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Elizabzth van Ofs

@elizabethvanos.com
1.5K followers 647 following 878 posts
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dr worldwide™️ @imanimosley.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
this will do more for opera than anything that any artistic director or general manager has ever done or thought to do. it’s literally just this simple. (@mayor.nyc.gov, call me, Brooklyn-born opera scholar, will travel!)
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Surprised Eel Historian, PhD @greenleejw.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Hildegard -- always a free thinker -- wondered if maybe* if baby eels came from the sea, & adult eels went back to sea, that it was possible that the ocean was where they got busy. Weird, right? She also thought they grew from eggs...another bold (and correct!) guess. 2/2
Meme. Photograph of an eel out of water, on wet sand. The eel is dark in color, and slick looking. Physically slick, not car-salesman slick. There are hints of white along the bottom; this is likely a silver eel, having made the color transition to survive in the deep ocean on it's way back home to the Sargasso. It's current coloration doesn't do much to disguise it on a beach, however.

I use this eel somewhat frequently in memes, because I love how grumpy it looks. It's DONE with all this. Tired of you, tired of fresh water, tired of frickin' herons. It's expression is that of a very harried middle-school librarian trying to impose quiet on a room full of 13 yr old boys on Ice Cream Day.

Meme text reads:
"A little privacy, please!"
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Surprised Eel Historian, PhD @greenleejw.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Friends! It's the feast day of St. Hildegard of Bingen, an abbess, polymath, mystic, & eel truth-teller. Medieval thinkers agreed that eels reproduce asexually. But Hildegard suggested that eels mate at sea, where we can't watch. No one listened to her. But she was right! 1/2 🗃️🧪
Meme. Painting of St. Hildegard, from the shoulders up. She is dressed up in her nunnish finery. Her wimple is white and very creased, so that she looks a bit like a mummy and her veil is the dusky black of that suggests it's been through the wash many times. She has something like a crown on her head, with little spikes that look for all the world like duck feet. The saint's eyebrows are hard lines like windshield wipers, & her nose is ski-jump smooth.

Her head is surrounded by a nimbus of blue with a white outline, set against an orange background. She is looking up and towards your right, as if she's watching a possum that's about to drop onto the person sitting next to you. Her mouth is set in a tight smile. She's likely thinking about sex again. And maybe not just eel sex.

Hildegard provided us with the first written description of the female orgasm, so it's quite possible that she's got that on her mind.

