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Pete Roman

@peteroman.bsky.social
93 followers 108 following 442 posts

Retired lawyer whose best job ever was in the recreation department of a mental institution. I like to write jokes. Warning: Occasional puns.

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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 12/05/2026
Trump is seriously mentally ill.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
How Ancient Centipede Ancestors Conquered the Earth www.nytimes.com/2026/05/05/s... And now we know the ancestors of today's political elite.
nytimes.com
How Ancient Centipede Ancestors Conquered the Earth
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Christopher Moore @theauthorguy.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
A $400 million dollar ballroom? A billion dollar a day war of choice. Tens of millions on golf trips. $60 million dollar birthday parade. Disbanding the Forest Service A billion $ to STOP building wind farms (may be 2bil.) And these monsters want to take money away from poor, disabled people.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
Trump's image to appear on limited-edition passports for America's 250th abcnews.com/Politics/tru... [Jeebus, what an ugly visage to bestow upon the world. Is this some insider's idea of a joke? This is the best picture they could come up with?]
abcnews.com
Trump's image to appear on limited-edition passports for America's 250th
The State Department is releasing a limited-edition U.S. passport to mark America's 250th anniversary and the document will feature President Donald Trump's image.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 28/04/2026
I was thinking that Zuckerberg's Meta AI should acquire fiber-enhancer Metamucil, and create a new division, Meta Mucil AI. It will help people with brain farts.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 27/04/2026
The US Mint buys some gold that originates in a Colombian drug cartel mine and other dubious places. Even Trump’s 24-karat gold coin may come from illegal gold. Explore this gift article from The New York Times. www.nytimes.com/2026/04/26/w...
nytimes.com
U.S. Mint Buys Drug Cartel Gold and Sells It as ‘American’
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Julie Lavender Menace @2tickytacky.bsky.social · 26/04/2026
How do you handle a fly infestation? Send in a swat team.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 23/04/2026
You can substitute just about any country's flag for the Canadian flag.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 23/04/2026
The insider trading suspicions looming over Trump's presidency bbc.com/news/article...
bbc.com
The insider trading suspicions looming over Trump's presidency
The BBC has found a pattern of spikes in trades ahead of public announcements by the US president.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 23/04/2026
FBI Launched Probe of New York Times Reporter Following Unflattering Coverage of Kash Patel www.democracynow.org/2026/4/23/he... via @democracynow
democracynow.org
FBI Launched Probe of New York Times Reporter Following Unflattering Coverage of Kash Patel
The FBI launched an investigation last month into New York Times reporter Elizabeth Williamson after she published a story revealing that FBI Director Kash Patel had assigned federal agents to provide...
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 23/04/2026
I grew up in a town with two barbers, Max or Joe. I always went to Max (his shop had comics). I asked my dad about going to Joe. He said: "Joe has a contract to cut hair at the hospital for the criminally insane. He cuts everybody the same so you'll look like that." I went to Joe. My dad was right.
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Michelle @michelleroy78.bsky.social · 23/04/2026
My Therapist: "What animal best describes you?" Me: "A gazelle...an old one...with arthritis...hit by a jeep...ten days ago.
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Reverie @augustreverie.bsky.social · 08/04/2026
It’s so dumb that end-of-the-world anxiety didn’t cure me of all the other anxieties
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 23/04/2026
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
Fox News’ Sean Hannity Explains Why "As of Today" He Has Left the Catholic Church. He's angry at the Pope's anti-war statements. www.thedailybeast.com/ex-catholic-... There's a problem with his story. He said he left the church in 2019 too. www.christianpost.com/news/sean-ha...
yahoo.com
Fox News’ Sean Hannity Explains Why He Left the Catholic Church After ‘Institutionalized Corruption’
Fox News host Sean Hannity is explaining his decision to leave the Catholic church long before President Donald Trump criticized Pope Leo XIV. “As of today, I no longer consider myself a Catholic. I a...
