theonion.com
Nation Could Have Sworn Russell Brand Was Already Convicted Sex Offender
NEW YORK—Stressing that the memory seemed so fresh and vivid in their minds, the confused nation announced Monday that they could have sworn British entertainer Russell Brand was already a convicted s...
![Cartoon by Stephen Collins for the Guardian.
[Scene is BBC BREAKFAST with two presenters and a guest on the sofa].
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PRESENTER:
Now - some disturbing new research has shown
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PRESENTER:
that as many as 10 non-Reform political parties may currently operating ‘under the radar’ across the UK.
[Show on screen logos for Greens, Lib Dems, Conservatives
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PRESENTER:
In the studio to discuss this, Nigel Farage
[We see the guest on the sofa is indeed Nigel Farage]
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PRESENTER:
Nigel, what’s your view?
FARAGE:
Well I think this very worrying.
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FARAGE:
And just another reason why we should ban all immigration.
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PRESENTER:
I won’t push back on that
FARAGE:
Absolutely!
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PRESENTER:
Funnily enough, this is what your new show’s about, isn’t it?
FARAGE:
Oop - plug time!
PRESENTER:
Ha ha
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FARAGE:
Yes it’s a 12-part BBC documentary called ‘In Search Of The Political Parties That Aren’t My One’.
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[Show on the TV screen Farage presenting a documentary series titled In Search Of The Political Parties That Aren’t My One. He is wearing his farmer's getup and looking dreamily at the UK from hillsides, visiting pubs and chatting with the locals, etc]
FARAGE:
It’s a really emotional journey
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FARAGE:
with lots of dreamy footage of me looking relatable...
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FARAGE:
as I answer the question:
*Am I the only option for Britain?*
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[Cut back to studio]
PRESENTER:
I won’t push back on that
FARAGE:
Absolutely!
[ends]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreidseyojvyqngmitl76iafvvbvgg4a3i7a26642c2c3gacoi7pwtbi)