Meme text reads:
"Medieval Eel Truth:
It's all about the Bingen's, baby!"
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Jesse Raub @jesseraub.online · 08/09/2026
PEOPLE WITH LIBERAL ARTS DEGREES: so while i see there is utility to the system, i’m more or less morally opposed to their current constructs and have big concerns over the business structure and environmental impact WEB CODER: so i met God today,
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 04/09/2026
The way instrumentalists who cannot count cannot phrase and cannot listen act like they are "musicians" in front of me is hilarious
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 02/09/2026
that's my mayorrrrrrrrrr
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Amy Rae Hill @amyraehill.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
You ever read one of the classics that's pretty well-regarded and just think "man, this guy really hated women"
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Aparna Nair @disabilitystor1.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Make no mistake about this: this has always been part of RFK Jr's eugenicist agenda. It is entirely apace with his anti-vaccination beliefs (let children/the vulnerable fall sick, its good for the "population"). The goal is eugenics.
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Kategod 🐉🧿🦑𓅛🪬 @kategodart.northsky.social · 26/08/2026
we have thousands of potential dolly partons and tim curries already walking amongst us. most of them are begging for rent money or getting crushed at a shitty job
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Will McKinley @willmckinley.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
"It's given a lot of people permission to be themselves, to not dream it, be it, which is the motto of the movie, really. I would like to be remembered for that." Farewell to Tim Curry (1946-2026) #RIP
Tim in costume as Dr. Frank-N-Furter
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AFL-CIO @aflcio.org · 25/08/2026
Dolly Parton knew what it was like to struggle as she fought for working families her whole career. From providing free books to kids to giving working women our "9 to 5" anthem, she was an icon and an inspiration. Rest in power to our union sister. We will always love you.
A photo of Dolly Parton sitting at a desk and talking on the phone in a scene from the movie 9 to 5.
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Claire Willett @clairewillett.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
the thing is like public health child literacy civil rights social justice rural poverty once you personally have become rich and successful, those things only matter if you still have the capacity to care deeply about people outside your immediate circle and that is harder than becoming rich
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derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
trying to learn about audio equipment and intentionally looking for stores with one star reviews so i know the person at the shop is an enthusiast and not a businessperson
A Google review of an audio store reads: "Worst phone interaction I've ever had in my entire life. I called to ask if they had an electrostatic headphone amp, I was informed that it was a waste of money to own electrostatic headphones. Then I tried to say that I know a lot about headphones and own many and that I am just looking for an amplifier, but then I was interrupted and told that I don't know anything. Wild!"A Google review of an audio store reads: "I normally have tremendous empathy for the mentally ill but not with this guy. He's abusive, slanderous and bizarrely demanding -- and that's if he likes you. Maybe he can still repair stuff but I wouldn't know; I walked away after the third time he screamed at me for asking a simple question and that's no exaggeration. Actual screaming. Just wild."
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 07/08/2026
my wife can't do ibuprofen or advil, really, because for the years that her chrons and chronic migraine and many hospitalizations providers would roll their eyes and throw up their hands, and she ended up with ulcers and has to watch her liver function like a hawk.
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Tressie McMillan Cottom @tressiemcphd.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
people with chronic pain warned us at the time but the criminalization of women and minority people’s pain after the opioid crisis is a public health disaster. I’ve had friends denied pain management after hysterectomies, dental extractions and broken bones.
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Matthew Noe @noethematt.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
"Just go into trades" is not a real solution to this fucked up job market
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 29/07/2026
I just turned off fourteen separate categories of email notifications and I feel like I walked out of hell after being stuck in a bargain with the devil.
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Claire Willett @clairewillett.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
exCUSE me??????????? I take a week off and there’s a KIDNAPPING?!!?!????????
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 23/07/2026
heheheheheheehheeh
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Ryan Boyd @ryanboyd.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
Sorry to be Uncle Marxism but employer-based healthcare is a tool of social control for the ruling class
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Dr. Laci Brock 🪐 @stellerarts.com · 19/07/2026
behold, jimothy
Jimothy the raccoon carved by hand and stamped on paper in black ink. A purple flower and pink cheek is added in paint
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Louie Stowell @louiestowell.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
Everyone: medieval artists artists clearly never saw real animals? Jimothy: am I not a real animal?
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Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 17/07/2026
Here’s how we’re fighting rental ripoffs.
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Claire Willett @clairewillett.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
all right fam it's time for "Give Us This Day Our Daily Thread," in which your favorite internet lesbian breaks down what's new and hot in the world of Schism Watch 2026 please hydrate, stretch, and get a snack, we have a LOT to go over today
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Courtney Milan @courtneymilan.com · 07/07/2026
You aren’t putting him in jail. You’re just letting him continue on his perfectly fine life without being one of the hundred most powerful people in the country.
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Courtney Milan @courtneymilan.com · 07/07/2026
You do not have to give people “due process” before you choose not to vote for them. You can just be like “oh word the guy who wrote rape apologia and had allegations just got another serious allegation? Guess he doesn’t need to be my senator.”
