iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Reposted by @aburtonmatt.bsky.social

If you're in these 3 states, *TODAY* is deadline to register to vote. Alaska Rhode Island South Carolina Even if you think you've registered: doesn't hurt to check everything is in order. Do it now. And there's a lot to vote for across them. A thread with stakes on each. ⬇️

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I’m sorry… why did no one tell me, the parent of a toddler, that fucking Brian Blessed is in Peppa Pig

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oblivion.txt @oblivion-txt.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

I hope things get better.

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

95% sure that Trump’s Osprey air escort circling NY Harbor is keeping my kid awake right now, as if I needed one more reason to think ill of this guy

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

If this is legal then we have no law. If this is permissible then everything is permitted.

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

Remember at the beginning of the Iran war when Hegseth was like “we’re done with WOKE WARS. ok???? We’re done with the geneva CUCKventions. We’re doing only warfighter warrior wars now” and then they got absolutely wrecked over and over and over again

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Mark Jacob @markjacob.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

I feel like I’m living In a dystopian novel written in 1993 that was rejected by dozens of publishers because it was incredibly stupid.

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

The five Simpsons lines I’ve uttered most: 5) “she needs premium dude!!!! Premium!!!” 4) “mmm… gummy venus” 3) “I’ll get you for this, Midlerrrr!!!” (Explodes) 2) Skinner in steamed hams: “…. No.” 1) all of Goulet’s lines but especially “Ohh! I’m sorry kid!” after clocking milhouse with a mic

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furby hancock @furbyhancock.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

Cannot CHECK PHONE in combat. Cannot CHECK PHONE in combat. Cannot CHECK PHONE in combat. Cannot CHECK PHONE in combat. Cannot CHECK PHONE in combat. You were killed by DARK WIZARD!

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pixelatedboat aka “mr bluesky” @pixelatedboat.bsky.social · 17/07/2026

I enjoyed The Odyssey (2026) but I have one historical nitpick. The phrase “Jiminy Christmas” is a minced oath for “Jesus Christ”. As the story is set around 1200 B.C. it is unlikely that Odysseus would have said the phrase even once, let alone the dozens of times he says it in the film

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 09/07/2026

Are we sure it isn’t Jared Earsaacman

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

BREAKING: Mitch McConnell has descended into the In-Between and is meeting with Berath, God of Death. His soul will soon either be cast back onto the Wheel or he will agree to return to Eora as Herald of Berath after character creation and importing his choices from the first Trump administration

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

Horrifying, and any news outlet that fails to mention his obviously virulent racism whenever he comes up should have to close up shop imo

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

Somehow the beams are also covered in algae

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Jon Bois @jonbois.bsky.social · 21/06/2026

tired of the "#1 dad" nonsense. if you're a dad, stop treating it like a joke and post your actual national dad ranking. i'm # 492,018, which is actually really high up there, but more importantly it lets me enter ranked dad lobbies where i can get matched up for fistfights with dads of my caliber

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Jack Mirkinson @jackmirkinson.bsky.social · 12/06/2026

an obscenity. we live in monstrous times

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Topher Florence @topherflorence.bsky.social · 31/05/2026

"a goofy movie": a humble title. why it's not even necessarily "the" goofy movie. we simply, respectfully offer you this story for your consideration "doug's 1st movie": the hubris of icarus. the unbridled audacity to imply that this is only the 1st chapter of the Doug Cinematic Universe. pathetic

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 28/05/2026

Walking through a big NYC park on Eid today, with tons of celebrating families grilling, everybody happy, kids playing with their parents, I am struck by how obviously wholesome it is. It stuns me a bit to recall the many people in power today who would eagerly vilify these folks for power or profit

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 18/05/2026

Note to democrats: “he has been robbing you blind, every single day” is a kitchen table issue

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 08/05/2026

Next time reactionaries deploy an overt, half-century-long plan to fundamentally corrupt our judiciary we might wanna, I dunno, try to stop them

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Adventurism Time @flow.blacksky.app · 06/05/2026

Can't fix racist maps because the election is only a year away, but you can stop an election after voting starts to make the maps more racist. Good thing racism is over. 🤬

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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 23/04/2026

it is important to emphasize that this was *the point*. this was *intentional*. elon musk is a vicious white supremacist who thinks poor african children ought to die, so that the world can be whiter

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 21/04/2026

Woof. Worse and worse from him. Guy had promise once, but this really ain’t it

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dido, lamenting 🥀🔥💀🪦💔 @princessdido.bsky.social · 13/04/2026

Forget microplastics, I'm having a hard time keeping my toddler from eating macroplastics

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The Onion @theonion.com · 24/03/2026

“I AM PLEASED TO REPORT THAT OVER THE LAST TWO DAYS AN ANGEL HAS VISITED ME IN MY SLEEP AND I HAVE HAD VERY GOOD AND PRODUCTIVE SEX WITH IT,” read the lengthy, all-caps post

theonion.com

Markets Surge After Trump Claims He Had Sex With An Angel

NEW YORK—In what came as a welcome shock to investors amid recent dips in the global economy, markets reportedly surged Tuesday after President Donald Trump wrote in a Truth Social Post that he’d had ...

