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DanDan

@gidwyz.bsky.social
66 followers 154 following 202 posts

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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Just got home from the dentist. I got two fillings. At one point the drilling had been going on long enough that I thought any moment they would give me a stack of dishes to dry with a linty towel because clearly I had died and was in hell. Also, Xanax doesn’t work all that well.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I dreamed I told Jose Ramirez I love him and then he hit an RBI single.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Stop trying to make elevators fancy. Elevator doesn't need an iPad
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
I hate it when you go into a conference room after someone and it smells like teeth.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
So unsettling to get into an elevator and there’s already some in there but they’re just standing there with no floor selected
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Danny Page @danny.page · 17/09/2026
God bless @atherton.bsky.social for this succinct wisdom
Kelsey D. Atherton - tweet from 2019

Oh, you're experiencing a structural problem? Have you ever considered trying different personal choices instead?
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Platypus is a hoax
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Today, for the first time, I used a power washer. This device was—in the literal sense—awesome. It inspired awe.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
How do you talk to your winter dog about global warming?
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
The bank has a sign, "Personalized financial advice from JP Morgan." Makes it sound like ol'John Pierpont himself is going to give me tips
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Micah @rincewind.run · 06/08/2026
as a kid I liked math and thought I was good at it and then I got to college and learned that real math is contemptuous of numbers and it confuses and terrifies me
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
Nice. I got $7.31 from a Facebook class action. Thanks for the coffee, Zuckz
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
When I die, mix my ashes with ketchup and squirt them on the ivy at Wrigley Field
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
Yeah. Still don't like soccer.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
Not a chance that Madonna's mic was live
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
Why am I fine with openly peeing at the urinal, but lock the stall to pee alone?
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anti-zionist dog 🇵🇸 @puppydoggaming.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
i will say lindsey graham being asked by a reporter how mitch mcconnell is doing, answering “i don’t know, i’m going to check right now” and then dying is hilarious
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Danielle Froom 🏳️‍🌈 @danifroom.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Look at my opposition party, dawg, I'm gonna die in a camp
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
I gave it a real try but. I don't like soccer.
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Luke O'Neil @lukeoneil47.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
As a US politician you can routinely call for, and use your considerable power to vote for and agitate for the deaths of tens of thousands of innocent people around the world and it doesn't count as killing them for some reason. A person who does that is not a killer for some reason.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
What if airport lounges were good? There should be a gym. And games. And ice cream.
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🗽LOLGOP🗽 @lolgop.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
80 million Americans proved themselves single issue voters. That single issue? More diarrhea. Lots of it. Heavy on the explosive. Anything else would be woke.
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LJ Pemberton @ljabouttown.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
remember kids, there’s no fertility crisis if you’re not a white supremacist
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Cosmik Shriek 😱 @brightanimal.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
"Highest court in the land" what a joke. Shit on em
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Faisal فيصل @faisalhamadah.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
It will never stop being funny to me that the street fighter subreddit has a much better, well reasoned ai policy vis a vis literally all universities.
Hi, thanks for posting! We do appreciate you thinking of us even though we have to moderate.

Our stance on all AI generated content (Images, Video, Voiceovers, and whatever else LLM based AI gets up to in the future):

At best, they are approximations of street fighter characters as the AI has no clue what it is trying to create. Because of this, there is no street fighter content so they are not allowed. (rule 1)

Also, they aren't allowed per our source rule. As AI sources cannot be tracked, we must assume that they use uncredited sources in the learning data. (rule 5)

Finally, AI images, video, text, and voiceovers are barely any different than posting a screenshot of a google search. The level of effort is so low that we consider it spam (rule 3).

Because of these reasons, AI art and other AI content is not allowed.

If you would like to contact the moderators about this removal, you can do so here.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 16/06/2026
Today in anxiety nightmare UX, Slack sent me an Email, while I was on vacation, telling me that my team has sent 866,175 messages recently.
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Dan of the Year @downwithdan.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
TEMBA, HIS ARMS WIDE
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LJ Pemberton @ljabouttown.bsky.social · 15/04/2026
I’ve got a new story in @thedodgemag.bsky.social today, thanks to @addisonzeller.bsky.social ! He’s not with The Dodge anymore, but he’s still in my top ten. Read it at your own risk. thedodgemag.com/spring-2026-...
thedodgemag.com
The Individual - The Dodge
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
Australian coffee is a roller coaster and I am in the front row screaming with my arms up
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pixelatedboat aka “mr bluesky” @pixelatedboat.bsky.social · 05/04/2026
the Artemis II crew just posted a new photo. what the fuck
The planet Earth being flipped off
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Jill Twiss @jilltwiss.bsky.social · 29/03/2026
Ok step one is to make them look less delicious
WIRECUTTER
Microplastics Are
Everywhere. Here's How to Avoid Eating Them.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 28/03/2026
One thing about The X-Files is it really reminds you how shitty flashlights used to be in the 90s. Now anyone with $40 can buy a 100,000 lumen LED that attaches to your pistol and would light up the spooky sewer like an operating theater
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 22/03/2026
Figuring out that I like setting things up a lot more than I like actually using them.
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Schooley @schooley.bsky.social · 17/03/2026
Starting a war with goals is woke.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 11/03/2026
I don't know anything about this guy's politics or qualifications for judge. But I think we can all agree that he is definitely a werewolf, right?
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Cosmik Shriek 😱 @brightanimal.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
I just don't think this is conduct becoming of a FIFA Peace Prize recipient
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 27/02/2026
I don't know if children are supposed to be driving a forklift but the exclamation leads me to believe they must be a prodigy
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Micah @rincewind.run · 21/02/2026
what do you mean “the Olympics are almost over” what am I supposed to do now that I can’t watch lunatics do backflips off an ice chute or people skiing up the mountain for some godforsaken reason this is bullshit, run them back next week
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 21/02/2026
Bought the 2lb bag of nerds gummy clusters from Costco and now I have a tummyache
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Brandon Williams @stupidartpunk.bsky.social · 14/02/2026
I keep hearing that the Epstein files are so big if we held everyone accountable everything would collapse. And no it wouldn’t. These rich guys don’t do any actual work. They aren’t actually important or useful they are just rich.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 12/02/2026
What are you wearing to the Bsky debutante ball
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 08/02/2026
Flight attendant tried to pretend she couldn't read my name because "the printer messed up". Yeah. Sure. It was "the printer" and not half-assed romanization of an illiterate child's confused self-identification 3 generations ago that made my name inscrutable.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 08/02/2026
The Sound is like glass this morning
Pike Place market
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 08/02/2026
@kintha.bsky.social would insist that as an amateur, I may not use this. It's for ramen professionals only.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
It's there anything more satisfying than the sound of some really good grit going up the vacuum?
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 06/02/2026
The matter of fact simplicity of the bar icon. Its place in the holy trinity of air travel: toilet, baggage claim, martini.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 06/02/2026
I can't help it. I love a fake service dog. Their faces look like they're in on the grift. But the same way Pinky was in on Brain's plans. Dogs love cahoots.
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 05/02/2026
The squirrels that live in the tree in the dog park, next to the expressway, are either the bravest or stupidest creatures in the world
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 02/02/2026
Drama about a Chicago private detective duo called Clark and Lake
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DanDan @gidwyz.bsky.social · 26/01/2026
Training my dog to bite anyone who says, "Happy Monday"
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