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jem cranberry

@slrjptr.bsky.social

321 followers 617 following 2.4K posts

history mom in the beetlejuice part of connecticut gourd and garlic grower, ned lamont outfit commentator, “pavement dad” type, kind of haunted she/her

Posts Replies Media

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 1h

I’m also in hugeass canvas pants and these clown clogs- soccer moms can contain multitudes even if they don’t like soccer at all

big red clogs, a canvas bag with a bright blue bottom and black barrel pants in front of a bunch of red leaves on the ground

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 1h

outfit is aggressively connecticut soccer mom as I sit and be a connecticut soccer mom. my socks say “not your bitch” though so I’m not fully stepford

yellow thrifted barbour quilted jacket with a grey also thrifted cashmere cardigan and like Mom Hair that is brown with grey sparkles

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 15/10/2026

favorite shirt alert ft. stain(s)

A white woman in weird fitting jeans with cropped brown long sleeve shirt that says “the cure” in colorful sponge paint looking letters with little flowers, the flowers extend down the arms

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 15/10/2026

POV you are rory gilmore returning home to the hills after an early dismissal at chilton

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 13/10/2026

“what do you do for work?” essentially this!

another moderately haunted doll in a barn holding a 100 year old rooster stuffed animal that is a notch above moderately haunted

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

blue iPhone text presented without context that says

Cracking The Croup Code: Lisa
Rinna MD

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

“she’s soooo beautiful”

tall son in kitten sweatshirt he loves standing next to a skeleton dressed as a witch in the gazebo on the Kent green with a bunch of pumpkins some of which are fancy

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

my son put these here so they could get married, everyone say congrats!!!

a blue otamatone that looks like it’s smiling next to a blueberry shaped maraca that is also smiling (and blushing) and they are on either side of a picture of my grandparents on their wedding day

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

jw does anyone have david byrne’s address my son woke up at 6 am and “needed” to make him a card

a pink piece of paper folded like a card with random scribbles and a 3d felt happy Thanksgiving sticker

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 03/10/2026

4 am check in from the backseat of my car

a series of 10% haunted raggedy annes and andies in a bucket

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

i have 1 quick question

an invoice slip from getting our oil tank filled a few years ago that says

Date: 1/15/24
Cust #:
Invoice #:
Tickler File:

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

me masked and loaded up on DayQuil in a barn solo because I have an event weekend and no backup staff and some type of febrile illness

a picture of Nicki Minaj with like bride of Frankenstein Marge Simpson hair and it says “still i rise still I fight still I might crack a smile keep my eyes on the prize see my haters tell em hi” I don’t actually know the song

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

helloooooo from the other siiiide

an old baby doll that’s maybe 35% haunted

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

pic from my kid’s first day of preschool board that says when I grow up I want to be a sailboat man

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

me prepping dinner in a thrifted cashmere cardigan

nara smith the very pretty influencer who cooks in very dramatic clothing

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

in a barn filled with bats and this guy…if i’m never on here again it’s because I’ve been possessed to death

a soft doll that is stained from time and is like a scary old clown with haunting googly eyes

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

It appeared nautical in nature! And then after we had paid we began to notice things

Sign on a fake red covered bridge that says let your light shine before men that they may see Jesus

Two crosses made out of what I think are like boat pieces and in the background it says America shall be saved in widow’s-bay-ass font

a small shingled church feature on hole 16 that says marvelous infinite matchless grace freely bestowed on all who believe

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

grey text bubble that says

Al is gonna kill us all, might as well go to the Rockport Mass Celtic
Music Festival

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

The bigger the barrel of your pants the more excited for preschool you are

kid in brown striped barrel pants, a mustard yellow ringer tee and chunky red sneakers with neon bottoms holding an Apple Card in front of his face

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

it’s a flyer on a community board that is white and covered in orange Subaru crosstreks and hearts and says

2nd annual sunshine orange Subaru Crosstrek meet up and parade!
Sunday Sept. 27th
11:00 AM meet at Big Y Parking Lot
11:30 AM roll out begins!

And then there’s an email to respond to and a disclaimer that says * important only sunshine orange Subaru Crosstrek permitted. All other colors will be turned away no exceptions*

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

my younger trendier sister sent me this

A person in aviator sunglasses and a headband naming fake towns in Massachusetts she made up
1. Wompasett
2. Lurley
3. Brockington
4. Stroggen
5. Moosepond
6. Ashbergton
7. Eckering
8. Samstown
9. Beavertail

lindseykaralias
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jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

my friend and I were discussing texts from last night and I found mine that was on there in 2012

It says the area code 203 and then

(203): MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet. life is over.

