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Ari

@kobaltjew.bsky.social
657 followers 591 following 1.4K posts

Queer, Jewish, witchy-adjacent, and obsessed with my little dog. Obviously not speaking for or on behalf of my employer. Fiber artist that is into WIPs and chains.

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Reposted by Ari
Phil Plait @philplait.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Aid and comfort to the enemy
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Bee, not afraid.
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G @gpatrick.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Sums up my feelings. 
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
If I could find a way to hibernate in the summer and still keep my job, I think I would.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Wait. Chris Olah, one of Anthropic’s cofounders, wanted the Pope to actually entertain the idea that machines have consciousness? What in the Bladerunner dystopian science-fiction was was he thinking? What arrogance.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I’d also take the pennies. Reasoning? They’ve been discontinued. In several years, they’ll be worth more than they’d normally be worth simply because they’d be harder to find as a vast majority of them would be melted down by then.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
What would you say as a Gen X or Elder Milenial if I said I didn’t like Metallica? I got the impression when I was in high school that I was /supposed/ to like them. I even bought one of their albums. They just have so very few songs I ever got into, though.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Dogs, man. I love ‘em. This one makes a little “hrumph” sound and lays down when he doesn’t get what he wants. I’ve never known a dog to let me know when they are so clearly annoyed, but not enough to do anything about it.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
“I’m sorry, dog, but you are not gonna convince me you’ve never, ever been fed when I put food in your bowl 5 minutes ago.” Me, to my dog who is now grumping because I won’t give him a bite of my breakfast
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Waiter, there’s fantasy in my Star Trek.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
What distinguishes a fraternity from a cult, anyway?
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
CAN I FILL OUT THE FORM WHEN I GET THERE OR NOT? I don’t want to argue about appointment times, I want my question answered.
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M.O.D.O.X. @modox613.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
And here I thought it was “Schmatt.” Maybe it’s a regional thing.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I think Sen. Eric Schmitted himself out of a Presidential run. How embarrassing.
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The fetid remains of Richard Jensen (No AI.) @theragingcelt.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
[SENATOR ERIC SCHMITT]: So you’re telling me under oath that you've never met anyone from the David E. Kelly Series THE PRACTICE? [JACK SMITH]: Correct [SCHMITT]: WELL THEN *unveils poster* please explain this picture of you with Dylan McDermott! [SMITH]: That is Dermot Mulroney, sir.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
So, how about those Iowa Hawkeyes, anyway?
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Billionaires beware: when there is an insufficient amount of safe food for the populace to eat, the populace may decide you look like a meal.
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Soliloking @raclapper.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
For the uninitiated
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Justin. @uhjustin.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Few people know the Egyptians invented the Gravitron
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
The Charmed writers seem to have a love/hate relationship with that attic window.
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Will "scifantasy" Frank @scifantasy.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
thefump.com/music/song/p...
thefump.com
The FuMP - Phở Queue by Dino-Mike
A sqeaky clean song about waiting in line for soup. Written & Performed: Dino-Mike with the great Luke Ski Back-Up Vocals: Zelda Pinwheel Produced, Mixed and Mastered: Bob Emmet
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
“Where’d you get those noodles?” “At the Pho King Noodle Restaurant.” “Where?” “You heard me.”
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
There is a place nearby called “Pho King Noodle Restaurant.” I snicker every time I see the name. I’m sure the owners knew exactly what they were doing.
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Walker Bragman @walkerbragman.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
This “noticing” talking point comes out of white nationalist/neo-Nazi circles. Typically part of antisemitic conspiracy theories.
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Mrs. Detective PikaBOO, Esq. @clapifyoulikeme.favrd.social · 10/09/2026
Fact check: true, we are not ready for this take
"Luigi Mangione ultimately accomplished slightly more for American healthcare than
Barack Obama" is the sort of hot take that a lot of people on this site are not ready for.
4:52 PM • Sep 10, 2026 6 Everybody can reply
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Kathryn Brightbill ✒️ @kebrightbill.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
People don't remember what life was like for people with preexisting conditions before the ACA and it shows.