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Lupita Nihongo @otsumamiboy.blacksky.app · 19/03/2026

John Fetterman’s face & dome looks like what you’d see if you ripped that black mask off of a medieval executioner

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 14/03/2026

No, Mr. Bond. (Bold text) I expect you to die. (End bold text.) Let’s walk through what will happen when this laser hits your junk. - Loss of genital function — cancel any dates you’ve got, James. 😢 - Death — mentioned this one above, so you know it’s coming already, but just another heads up. ✅

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Michael @fleerultra.bsky.social · 10/03/2026

most of my anger towards dems is they repeatedly invoke this trope and then do not govern, either in majority or minority, as if it was true. whereas i actually often do believe it and believe the responsibility to act like it’s true extends past the first week of november

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Disco Elysium Quotes @discoelysiumbot.bsky.social · 10/03/2026

No. This is somewhere to be. This is all you have, but it's still something. Streets and sodium lights. The sky, the world. You're still alive.

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andy™ @andylevy.net · 01/03/2026

“direct your anger at trump not the democrats” buddy you are severely underestimating the amount of anger i have available to me

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 28/02/2026

The briefings! Won’t somebody please think of the briefings??

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Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 28/02/2026

Today’s military strikes on Iran — carried out by the United States and Israel — mark a catastrophic escalation in an illegal war of aggression. Bombing cities. Killing civilians. Opening a new theater of war.

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NPR @npr.org · 24/02/2026

An NPR investigation finds the public database of Epstein files is missing dozens of pages related to sexual abuse accusations against President Trump. n.pr/4qTItsU

n.pr

Justice Department withheld and removed some Epstein files related to Trump

An NPR investigation finds the public database of Epstein files is missing dozens of pages related to sexual abuse accusations against President Trump.

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𝔻𝕒𝕟 🏈🍻💀 @danmynrd.bsky.social · 20/02/2026

im still of the mind that trump isnt gay, but a type of flamboyance allowed to hetero reactionaries that only existed in 70/80s new york

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 11/02/2026

Just saw “fuck ICE” written in what I assume is urine in the snow in an NYC park, with pretty excellent pen(is)manship

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aburtonmatt.bsky.social @aburtonmatt.bsky.social · 09/02/2026

Never heard literally any of his songs and that stunned me and brought tears to my eyes

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#1 Lifelong Houston Cougs Fan Brandi 😾 @itsthebrandi.bsky.social · 06/02/2026

JD Vance looks like yassified Chucky

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shaunt @shaunvids.bsky.social · 02/02/2026

like at a certain point it is easier to just run a candidate with popular policies than a dogshit one with awful policies who you have to somehow scold people into pretending is good. far too much work, that

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more mr. spice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 30/01/2026

ELON MUSK: your island is so freaking like, based. it's seriously like effing amazeballs. i'm going to basically be making like all of mars totally just like the same as how epic this is STEPHEN HAWKING: jeff rey why, did you in vite, this lame, ass nerd

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The Onion @theonion.com · 26/01/2026

Kristi Noem Calls On Minneapolis Residents To Stop Obstructing Murders theonion.com/kristi-noem-calls-on-m…

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Ana Marie Cox @anamariecox.com · 20/01/2026

In addition to being bad, this is all pretty stupid.

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leon @leyawn.bsky.social · 08/01/2026

this is your mission. roll up to this daycare in full tactical gear to harass some kids and teachers. when you get spooked by your own shadow like a panicked horse and start shooting your gun, our pedophile president will call the person you shot a terrorist. good luck soldier

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Max Kennerly @maxkennerly.bsky.social · 04/01/2026

1) Venezuela has a government. 2) This is being thrown together at the last minute by people who—amazing as it sounds—are even less intelligent, qualified, and competent than the GWBush-era dunces who tried to make imperialism happen in Iraq & Afghanistan and failed miserably. What could go wrong?

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