Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 24/09/2026Fart away, they remain undetectable amidst my personal miasma 021
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 24/09/2026at the end of the day we are all just mozzarella sticks: breaded, overheated, and one bad pull away from complete structural failure 55617
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 23/09/2026It should at least admit to everyone in the meeting that some jerkoff is messaging you. 111
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 23/09/2026The fact that Teams shows when you're "in a meeting" but still lets people message you anyway is psychological terrorism 1323
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 21/09/2026You will never catch me paying $14 for a Decorative miniature gourd. I will steal it from the exterior landscaping of a panera bread as God intended 2477
Reposted by Inspector RatchetGabrielle @gabbklein.myatproto.social · 19/09/2026Actual exchange in a work meeting this morning: My boss: "That TV monitor needs to get replaced. It was installed in 2007" My coworker: "oh wow, just 3 years after I was born!" Then I cackled and hobbled away to take my teeth out 0111
Reposted by Inspector RatchetThundergasm Angrypants: Clint Howard Appreciator @therealdcf.bsky.social · 19/09/2026[Repositioning my hemorrhoid donut] But what a ride! 051
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 19/09/2026[knocks back 2 baby aspirin] They were hard, kid. Hard. 151
Reposted by Inspector RatchetBraden Serkas @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 18/09/2026Loud and dirty and dangerous and untethered and wonderful. Go back to your rectangle of sadness, child 081
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 18/09/2026Watching a kid in my office consume 600mg of caffeine via an electric blue can while I measure out my daily antacid powder into lukewarm sink water. He asks me what the 90s were like. they were loud, you insolent whelp 549779
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 14/09/2026My body is asking for vegetables in the same tone a hostage negotiator asks for proof of life 19529
Reposted by Inspector Ratchethaden reynolds (Robert) @hadenreynolds.bsky.social · 04/09/2026labor is a latin word meaning 'do not wear white' 041
Reposted by Inspector RatchetPAM! @pamtoo.bsky.social · 04/09/2026Labor. From the Latin laborum, meaning no mail. 031
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 04/09/2026It’s Bigfoot. File tax exemptions appropriately. 021
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 04/09/2026Every year I am forced to confront the mystery of "labor day." no one will tell me what it means. all i know is the banks are closed and i am not allowed to mail my famous envelopes 3345
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 02/09/2026Wolves of I-95static.klipy.comThe Wolf of Wall Street - IllegalALT: The Wolf of Wall Street - Illegal 011
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 02/09/2026Oh is that a STUDENT DRIVER sticker? How about I rear end you and teach you about real life. Welcome to Interstate 95, kid. your next lesson is insurance fraud 214936
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 29/08/2026Eating some horsemeat pigeon tacos (I live in the United States) 714621
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 14/08/2026My brain shuts down after 2 pm on Fridays. After that, you're talking to a screensaver 528141
Reposted by Inspector RatchetΞLΞGΔNT RΞCΞPTΔCLΞ @cameronpaton.bsky.social · 30/07/2026Time keeps on tickin, ticken, ticken into the g6 021
Reposted by Inspector RatchetPickled Eggs @pickle-egg.bsky.social · 30/07/2026Fly like a g6 Let Spirit Air carry me 122
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 30/07/2026Yes. iSO/IEC Guide 2:2004 021
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 29/07/2026My dad thought "rizz" was short for risotto 1321838
Reposted by Inspector Ratchetb3lt3r @b3lt3r.bsky.social · 27/03/2026They don't like your Triffids? Heathens the lot of them. Move a couple by the porch and let the HOA come and complain. 042
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 26/03/2026The flowers are blooming and so am I. I am becoming something unspeakable. The HOA has already called twice 38821
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 26/03/2026Right? Doesn’t matter if it’s Pokopia telling me to see the sun or my boss telling me to see HR. Have a little bit of the B – lock, chuckle buns. 131
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 26/03/2026Pokopia devs emailed me “please see the sun.” blocked 1132
Reposted by Inspector Ratchetanonnine.bsky.social @anonnine.bsky.social · 05/03/2026You know what we need more women cult leaders 052
Reposted by Inspector RatchetJason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 04/03/2026Love reading Frankenstein in public so I can occasionally say, “I guess we see who the real monster is.” 323858
Reposted by Inspector RatchetElder Michael @mldunigan.bsky.social · 04/03/2026I'm going full Christian rat mode. I'll meet you in the catacombs. 011
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 04/03/2026If ww3 goes nuclear, I'm going full Joker mode and starting a cult in the sewers 108518
Reposted by Inspector RatchetOrni @ornithologistgames.bsky.social · 02/03/2026For those of you without a car, and acceptable alternative is an energy drink on the bus, and a cry in the office supply closet or freezer. 052
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 02/03/2026We are very fast at burgers, don’t even try us, Prussia. 021
Reposted by Inspector Ratchet- just brady @justbrady.bsky.social · 02/03/2026I would like to substitute a whole rotisserie chicken for that burger please 1101
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 02/03/2026In America, the phrase "work-life balance" refers to how fast you can eat a burger while crying in your car 524463
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 27/02/2026US Treasurymedia.tenor.coma group of police officers are running down some stairsALT: a group of police officers are running down some stairs 011
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 27/02/2026I put "emotional support vape" as a business expense and turbo tax crashed my wifi 16314
Reposted by Inspector Ratchethaden reynolds (Robert) @hadenreynolds.bsky.social · 22/02/2026Activate the Strategic Capri Sun Reserve 011
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 21/02/2026every time I eat soup I unlock a new area of my brain previously reserved for ancient knowledge 05214
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 21/02/2026“get to know me” but you have to solve a series of riddles and also i’m hiding under a weighted blanket 15011
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 21/12/2025my brain is running on Windows 95 and someone just clicked solitaire 38019
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 03/12/2025“let’s circle back in the new year :)” buddy I’ll be a different person by january. I might legally become a lizard 04612
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 29/11/2025grocery stores immediately switched the music to “jingle bell rock.” i still have gravy stains on my shoes, please have mercy 210421
Reposted by Inspector Ratchetedeath @edithcharles.bsky.social · 23/12/2023You there boy! What discourse is it? 201627318
Inspector Ratchet @1nspectratchet.bsky.social · 28/11/2025Home Alone is just SAW for kids. puzzles. traps. screaming grown men 312426
Reposted by Inspector RatchetFulkery Monkery @fulkery.bsky.social · 27/11/2025[lowers tongs, sniffles] 031
