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Hole Man

@holeman85.bsky.social
35 followers 25 following 256 posts

I am a man. Also, a hole.

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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 19/05/2025
Popes pick lame names. I’d go with Pope Beavis or Pope Butthead. Would you rather the third Leo or the first Butthead?
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 15/03/2025
Breaking news: JD Vance got pegged by a couch
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 23/02/2025
It’s such a bummer for capitalism that the world’s richest man is obviously an idiot.
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RickyFTW @rickyftw.bsky.social · 11/02/2025
I need him and Gritty to meet
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Nathan Bulmer @natemorebikes.bsky.social · 05/02/2025
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Bill Corbett @billcorbett.bsky.social · 29/01/2025
When the questions are getting rough and you're starting to feel that roadkill skunk you snacked on before the hearing
Bobby Kennedy Jr looking like shit in his hearing today
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 29/01/2025
It’s crazy that AI turned out to be a scam. It’s not like tech-bro investors have been pushing nothing but scams for decades…
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Nathan Bulmer @natemorebikes.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
At this point, they should probably give up on adding the “gamble responsibly/seek help” message on every sports betting commercial. We all know it’s not helping
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 25/01/2025
Not to brag or anything, but I haven’t seen any of the best picture nominees. I’m not a hero or anything, I’m just a cool guy.
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ⓘ 𝕆ligarch f*ckery detected @adelpreore.bsky.social · 24/01/2025
I knew it!
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 24/01/2025
They should remake the Social Network, but from a 2025 perspective. Mark Zuvkerberg isn’t some “techno punk anarchist genius,” but just some rich kid who hates privacy and is a weird little freak. Trent Reznor still does the score.
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Jake_Vig @jakevig.bsky.social · 23/01/2025
My daughter lost her first tooth and put it under her pillow. I replaced it with an even bigger tooth. She wants to play tooth games? Let's dance.
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Jeffrey Rowland @wigu.org · 23/01/2025
Got up in the middle of the night to go the bathroom. Turned on the light and sat down and looked at the floor. Dog poops on the floor, four or five of them in a chaotic pattern. How did I miss stepping on them? The Lord guided my feet around the dog poops, obviously. Anyway I'm a The Lord guy now.
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 22/01/2025
I just invested my life savings in $shiftycoin, a new crypto created by Shifty Pete, the local con artist. I got a good feeling about this one! Have fun staying poor, losers
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Randall Munroe @xkcd.com · 18/01/2025
Human Altitude xkcd.com/3039
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 16/01/2025
Everyone praising Nosferatu should watch a true classic. I’m not joking. This is a better movie in every way.
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Molly Jong-Fast @mollyjongfast.bsky.social · 15/01/2025
Oh man
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 14/01/2025
Don’t ever give up on your dreams… until you hit 30. You basically have a ten year window to get things going. After that, give up on your dreams. It feels fantastic.
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 14/01/2025
The best way to fix society is for us to all get together and steal Mark Zuckerberg’s lunch money.
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 12/01/2025
Pitch for a network TV show: Doctor Cop He’s a doctor and a cop. He has to solve medical mysteries while also also solving crime mysteries. The twist? He’s terrible at both jobs.
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 11/01/2025
YouTube keeps recommending clips from Suits to me, but each clip is titled something like “genius lawyer tricks crooked judge” or something like that, implying the footage is of real events. And then it’s always the Suits lawyer pulling some basic law shit that’s either illegal or basic.
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Kevin Parry @kevinbparry.bsky.social · 10/01/2025
Chair Stop-Motion 🪑💨 Made with 444 pictures taken over 10 days
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 09/01/2025
Classic Sluggo
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 09/01/2025
It is such a bummer for the pro-capitalism weirdos out there that the richest man in the world is kind of dumb
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 05/01/2025
My niece asked me to put on Cars 2, which she said was her favorite movie. Five minutes in, she asked me “why are the cars talking?” I was like, “are you serious, that’s like the whole concept of the movie” She had never seen it before. I don’t know why she lied to me about this, but I respect it.
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Kristi Yamaguccimane @wapplehouse.bsky.social · 05/01/2025
Not paying for a knob, not 3D printing a knob, but a secret third thing
I'm so glad I learned CAD
@thmsmr• 1d
$34/knob from Bosch
$0.12/knob from my 3D printer

