qualified to steal your child's spot, look no further than the massive international
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Detroit saved(???) by the refs
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Justin Rogers | DFN @detroitfootball.net · 13/09/2026
No doubt well known to Saints fans, watching Juwan Johnson's unique pre-game routine is pretty awesome.
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
America is a blood thirsty cult
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Netflix really dumped this piece of shit on us and havent posted since
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
"why are the people we're bombing working together that isn't fair"
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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Monty Burns 

WE DID 20 TAKES, AND THAT WAS THE BEST ONE.
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ɢʀᴇᴇɴʜᴏʀɴ ꜰᴏᴏᴛᴘᴀᴅ @colourmode.bsky.social · 08/08/2025
let me call you back boss I’m with a custoid right now [hangs up] i’ve been dreaming of ways to serve you.
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Slenderman
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
“Drink-it-all-up” Okay calm down
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
The iPhone Go Fuck Yourself: eat up piggies oink oink
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Podcast for and by racist middle schoolers
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
not only does heather mac donald look busted as hell but also i dont give a shit
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
this is going to be treated as less offensive than mamdani daring to be muslim 25 years after 9/11
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
a racially serious dinosaur movie starring mathhew mcconaughey
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Luke O'Neil @lukeoneil47.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Poor people know something is being kept from them: adequate medical care. Kind of rich people imagine something is being kept from them: roadkill dog cum elixir.
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sardaukar_burger_chant.flac @manateemindset.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Elite youtube recommendations page
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gabbs @girlboss.capital · 06/09/2026
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
I saw ben ryan making out with ronald mcdonald
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Andrew Lawrence @ndrew.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
a nazi pedophile that loves data centers is fully funding the republican partys midterm efforts
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rev. howard arson @theophite.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
the more interesting thing about this article, which was written by a lobbyist for Google, Amazon, and Meta, among others, is that it was written by a lobbyist for Google, Amazon, and Meta, among others.
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Jaws (1975) @jaws-1975.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
It was a shark.
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krat @kwholesaler.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
(Watching the ocean of Solaris resolve itself into a formation in the unmistakable likeness of Peter Griffin) Holy crap
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Bad day to be a dumb idiot
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Robert Ass Esq. @robertassesq.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
PA Residents please message Fetterman and let him know you think he's a loser!
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Adam Ellis @adamtots.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
😦
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Bradford Pearson @bradfordpearson.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
This is such a massive blow for Philadelphia. You could tell the museum was struggling in recent years, and it's a shame they couldn't figure out how to fix it.
inquirer.com
The Academy of Natural Sciences is closing its museum after nearly two centuries
The closure does not affect the rest of the institution, which builds and maintains the collections and conducts research through departments such as the Patrick Center for Environmental Research.
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