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NPR @npr.org · 18/04/2026
Twenty-nine people have died in ICE custody since October, the start of the federal government's fiscal year, already surpassing 2004's toll of 28, the previous record, according to government data. n.pr/4sLetjV
n.pr
Deaths of migrants in ICE custody hit record high under Trump
Twenty-nine people have died in ICE custody since October, the start of the federal government's fiscal year, already surpassing 2004's toll of 28, the previous record, according to government data.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
In baseball news, the Washington Nationals have acquired a new relief pitcher - Dick Lovelady. www.mlb.com/nationals/ne...
mlb.com
Nationals reunite with LHP Lovelady in trade with Mets for cash
LOS ANGELES -- Richard Lovelady's whirlwind tour of the Majors continued on Thursday, when the Mets traded him back to the very team that designated him for assignment last month. The Mets dealt Lovel...
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
The Trump administration has abruptly canceled an $11 million contract with Catholic Charities to shelter and care for migrant children who enter the U.S. alone, ending a long relationship between the Catholic Church and the US. www.miamiherald.com/news/local/i...
miamiherald.com
Amid quarrel with pope, Trump strips Miami charity of funding to house migrant kids
The move comes amid rising tensions between the administration and American Catholics.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
NYC's mayor just signed an executive order prohibiting plumbers and other service people from wearing clothes that expose their buttocks crack when bending down. He acknowledges council legislation may be required but figured this would be a stop gap solution.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
Florida's governor just signed into law prohibiting people from peeling the flaky skin from sunburns. It's aimed at teens and others who don't realize peeling damages the skin. Voters are up in arms. They want to repeal.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 16/04/2026
To paraphrase an old quote, if Trump, Vance and Hegseth are Christian, then I'm the Yankees shortstop.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 16/04/2026
I have failed, despite repeated attempts, in persuading my wife that the Panini press was invented by the 19th century Italian opera composer Umberto Panini. Damn internet.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
On the Trump blockade, Iran is trolling and trolling.
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born miserable @bornmiserable.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
you know what’s not weak on crime? love
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
Trump said this today in a live interview
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
Trump claims he was portraying a doctor in that picture he had to take down. Here's Trump as an airplane pilot.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
Trump's mad at the Pope, but I think an exorcism would do Trump good.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
A Truth Social post that depicts the president as Jesus is no longer visible on President Trump’s account. However, his lengthy attack on Pope Leo remains. www.nytimes.com/2026/04/12/u...
nytimes.com
Trump Attacks Pope Leo as Too Liberal and ‘Weak on Crime’
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
Trump’s Erratic Behavior and Extreme Comments Revive Mental Health Debate www.nytimes.com/2026/04/13/u... No kidding. When many questioned Biden's senility, influential Democrats like Obama and Harris told him he had to withdraw. Vance so far has been a weak sycophant.
nytimes.com
Trump’s Erratic Behavior and Extreme Comments Revive Mental Health Debate
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
A religious group, the Knights Templar, demanded that Trump remove this sacrilegious picture from X, saying it mocked God. x.com/KnightsTempO... He deleted it. After all, the Knights supported him politically.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
Mt. McKinley for 10 years reverted to its old name Denali. Trump turned it back. By executive order he now says federal contractors and offices must follow that designation. I think that means that GMC, which sells trucks to the US, has to change its GMC Sierra Denali to GMC Sierra McKinley. Catchy.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
Business idea>You know those self-storage places? They should have really small refrigerated units if you need to store a loved one who has died and you can't quite part with them. Or, maybe the funeral plans got messed up. Or, maybe you just need to hide a body.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
Native Americans were gambling with dice 6,000 years earlier than anyone else, study says www.theguardian.com/science/2026... Do you think they had casinos?
