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Watched a video about the fitness of elite footballers and it's insane, similar to tennis players and top cyclists. It makes all the videos of journalists in their 40s going for a jog round the Azteca and saying "got a headache" even more stupid.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 9h

Projection, apology accepted

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 14h

And yet they always just...side with rightwing shit but with a sad face.

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flyingrodent @flyingrodent.bsky.social · 14h

Even now, David Cameron is admonishing the IDF for war crimes. Nothing further, but he could do it without a campaign of all-channels hatred.

Cameron Condemns Israel
Rocket Attack
The PM calls the launch of 50 missiles into
Israel from Gaza during his visit to the country as "barbaric" and "indiscriminate".
By Anushka Asthana, Political Correspondent
• Wednesday 12 March 2014 10:11, UK

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flyingrodent @flyingrodent.bsky.social · 15h

Go back 20 years: Tony Blair is fighting the battle that will end his leadership and get him ousted, insisting that the 2006 Lebanon war is a principled battle for freedom - US crank Condoleeza Rice says it’s “the birth pangs of a new Middle East”. The UN ceasefire vote looks like this.

All the world voting for a ceasefire; the UK, the US and Israel voting against

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ceej @ceej.online · 17h

waymos are driven by the ghosts of people who died in debt

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flyingrodent @flyingrodent.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Massie with the shocking news here that Palestinians have been importing the Israel/Palestine conflict to Britain, and that Palestinians are targeting Israelis on the streets of Britain.

alexmassie • @alexmassie
X.com
A classic example of how playing the 'both sides' card is a means of avoiding, or even denying, obvious truths.
"We can never allow conflict overseas to divide us at home", Khan says.
But only one side imports the conflict here.
Only one side targets the other on British streets every week.
The two sides are not, in fact, the same. x.com/ mayoroflondon/...
Mayor of London, Sadiq Khan
Ma... • 10h
My statement on the third anniversary of the October 7 attacks.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

When I was doing a play in Birmingham in 2024 there was a barge on the canal that would show up in different parts of the city selling homemade fudge called Fudge Boat. We just looked up Fudge Boat and the Facebook account is VERY reactionary rightwing. Fudge Boat just had its Milkshake Duck moment.

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Skip, the Online New Yorker (terrifying, i know) @badposter.lol · 07/10/2026

more business owners need to be like this

Coldstuff Ice-cream • Follow

I swear to God. STOP YELLING AT MY FUCKING EMPLOYEES. They are children. This job, for most of them is their first. They are going to make mistakes. They aren't in charge of anything. This can all be fixed with a smile and a polite attitude. It's ice cream for crying out loud. Grow up and act your age.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

It isn't. It's going to be an absolute smash hit and we need to be ready for the nausea.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Nobody has any money! It's rarely to do with the talent of the performer. In fact, it never is.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Full disclosj, London's selling well but a lot of the tour's been pulled so if you want to go and can afford it I recommend booking now so I don't have to have difficult discussions a few weeks before the tour date. Show's funny, at one point I Yassify Phil Mitchell. www.soozkempner.co.uk/tour-2026

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Worried that Trump is gearing up for an October surprise and it's going to be him doing Hyrox live on TV and spraying diarrhoea everywhere.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Well now it's in four weeks! Already more than half the tickets are sold, really hope to see you there. November 4th @ Pleasance Islington

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Yeah I'd gone foetal until I spoke to my agent and she said "oh it's EVERYONE". Miss you, Twitter x

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

I like all the people in the comments going "WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE EGGS!??!??!?!?" coz they think a poached egg should look like a hockey puck

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Final Friztination @frizfrizzle.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

[Man orders Beans on Toast with poached eggs]: "the fuck is this shit???"

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Rachel Parris @rachelparris.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Hey folks. In total honesty my tour is NOT selling well. I’ve sold 30 tickets in a 400 seater in Birmingham, and not much more elsewhere. If you like musical comedy, if you like standup, then please come see my show! And spread the word! The Rachel Parris Songbook tour starts in Nov! Link in bio! 🎶

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Well, we fucking DON'T, so there's that.

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I Liv, I Die, Oliviagain Hill @machineiv.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

You ever hear about how Dianetics has remained a bestseller for 75 years? Yeah.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

scoobydooneitherleftnorright.jpg

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Tyler, from the Internet (Haunted) @tylerfromtheinternet.com · 07/10/2026

even before they knew or could have known what a monster Rowling was, people were way to fuckin into harry potter

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

did you mean to reply to me?

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VOID VOID VOID @burnyourbones.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Labour were running a van round my constituency on by-election day telling voters the Greens were going to sell all our children into sex work for drugs

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

So you agree then, that the UK sending arms to Israel has been abhorrent.

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Sam “The Great Pumpkin” Thielman @samthielman.com · 07/10/2026

oh look paid protesters

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Oh that's such a fucking shame!

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The Scales ⚖️ @shakethescales.bsky.social · 12/05/2022

A thread: Why socialist Labour was stopped... ‘We will launch the biggest ever crackdown on tax avoidance and evasion and reform the inefficient system of tax reliefs.’ – Labour Manifesto, 2019. #CouldHaveHad & #WhyWeWereStopped

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Why did he block you!??!?!

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Didn't he put over $20m in to the Wisconsin attorney general election and his candidate lost?

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Oh I agree and that wasn't what I was referring to. But I'd advise you to maybe learn one thing about me before you start giving us your tight five. Apology accepted x

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

who do you think you're talking to rn, anonymo?

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

The thing is...they don't! They've been delighted at Andy Burnham announcing (some) sanctions (only on the illegal settlements, but, ya know, a start) just as they were delighted with Starmer refusing to move an inch on his support for Israel. If their centrist king is doing it it MUST be good!

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Mic Wright @brokenbottleboy.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

“We are the no nonsense party,” says Badenoch, a woman who has never met an online bandwagon she wouldn’t immediately jump on.

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Pete Marchetto @petemarchetto.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

I find it odd that some adults insist that they are grown ups while the adults they oppose are not. Clearly someone, somewhere has discovered that some adults feel the need for such validation, and that it's useful in manipulating them to pat them on the head with it. It's so demeaning.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

When you're in year 11 and break up early to revise for GCSEs and want to go down the park with Azza, Critchley and Blonde Lewis but your mum says you have to take your little sister to school first.

jordan pickford leading a child mascot on to the pitch before england v croatia

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

OOOOOOOPS, Andy forgot that he has other posts.

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Jimbob @jamesthejimbob.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Don't make me tap the sign

Tweet saying: 'This does not help your cause' - guy who hates you and your cause

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Madeadeleine 💀 @pbastronaut.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

All else aside, I think the idea that political parties should only ever say things that journalists approve of it's not a great idea and even a big part to why every aspect of this country has become progressively more shit.

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

me talking about comedians who smash it in the clubs with buzzwords and hackery

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Casino (1995) @casinofilm1995.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Especially Remo, who was a fuckin’ degenerate gambler who always lost…

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Sooz Kempner @soozuk.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

"CHECK IT OUT, I CAN LITERALLY DO A DIVE HEAD FIRST IN TO A FOOT OF WATER!" My parents: 🙂👍

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