when i needed one for my maytag range i simply went to home depot and took a knob off the display model and put in my pocket
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 04/01/2025
Liz Cheney is not a hero. She’s just a monster who hates another monster. Cheney and Trump both suck, don’t make either of them out to be heroes
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 01/01/2025
Spent NYE watching Wicked, eating Red Lobster, and then sitting with my dog so she wasn’t scare of fireworks. Pretty solid night.
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 28/12/2024
Nosferatu is the only movie I saw in 2024 where somebody hangs dong. This means that Nosferatu’s dong is THE dong of 2024.
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 26/12/2024
Two kids are trapped in a darkened hjouse with no windows. One says "damn bro, looks like we got skinamarkinked." The other brother asks "how are we gonna get out of this one?" Suddenly the Kook Aid man bursts through a wall and says "OH YEAH!!!" He extends his hand and says "come with me if you want to live." The brothers seem delighted.
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matt be @mattbe.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
If only they’d thought to put trampolines at the bottom of wells, so many tragedies would now be hilarious anecdotes.
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
Scrooge was like “fuck Christmas” and then a ghost was like “hey, look at this sick kid” and Scrooge was like “hell yeah, Christmas rules”
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
Hey, maybe instead of planning the ultimate Christmas decoration scheme, Biden could’ve focused on not screwing over the 2024 election? Sure, the trees look nice… but, you know…
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 24/12/2024
Just to be clear, the vast majority of Marvel What If episodes result in Thanos snapping all life out of existence. That’s kind of a big deal
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Kris Wilson @kriswilson.bsky.social · 24/12/2024
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VanDammit @chaosagent42.bsky.social · 22/12/2024
BREAKING: Using careful measurements and controlled environments, scientists have concluded that a loud fart in a mall during Christmas Eve shopping is not as embarrassing as owning a #CyberTruck
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 21/12/2024
Everyone keeps talking about Christmas movies, but there are some great New Years movies. For example, End of Days is a movie about Arnold Schwarzenegger trying to keep the devil from getting laid on NYE
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 18/12/2024
Look at these perverts getting boners for stars, it’s disgusting
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 17/12/2024
If you’re 50 or older and worth millions of dollars, and you don’t retire, then you’re a psychopath.
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The Life of Sharks @thelifeofsharks.com · 17/12/2024
Bond Villain Sharks.
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 17/12/2024
Just watched Venom: The Last Dance and it’s a perfect example of why you need to give characters motivation. None of the primary characters in that movie have any goals, they’re just doing stuff and then monsters show up.
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The Weekly Planet @theweeklyplanet.bsky.social · 16/12/2024
How Chris Evans will return to MCU?
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Amii Illustrates @amiiillustrates.bsky.social · 15/12/2024
Funny comic strip. Two people sat at a table, one says “what do you bring to the table?”. The other lifts their stomach onto the table. Illustration drawn in simplistic cartoon line art style. By Amii Illustrates.
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 15/12/2024
I’ve literally seen more people complaining about people saying Die Hard is a Christmas movie than I’ve ever seen people saying that it’s a Christmas movie…
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 14/12/2024
Jingle Bells - classic song, no notes Jingle Bell Rock - does not rock, feels like an old man trying to pander to teens in the ‘50s. I’m a classic Jingle Bells man. There is no debate.
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Eliot @eliotetc.bsky.social · 14/12/2024
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Hole Man @holeman85.bsky.social · 13/12/2024
Just tried listening to Mark Cuban on Jon Stewart’s podcast and I almost threw my phone at the TV. He’s literally just shilling for crypto the entire time, a thing that is, without a doubt, a bad idea that has no real utility and has cost regular people millions of dollars.
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