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

I kind of laughed because maybe you could find 1 single uber driver?

it’s a post on Connecticut Reddit asking if they can find a reliable taxi in washington which has a population of 3,646 and I feel like half of those are weekenders. It mentions this guest is going to the Gilmore girls festival and this is another strike against GG for giving people a false sense of transportation up here

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

this is coming up at american mural project in winsted and looks very good #nutmegsky

an ad for an a event called Who Were The Wobblies and it features a black and white photo of people picketing with signs

HISTORY AFTER HOURS:
FILM and TALK
Who Were the Wobblies?
Labor Activism in the Gilded Age
Friday, September 18 | 5-7pm
This program highlights the story of the Industrial Workers of the World (the "Wobblies") and their seismic role in labor history. The Wobblies solicited new union members among the most discriminated-against groups of the workforce: unskilled workers, non-whites, immigrants, women, and migrant workers who were barred from the American Federation of Labor, which tended to support white, male, skilled workers. The I.W.W. hoped to create "one big union" through which workers would own the means of production and distribution. Historian Hamish Lutris and author/activist Steve Thornton will lead the discussion following the screening of The Wobblies.
REGISTER
Part of American Mural Project's America250 programming, supported by CT Humanities

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

can’t wait for fall so I can really start dressing

Guy-fieri-looking green and black tie dye shirt with racing graphics and flame lettering that says Nate The Kid With The Crown Three-Time Champion and there is a picture of Nate Amos who performs as This Is Lorelei

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

when i was a kid my mom was a nurse at the penis doctor shoppe, my kid has it better because his mom works at a tractor graveyard

little kid in big pants and fun red sneakers walking on an accessible trail near a bunch of 100+ year old farm equipment in front of a small red barn and animal grazing area

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

The bugs bunny meme where he says lord forgive me and is holding a gun in a suit and it says lord forgive me I just had an apple cider donut in August

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

my son invented a new game where I draw ghosts and he “gets the eyes and mouths”

5 poorly drawn chalk ghosts in rainbow colors with different leaves and twigs for eyes and mouth, there is one that has 3 pieces of Easter chalk shaped like eggs for a mouth and eyes.

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

bill bellicheck dressed like liz lemon’s dad in the episode where he comes to the city for a gentleman’s walkabout (fuckass embroidered hat, graphic tee with huge font repping an adult cheerleading team, weird index finger ring and he’s doing hand symbols like an 8th grader in 2006 listening to rap)

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 22/08/2026

I don’t care about your zodiac sign, spiritually which one are you

the various hosts of this Old House- kevin, roger (RIP truly), richard, tom and norm. They are dressed like northeast dads from 10 years ago and are in a wood shop

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

kind of doing a rebrand for my son

a Poshmark listing for 5 full adidas track suits for a 4 year old in various kind of drab colors

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

just thought everyone could use this

a black shirt with white sleeves in not great condition at the junk shop that says “beat it creep” in slightly-yellowed white lettering

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

grey text bubble on an iPhone that says

Janene garafalo is coming to Edmond in February

It is from my dad and Janeane is spelled wrong

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

doing gregorian chanting

Little building on the water that is white with bold red trim and it says Lobster Landing in red font

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

PAUL NEWMAN STRAIGHT

Picture of cars on a racetrack near a bunch of trees and hills and it says PAUL NEWMAN STRAIGHT in big white font on a red banner, it is November so the trees are mostly bare

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

my nice friend brought me this as a sorry-your-grandpa-died care package and I like being the friend you bring weird produce to

I don’t really know what kind of squash this is but it is light green and truly over 2 feet long it’s as wide as the 8 person table it’s pictured on, there is a small jar of “mid” zinnias for scale in the center of a star wood pattern on the table

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

me anytime I end up seeing what that blonde basketball lady is saying

the mom of mercer meyer’s critter looking horrified and also disgusted

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

zinyers again #bloomsky

various zinnias in sherbet colors, a light apple-y green and two that are candy striped. They are pictured on my coworker’s desk because I like her

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

not enough people talking about how much this look rips

the mom from the wild thornberries and she’s in high waisted cool girl barrel jeans, a chic little belt, slim green boots, a puffer vest that’s cropped, and little frameless oval glasses, she has super thin brows and her hair is in a bandana- she is leaving no crumbs she is absolutely serving etc.

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

Pure Michigan

A toddler in a bright swim set with beach toys standing on the beach of a lake with a blue sky and a lot of trees on an island

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

zinyers

zinnias in sherbet and white and a fun light green color on a wooden table

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

this is so us!!!

my son and me!!!!! (it’s a picture of hall and oats)

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

this is about 1/5th of what we pulled today, I hope our elderly neighbors are ready to go rabbit mode

a clam hod on an unfinished wood deck about 1/2 filled with round Romeo carrots, there is a haunted looking purple iced tea and pruners next to it

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 21/07/2026

husband found something good

A picture of a silver Kia soul slapped on top of a photo of grey shed so it looks like the soul is being displayed on top of the shed but it’s trickery etc.

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 21/07/2026

my child thinks this is his grandson

white lady with a bad haircut right now and a beige flat brimmed corduroy hat in a black sweater set on a dock hugging a big fluffy black dog in a life vest and there is water and trees and clouds behind her and a puff of white blonde three year old curls in front of her

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

a little bit regretful that we watched widow’s bay this week

very grey foggy ominous sky over water with a dock and everything looks haunted

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 17/07/2026

i said “me likey” out loud when I saw this and am really upset over that reaction

a cream and cranberry striped zinnia with a white hand holding it and there is pale baby poop yellow siding behind it, it’s a sunny day

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 17/07/2026

wafer ice cream cone

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

grey iPhone text bubble that says

“She’s jerking (werking in Jean shorts)

jem cranberry @slrjptr.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

Okay, brag

a wooden telephone pole with a sign that says I BUY POKÉMON on it with a phone number in front of some 19th century brick buildings (I am fully stopped at a stop light and my car turns off OKAY)