theguardian.com
Native Americans were gambling with dice 6,000 years earlier than anyone else, study says
Archaeological record suggests hunter gatherers were playing games of chance at the end of the last ice age
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Siege @tellumsiege.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
There must be a blockage in my charisma ducts because I swear I used to ooze more of it.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 10/04/2026
These Chimps Began the Bloodiest ‘War’ on Record. No One Knows Why. www.nytimes.com/2026/04/09/s... Note: This is not just another article about Trump and Netanyahu
nytimes.com
These Chimps Began the Bloodiest ‘War’ on Record. No One Knows Why.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 09/04/2026
New York Times headline of the year (so far): To Topple the Patriarchy, These Women Have Sex With Vegetables www.nytimes.com/2026/04/07/b...
nytimes.com
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Michelle @michelleroy78.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
I’ve got a 5k this weekend. It was a 401k on Wednesday.
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Michelle @michelleroy78.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
Jury duty is wierd. It's like "Cancel all your plans Ma'am. We need you to solve a mystery. Oh, and here's $8 a day."
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
Trump is now threatening to end Persian civilization. But with it, perhaps Western "Civilization" too? Western Europe has done little to stop him and his bosom buddy in Israel. What kind of "civilization" countenances mass murder? And bombing hospitals, and rescuers?
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
Ever thought of being a professional gnome? Here are the secrets of the occupation. www.instagram.com/reel/DWneaR4...
instagram.com
Instagram
Create an account or log in to Instagram - Share what you're into with the people who get you.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
Lawsuit Accuses Americans of Political Killings for Hire Overseas You can read it for free without a subscription. www.nytimes.com/2026/03/30/w...
nytimes.com
Lawsuit Accuses Americans of Political Killings for Hire Overseas
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Antiwar.com @antiwardotcom.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
Boxed in by Iran by John Mearsheimer | Apr 3, 2026 www.antiwar.com/blog/2026/04...
antiwar.com
John Mearsheimer & Stephen Walt: Boxed in by Iran - Antiwar.com Blog
Reprinted from John's Substack: On 29 March 2026, Steve Walt and I were together on “Switzerland” talking with Tom Switzer about the Iran war and its broader geopolitical consequences. We also spent c...
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
Ever thought of being a professional gnome? Here are the secrets of the occupation. www.instagram.com/reel/DWneaR4...
instagram.com
Instagram
Create an account or log in to Instagram - Share what you're into with the people who get you.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
Children race to gather marshmallows dropped from a helicopter at pair of parks. "I'd swear that I thought marshmallows could fly." abcnews.com/Lifestyle/wi...
abcnews.com
Children race to gather marshmallows dropped from a helicopter at pair of parks
It rained marshmallows at two Detroit-area parks as kids raced to collect thousands of the gooey treats dropped from a helicopter
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
A reckless driver, drunk on power, crossing lines, endangering others, but not caring where he's going, as long as he's in the driver's seat.
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
For the First Time, a Toilet Heads Into Deep Space www.nytimes.com/video/scienc... I just love the headline.
nytimes.com
Video: For the First Time, a Toilet Heads Into Deep Space
The Orion spacecraft will take four crew members and one commode around the moon and back as part of the Artemis II mission. In April 2025, National Geographic worked with NASA and filmed the astronau...
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
www.instagram.com/reel/DWnC961... The Artemis rocket on the way to the moon, taken from an airplane window
instagram.com
katie_mccuistion on Instagram: "Crew of Artemis on their way to the moon #astronauts #artemisII #moon #NASA #Deltaflight581View all 1,138 comments"
Crew of Artemis on their way to the moon #astronauts #artemisII #moon #NASA #Deltaflight581View all 1,138 comments
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 02/04/2026
Trump fires Bondi. Explore this gift article from The New York Times. You can read it for free without a subscription. www.nytimes.com/live/2026/04...
nytimes.com
Trump Administration Live Updates: Bondi Fired as Attorney General
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
For your allergic companion . . .
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Pete Roman @peteroman.bsky.social · 29/03/2026
Donald Trump's only friend is his dog. Oh, he hasn't one?
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