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jem cranberry

@slrjptr.bsky.social
320 followers 617 following 2.4K posts

history mom in the beetlejuice part of connecticut gourd and garlic grower, ned lamont outfit commentator, “pavement dad” type, kind of haunted she/her

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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 17h
need my husband to drive to rhode island real quick to bring me back a perfect coffee milkshake ! ! !
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🔪🔪🔪bryan 🔪 🔪 🔪 @murderxbryan.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
I’m personally thankful that Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros never made a comeback
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
blue iPhone text presented without context that says 

Cracking The Croup Code: Lisa
Rinna MD
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 11/10/2026
the cherry poppin’ daddies need to be held accountable for that
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
not to be a brat but can sweetwater send better candy?
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
having a major dad issue where the keys to our tahoe are stuck in the lining of my swishy adidas track pants
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 27/06/2025
I remember being 16 and being like why do they even bother making clean e-40 songs, who is listening to that? It’s ME 16 years later with a kid that’s who
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Zomb Abnorming @nonabsorbing.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Somebody give me a job
Graphic with five Lisa Loebs telling Sharon Stone to Stay cos she missed her
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jam @socialistboat.dad · 09/10/2026
I love listening to music from a recording artist I like a lot and thinking "damn this music from a recording artist I like a lot? I like it a lot"
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Bernie AAAHH @comp-ussr.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Depotterfication now
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
“she’s soooo beautiful”
tall son in kitten sweatshirt he loves standing next to a skeleton dressed as a witch in the gazebo on the Kent green with a bunch of pumpkins some of which are fancy
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
a moment that I live for just happened! a big bus of elderly floridians pulled up to kent falls as my son and I popped in and boy did we have fun showing them stuff
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
“Mom are skeletons mammals?”
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
ryan fazio looks like and has the energy of liz lemon’s agent who mostly represented dogs
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
my son put these here so they could get married, everyone say congrats!!!
a blue otamatone that looks like it’s smiling next to a blueberry shaped maraca that is also smiling (and blushing) and they are on either side of a picture of my grandparents on their wedding day
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
I do not have enough sauna at home I need more sauna at home I must have sauna at home
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
I would lay down my life for any staff memeber at my local recycling center
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
I met a child named Harbor today
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
jw does anyone have david byrne’s address my son woke up at 6 am and “needed” to make him a card
a pink piece of paper folded like a card with random scribbles and a 3d felt happy Thanksgiving sticker
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
if I said I was “boo-ing” my friends in town would you know what I meant?
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
my kid is named sullivan and we call him sully so he has like 3 life paths -hockey -the docks -scaring children in their rooms
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Kath Barbadoro @kathbarbadoro.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Viewing this video changed the trajectory of my day earlier
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TK @archivedspork.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
The newer parts of the USA really lose out by not having creepy 18th century head stones
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Frances: Meh and Loving It @francesmeh.reviews · 04/10/2026
google's ai proving absolutely indispensable in dublin
Overview

[AI] Know before you go 
• People say to try a pint of the popular Guinness
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I’m scared of menopause for a lot of reasons but one that’s heavy on my mind right now is that when my mom went through it she was absolutely obsessed with buying cardboard cutouts and my house is really small
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
waking up to my best friend leaving me a 7 minute voice memo detailing everything she ate at the Big E >>>>>
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HunterKiller @holybible.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Guys lets be perfect in our lives
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
keurig coffee tastes like the inside of an airplane smells
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Idea: caffeine vapes
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
4 am check in from the backseat of my car
a series of 10% haunted raggedy annes and andies in a bucket
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
girls just wanna have FUN! ^me practicing what I say to my husband when I reveal that there is a 30 year old slightly nasty commercial popcorn machine in the trunk of our car because I bought it
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
i have 1 quick question
an invoice slip from getting our oil tank filled a few years ago that says 

Date: 1/15/24
Cust #:
Invoice #:
Tickler File:
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HunterKiller @holybible.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Do draculas take showers
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
me masked and loaded up on DayQuil in a barn solo because I have an event weekend and no backup staff and some type of febrile illness
a picture of Nicki Minaj with like bride of Frankenstein Marge Simpson hair and it says “still i rise still I fight still I might crack a smile keep my eyes on the prize see my haters tell em hi” I don’t actually know the song
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spooky cannoli @boner.ink · 02/10/2026
pumpkin bf gourd gf
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
always good when everyone dislikes you to team up with jay leno
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
in a death cab for cutie shirt at work and my boss asked if they were a “heavy metal band”
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
helloooooo from the other siiiide
an old baby doll that’s maybe 35% haunted
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
feeling a bit bad about being one and done because my son just named his feet and is talking to them
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jam @socialistboat.dad · 29/09/2026
😒 "Looping you in for visibility" 😏 "Sir, you're gonna want to see this"
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
bringing a crock pot of pumpkin chili for my volunteers saturday and I have to transport that and it’s going to absolutely be a kevin from the office situation
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Stellbound: Stellraiser II @antlervel.vet · 28/09/2026
HOST: All right, British Food YouTubers… final challenge! Simply pronounce “Wagyu” correctly even one single time. BRITISH FOOD YOUTUBER 1: Waggoo. HOST: Ah, sorry, that’s incorrect. BRITISH FOOD YOUTUBER 2: Oh! Waggoo! HOST: Incorrect. BRITISH FOOD YOUTUBER 3: *smirking confidently* Waggoo.
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
boss is in the pouring rain under a falling down soggy tent grilling up franks and burgers for a pretty prominent puppeteer
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I’ve been in a physical altercation at a UConn football game, it’s called containing multitudes
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
rhyming “Tokyo” with “thin lizzy-o” is also so good forever
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 25/03/2026
maria bamford OCD wife/monk OCD husband
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
an edit of the first episode of monk where hide and seek by imogen heap plays as he fires the gun at the end
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
child has had covid, a cold, an unidentified virus with fever and an ear infection in the span of 5 weeks (and croup with all of those) and I feel so badly for him I’m about to buy him his own full sized boat
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Sophia Florence (Swolephia Arc Pt 2) @sophiaflorence.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Listen, man, you know the deal. If you're cooking something delicious in NYC, there's a 1% chance that Action Bronson comes through the wall like the Kool Aid Man and starts rapping about it. I don't make the rules. That's why it's dangerous here.
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
it’s a flyer on a community board that is white and covered in orange Subaru crosstreks and hearts and says 

2nd annual sunshine orange Subaru Crosstrek meet up and parade!
Sunday Sept. 27th
11:00 AM meet at Big Y Parking Lot
11:30 AM  roll out begins! 

And then there’s an email to respond to and a disclaimer that says * important only sunshine orange Subaru Crosstrek permitted. All other colors will be turned away no exceptions*
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