Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 14/10/2026Maybe I'm stupid, but this is common for diplomatic gifts, no? Like, you get to keep the chocolate and MAYBE the tie clip, but the big ticket stuff is "for the people" and gets put on display somewhere. 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 12/10/2026Had a dream that there was a Discworld character named "Feather" who was a wolf person who braided and tufted her fur into "feathers" so she could live with the bird people, and there was a huge hullabaloo about whether this was A) good and B) deliberate trans representation from Sir Pterry 020
Reposted by Hammered MahlerAnn LeBlanc @robotleblanc.bsky.social · 09/10/2026friday is for kafkaposting 4671861699
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 03/10/2026I can't believe they're going to kill Ponce de Leon 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 25/09/2026I've had the Sanford and Son theme song stuck in my head and awful lot for somebody's never seen Sanford and Son 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 23/09/2026Turning left is always either too reckless or too cautious, and in either situation it puts too much vulnerability and emotional instability on one or both parties for a first date. 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 23/09/2026I used to think the pipe weapon from Clue (and crucially the Clue books) was a smoking pipe, and dedicated a lot of bandwidth figuring out how to beat someone to death with a meerschaum. 191
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 21/09/2026God, I'm still so mad Dungeon Settlers had to go and fail at the final hurdle with AI localization. Rimworld slapped over a dungeon crawler releasing the literal day I was about to have a bunch of time off work? It's like it was made for me personally. 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 21/09/2026I just don't buy "pedophile protector" as an insult. It's clunky and you're adding a word with no punch in the name of alliteration. Just call them pedophiles! Who cares! There's no reason to do what they're doing if they're not also pedophiles! 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 19/09/2026We're going to reinvent court eunuchs from first principles by 2035 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 19/09/2026Once every 3-4 years I go "surely I'm misremembering how little salt that shit had. Surely it would be closed if it's as bad as I'm remembering" and trick myself into trying it again. 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 19/09/2026You ever wonder if being in The Wiggles post Bluey feels a bit like being Francis Fukuyama on September 12th? 001
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 29/08/2026Hate it when you get a medium ticket kids play item (most recent example a pop-up play tent) and it comes with $1.30 worth of plastic accessories. Who thinks this is a value add? 001
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 29/08/2026That guy is going to be so confused about what green eggs and ham tastes like when it hasn't been soaked in seawater. 010
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 29/08/2026The only good thing David French and David Frum have ever done is decide to be shitty in ways that largely overlap so you don't need to waste energy remembering which is which. 000
Reposted by Hammered MahlerBlaise Boo-lysse Bernard Collins @wittywebhandle.bsky.social · 27/08/2026 19711
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 04/08/2026Didn't realize my doctor was using some fuckass AI transcription service at my last appointment and I asked if I needed any kind of booster with measles being on the rise again and now my chart says I'm not vaccinated against measles. 000
Reposted by Hammered Mahler🎃 It’s the Mid Pumpkin, Emily 🎃 @lefttheprairie.bsky.social · 01/08/2026It’s so funny when people are like “sure you’re an abolitionist now but wait until you’re the victim of a property crime.” Buddy, the most useful thing the police have ever done for property crime is put the form you need to submit to your insurance online. 1815803758
Reposted by Hammered MahlerpistachiOoOoOo 👻👻👻 @streetlightlily.horntforgood.com · 31/01/2026You don’t want hands free driving, you want trains. You want trains you want trains you want TRAINS 1879212538
Reposted by Hammered MahlerDenver Westword @westword.com · 27/07/2026"As a pedestrian, I support them more than the oblivious drivers on the roads in pedestrian filled areas. They’re less likely to kill me," one Westword reader says about dirt bikes on Denver's streets. www.westword.com/opinion/denver-pre…westword.comReader: I support dirt bikes more than the oblivious drivers on the roads."They're less likely to kill me!" 052
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 27/07/2026I don't know, I just feel like our food infrastructure breaking down at the same time as AI bullshit being everywhere is combining to get to me in a way that they didn't separately. 100
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 26/07/2026War is making mistakes at each other until one of you stops being able to send enough soldiers and weapons (and food). 000
Reposted by Hammered MahlerThe Old Hack @the-old-hack.bsky.social · 25/07/2026@bretdevereaux.bsky.social 6075901615
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 26/07/2026Oh damn, a website and everything? Made by real people who haven't cooked their brains thinking about kids genitals and everything? 030
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 26/07/20265 bucks this is Evangelical crankery about porn 100
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 21/07/2026Best part of making pancakes is realizing that I've completely forgotten how to make pancakes. 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 21/07/2026I swear I'm not a bad cook, but every time I make pancakes it takes me a dozen tries to get one that wouldn't get me taken behind a Denny's and shot. 000
Reposted by Hammered MahlerChristopher Bird @mightygodking.com · 19/07/2026This one always makes me giggle 215612
Reposted by Hammered MahlerOregon 🕎🎲 @oregonthedm.bsky.social · 13/07/2026If you need a honking laugh 514243
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 05/07/2026If the police actually enforced firework bans it would be a good thing and also more people would hate cops. 021
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 05/07/2026Suburban cities like to say "use alternate transport" when all they really mean is "use someone else's parking lot." 000
Reposted by Hammered MahlerAngela Ziegler @a2ziegler.bsky.social · 19/06/2026relevant to an email i just got 2191503605
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 07/06/2026It's going to so funny for Galatzine when Sheep Detectives makes more money than He-Man 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 04/06/2026My biggest struggle with Dungeon Crawler Carl is that anytime I see the word "Scolopendra" it stunlocks my brain into singing it to the tune of "Sarasponda" and I don't learn anything about the lore. 100
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 28/05/2026Snooze wouldn't be worth it for no wait and half the price. IHOP tier food that's somehow one of our defining breakfast spots. 020
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 25/05/2026How do these people not notice this is clearly a different guy in every picture? 020
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 25/04/2026Had a dream that I opened my phone and found out It Happened and the mods deleted everyone but the people who were performatively weepy about it. 000
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 19/04/2026I misheard the closing narration on a nature documentary and was positive Jane Goodall had been assassinated by poachers in the 90s. 041
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 16/04/2026A weirdly large percentage of Bluesky has the exact "a movie should never show a bad person doing a bad thing without saying how bad it is" literacy problem they all complain about but for headlines/articles. 100
Reposted by Hammered MahlerA hot dog hollers @birdrespecter.bsky.social · 12/04/2026I’m sorry this item is like something that would come out of the song Big Rock Candy Mountain if it was instead written by medieval british peasants 10832
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 11/04/2026How can anyone not love living in a city? Every day you can look around and see someone having a day they'll think fondly of for the rest of their life. And you get to share that! For free! 100
Hammered Mahler @firstof6.bsky.social · 09/04/2026When I was in middle school, I managed to convince a bunch of my friends that 2/3 mountain dew to 1/3 chocolate milk was a primo beverage. 000