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Lain Kaplan, Mouthy Jewess 🏳️‍🌈💗🏳️‍⚧️ @lainkaplan.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
I hadn’t thought someone could make a joke fitting for Rosh Hashanah, but … here it is.
Threads user justiseofficial writes:
Last week my doctor told me to keep my daily caloric intake to fewer than whatever the year is. So today I converted to Judaism.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
This meeting could have been a scream into the void
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
“He makes me laugh.” ~Jessica Rabbit, said about her husband, Roger.
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ghost malone ergo propter bones @proptermalone.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
i posted earlier about the Starbucks boycott and unsurprisingly got a couple dozen people telling me they don't drink Starbucks anyway so it'd be easy and, yeah, just thinking about that for no reason
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Jessica Ellis @baddestmamajama.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
“30% OFF SOCKS!!” Yes those are called ankle socks.
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Xero now with 100% more 🎃 @artificer-ind.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Still patiently waiting to be "left behind" by AI rather than it chasing me across every damn space like a slasher in a low budget flick.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Videos with a single caption expecting you to read the comments are a blight on social media. It’s obnoxious bullshit and I hate it. You want me to read your stuff? Great! Write a full post sans video! You want to make a video? EXPLAIN THE CAPTION IN THE VIDEO.
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They Might Be Giants @tmbg.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Not agreeing or disagreeing whether this dude rocks. I’m dubious this is real if only because filming yourself bragging about stealing an ATM and then telling the world of your plans to launder the money seems like amateur hour. Great details, though. The blue ink on his fingers sells it.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Apparently a Christian Camp got booted from Burning Man. They are already claiming persecution. The real story is they were repeatedly breaking the rules and were asked to leave. Why is this such a common theme?
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
This is a large part of my job. I work in the sanctions dept. at a bank. Sometimes this happens. I’m not sure if this is because clients aren’t reading the questions or because they are responding with what they /think/ we need or what.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Hi, <company>! I need more information about entity “X”. Please do not respond with information about entity “Y.” Thanks so much!
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Endless Screaming @infinitescream.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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Ric Scare @reedonly.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
This is why ancient Israel rejected so many of the Prophets (they were independent pollsters)
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
I find L1 tech support frustrating for the exact opposite reason L1 tech support finds users frustrating.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Hey, Sam Altman: it’s not just the data centers. Your industry is coming for people’s lively-hoods. Get bent, bootlicker.
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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 01/07/2025
“I know you think you’re being funny, but honestly Dave, it’s just hurtful.”
A Borzoi dog, looking forlorn, sits next to a dresser as their owner mimics them using a sock puppet adorned with googly eyes.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
If I never hear the name Mel Gibson ever again it’ll be too soon. Like, the only way that man stays at all relevant is when he’s showing his ass. Then reporters report on him showing his ass. Reporters, you do not need to help this man show his ass.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
“Do you really still need these?”, my CVS app asks. I have been under the false impression the pharmacy was out of Vyvanse for the past month. I’ve now been told they can’t auto-order these because they are a controlled substance. “Just let us know when you are down to three pills”
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Premillennial Decompensationalist @smollusk.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Zero Fucking Patience for bothsidesing the rise of fascism
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
The joke that is trying to order and pick up my prescription stimulants for ADHD from the pharmacy is a cruel one. It is inherently anti-ADHD friendly.
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Ari @kobaltjew.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Anyone else caught up on One Piece. I’m watching the sub’d Elbaph arc. This show might crush me. The latest episode is /rough/.
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Sky Marchini @sky.skymarchini.net · 31/08/2026
this is a certified Brianna Wu moment
Post
Conversation
Brianna Wu
@BriannaWu
·
7h
Hi, I need to make an apology about something I said that crossed the line. 

Free Palestine posted a video of a Jew condemning Israel in my mentions and asked what I thought about it. 

I blithely said, “He’s a Kapo.” 

This was insensitive and wrong and I apolo…. yeah that’s a
Brianna Wu
@BriannaWu
Can a Jewish friend please give me the K pass?
5:43 PM · Aug 30, 2026
·
359.2K
 
Views

https://x.com/BriannaWu/status/2094179172608262435
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