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Tragic Johnson

@tragicjohnson.bsky.social
165 followers 229 following 1K posts
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Reposted by Tragic Johnson
John Muller @johnspacemuller.com · 29/09/2026
How can we get Nathan Fielder into a rental home with Man City execs for the next 34 days
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Jon Tayler (Jon Tayler’s Version) @jontayler.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Max Scherzer’s kids run from the dugout to the mound to take him out of the game then run back screaming and crying after he tells them he’s not fucking going anywhere, get the fuck off my mound
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Luckily they’ve learned their lesson from the RGIII experience
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Michael Emonds @michaelje67.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Send this to every Man City fan you know. #115
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A.A. Dowd @aadowd.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
It's very silly to complain about someone else's entirely subjective best-of list, with the exception of when I complain that there are definitely not 96 shows this century better than CONMUNITY.
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Watching bad things happen to the New York Giants feels something like it must have to be a normie when the gods were striking down Sisyphus or Tantalus or whoeverp
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
I kinda hate this guy on pretty much all but one issue
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
If Chelsea can avoid conceding for the rest of the season they’ll match the record set by Mourinho’s 2004-2005 squad for fewest goals in a single season (15)
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Reacher and the Buffalo Bills have pretty much the same premise at this point
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Cullen @hellocullen.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
the wet bandits trying to rob a house
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
If you lived in Canada in the 90s every broadcast mention of Detriot Lions corner Rock Ya-Sin sure sounds like “Roch Voisine”
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Napoleon ranking suggests the system need to be reweighted to account for making any of the classic blunders, like marching on Moscow
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The Onion @theonion.com · 12/09/2026
Critically Acclaimed ‘Ted Lasso’ Episode Just Stock Photos Of People Hugging Each Other theonion.com/critically-acclaimed-t…
Critically Acclaimed ‘Ted Lasso’ Episode Just Stock Photos Of People Hugging Each Other
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Love that he claps how he talks
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Renting a cottage and these strange birds have been Weezering outside the window since we arrived
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Popcornbender Spatch @spatch.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
"Everybody knows Ebenezer Scrooge was in the wrong. But what this movie presupposes is: what if he wasn't?"
Owen Wilson as Eli Cash in the Royal Tenenbaums, having a library walk-and-talk-and-presuppose with a bunch of literary fans.
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Wow, Leo Messi retires to Falkland Islands
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
I would have liked for Liverpool to have kept Mo Salah and sold Cody Gakpo for £80 million
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
I am not Cody Gakpo’s biggest fan, but Liverpool’s commitment to having exactly 11 players remains baffling
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ArtButMakeItSports @artbutmakeitsports.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
The Garden of Earthly Delights (detail), by Hieronymus Bosch, 1480-1505
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
“Jim Beglin” is what JK Rowling would call a hobo wizard that carries his things over his shoulder in a handkerchief tied to his wand
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
What is the point of having the spreadsheet dorks if you’re just going to buy the most expensive player on the market at the end of each summer?
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
I think it would be reasonable to ask for hotels, for the price we pay for them these days, to have chargers on both sides of the bed
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Linked In posts as reporting
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
The only two things I know about this year’s Hull City side are that today they beat United and yesterday this was their season preview
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Liverpool have set up their new manager to fail for no reason but inertia A mom asked you to take out chicken and oh shit it’s 5 pm and you forgot but maybe you can defrost it in the microwave?-ass summer
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
When was the last time Coventry was barraged like this?
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Bluesky hitting a havin the juice low point today
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The Onion @theonion.com · 20/08/2026
Golfer Resigns From Club After Faking Hole-In-One theonion.com/golfer-resigns-from-cl…

“A country club is no place for a status-seeking phony.”

Pete Hyslop, Pan Scraper
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Bloody Popcorn @bloodypopcorn.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Happy Wet Hot American Texas Chain Saw Massacre Summer Day to all who celebrate!
Two images split horizontally in the middle featuring date cards with lettering over black backgrounds for films Wet Hot American Summer and Texas Chain Saw Madsacre. The filter reads “August 18, 1981, 5:57 am, Last Day of camp.” And the latter reads “August 18, 1973”Two images split horizontally. The top is from Wet Hot American Summer and shows three men in mid-dance positions. The bottom shows classic horror icon Leatherface wielding a chainsaw.
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fighting naturalist @stelliferant.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
in case you're wondering how they'll weaponize your desire to not be annexed
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The Onion @theonion.com · 14/08/2026
No One Translated To Foreign Players Why They Currently In Cornfield
No One Translated To Foreign Players Why They Currently In Cornfield
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
Just watched the episode of New Girl where Alan Ritchson plays a douchey street artist with a micropenis and it’s hard to transition directly to Reacher
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
I just watched Bring It On for the first time and I cannot believe that this movie had cultural cachet
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Player loans have literally never worked out for Liverpool in the past, but surely this just means they’re due?
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
The two things that make me feel oldest is that as a kid we had a rotary telephone (that we rented from the phone company) and I also grew up playing in pads like this. I am a millennial. Things move fast.
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Whoever is holding the means of production at any given time is the Communist It’s like a great big game of king of the hill
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
One gets the sense that Kawhi Leonard does not have the best advisors
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Rico Charges @nochorus.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
bsky.app/profile/plea...
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
The use of “pied-à-terre” to describe the properties being taxed is incredible political branding. It is impossible not to sound like an asshole for having one.
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
Not Shopping With The Poors is a pillar of middle class identity and its persistence in a time of $15 chicken breasts is quietly one of the wildest things about society
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The Onion @theonion.com · 05/08/2026
New ‘Ted Lasso’ Season Aims To Teach Viewers About Shapes, Colors theonion.com/new-ted-lasso-season-a…
New ‘Ted Lasso’ Season Aims To Teach Viewers About Shapes, Colors
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
The whole world outside of Canada reading this one without a double take
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Not a transfer market enthusiast, but this is the first offseason in a very long time where you look at Liverpool and think “definitely not our year”
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The Beaverton @thebeaverton.com · 03/08/2026
Canadians overwhelmingly demand wealth tax after Kevin O’Leary says it will make him move away
thebeaverton.com
Canadians overwhelmingly demand wealth tax after Kevin O’Leary says it will make him move away
OTTAWA - Pollsters report a split among Canadians over the idea of higher tax on the assets of wealthy individuals, though support skyrockets after noting that Kevin O'Leary has vowed that he will res...
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The Onion @theonion.com · 02/08/2026
Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise Face Off Alone On ‘Celebrity Family Feud’
theonion.com
Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise Face Off Alone On ‘Celebrity Family Feud’
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
UEFA and FIFA, pictured.
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
I like reading film and television criticism. It is enlightening to see things from other people’s perspectives, learn about things that I may have missed, revel in shared enjoyment, etc. The Odyssey discourse has gone so far past that and is just a fucking drag. Move on. God damn.
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Tragic Johnson @tragicjohnson.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
Raggedy ass dreams for a club of Newcastle’s size and current wealth
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