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 04/07/2026
not to be salty on main but why do violinists have no green room etiquette?
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Brooke @brooklynmarie.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
This will be a thread of tips for people suffering through their first god-awful heat wave with no or subpar AC. I'm a perpetually broke Southern Californian so my ideas run cheap.
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Claire Willett @clairewillett.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
THE VATICAN IS CALLING IT A SCHISM I REPEAT HOUSTON, WE HAVE A SCHISM
Therefore, this Dicastery, in the faithful exercise of the functions entrusted to it, considers it necessary to state that this act constituted the delict of schism, with the canonical consequences for the sacred ministers and lay faithful involved. Indeed, as was already declared in 1988, "such disobedience-which implies in practice the rejection of the Roman primacy—constitutes a schismatic act" (cf. John Paul II, Apostolic Letter Ecclesia Dei, 3).
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Tyler King @tyleraking.com · 02/07/2026
Listen. I spent more than a decade as a theatrical technician, rigging stages, hanging lights, flying scenery, etc. The number of times I have dropped anything on a stage with performers on it is zero. The number of times I’ve dropped something that might’ve killed someone is zero. This is major.
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 29/06/2026
Sara almost died in the hospital over the weekend in true greys anatomy episode fashion, and do not recommend, don't ever try this. (They also asked if I was her "sister friend roommate cousin MOM and NEIGHBOR")
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 28/06/2026
Start your tbr with Decomposition Book, and then check out the list below!
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Queer Liberation Library @queerliblib.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
Your TBR (to be read) pile deserves a level up. Check out our full Libby Pride Guide tout suite. libbyapp.com/library/queerliblib/gu…
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 27/06/2026
this legitimately made me tear up. a tremendous public servant!
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taylor robin @taylor-robin.bsky.social · 26/06/2026
Wacom recently asked me to talk about why I make queer comics, and given there are multiple bills right now floating around in congress that are effectively "we will kill your livelihood if we get a sniff of queer" I had some pretty strong, simply feelings to relay.
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David Daut @davidmdaut.com · 23/06/2026
A "podcast" that is taped and released as video and features famous people is just a talk show that doesn't have to abide by union rules.
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Louisa @louisathelast.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
I resent the video-fication of podcasting. That's just a TV show. Podcasts aren't supposed to be for hot people. They have everything else
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🌅 Patricia Wallinga 🌇 @pwallinga.bsky.social · 15/06/2026
Male Baroque orchestra pinups. The world is a beautiful place
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Leena 🌵 @leena.reuben.games · 04/06/2026
eric adams just got a shiver down his spine and he doesn’t know why
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Rosemary @rosen-berry.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
I’m so excited to read this 😭 - love seeing other people loving it on Fable! @saramcclarinet.bsky.social
Decomposition Book by Sara van Os
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Turnaround Books @turnarounduk.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
Following a traumatic friend break-up, Savannah discovers Ava's body in the woods — along with a diary of her final days. Is Savannah losing her grip, or has she just found her new best friend?! Fans of Yellowjackets will LOVE 'Decomposition Book'! OUT NOW! buff.ly/kV0urai
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Sadie Hartmann (Mother Horror) @sadiehartmann.bsky.social · 26/04/2026
My ebook, audiobook, and physical reads right now and I’m quite obsessed with each one of them
Accumulation, A Forest Darkly, Decomposition Book— quite obsessed with all 3
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Lisa Cowan Pineo @lisacowanpineo.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
There's lots of horror books coming out in 2026 so I'll be posting a bunch each month. Here are the ones publishing in May. Book lists in ALT text. 1/2 #2026horror #horrorbooks #2026publication #maypublication #horror #bookpost #postseries #booksky #books
INTO THE DARKENING DUST by Katherine Silva
A VOW FOR BREAKING by L.M. Riviere
IN THE WAKE OF GODS by Kent Priore
THE HALLS OF THE DEAD by S.M. Hallow
ACCUMULATION by Aimee Pokwatka
BODY COUNT by Codie Crowley
SHE WAITS WHERE SHADOWS GATHER by Michelle Tang
DEATH'S DAUGHTER by S.A. Barnes
I KNOW A PLACE by Nat Cassidy
HONEY by Imani Thompson
NOT YOUR FINAL GIRL by Mikayla Randolph
THE COVE by Claire Rose
THE GIRL WITH A THOUSAND FACES by Sunyi Dean
THE LIBRARY AFTER DARK by Ande Pliego
BUT WON'T I MISS ME by Tiffany Tsao
NEON MOON by Grace R. Reynolds
SPIDER, SPIDER by L.C. Winter
INTERCEPTS by T.J. Payne
ONE LEG ON EARTH by 'Pemi Aguda
SOLACE HOUSE by Will MacleanHUNGER & THIRST by Claire Fuller
THE BUILD-A-MONSTER WORKSHOP by Pedro Iniguez
THE FALSE CHILD by L.M. Kaplin
MORI QUINN AND THE COFFIN GRAVE by S. Alessandro Martinez
THE WITCH OF TONGUES by S. Alessandro Martinez
IN THE BLOOD by April Henry
MUNTU by Eugen Bacon
ABYSS by Nicholas Binge
FEMME FERAL by Sam Beckbessinger
THE SAW MOUTH by Cale Plett
MAKE ME BETTER by Sarah Gailey
A DARK AND WILD WOOD  by Sarah Nicole Lemon
ELECTRIC SHAMANS AT THE FESTIVAL OF THE SUN by Mónica Ojeda
THE HOUSE OF WHISPERS by Tom Carter
WE DANCE UPON DEMONS by Vaishnavi Patel
THE BONE DOOR by Frances White
HUNGER by Choi Jin-Young
WE WERE NEVER REALLY FRIENDS by Timothy King
WHO'S SATAN INSIDE?: THE FINAL DESCENT - EXTREME HORROR ANTHOLOGY
NEW SKIN by Sarah WangKILLER SUMMER by Wendy Dalrymple
UNDER A CARNIVORE SKY by Brianna Jett
TRAD WIFE by Sarah Langan
WELCOME TO THE CHAOSKAMPF by Jane Flett
SAFE FOOD by Taylor Z. Adams
THE TEMPTATION OF CHARLOTTE NORTH by Camilla Bruce
AND SIDE BY SIDE THEY WANDER by Molly Tanzer
FILTH EATERS by Ito Romo
THE DORIANS by Nick Cutter
DECOMPOSITION BOOK by Sara van Os
UNTIL DEATH by Mary Berman
SOMETHING ON YOUR MIND by George Morris De'Ath
MAGICIAN by Tracy Lynne Oliver
SALOMÉ by Leslie Baird
VILLAIN by Natalie Zina Walschots
ALL US SAINTS by Katherine Packert Burke
CREEPSHOW ed. by Jame Aquilone
BOOKMAIL by Jason R. Davis
TEDDY BEARS NEVER DIE by Cho Yeeun
PREY by Graham Mulvein
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Reactor Magazine @reactorsff.bsky.social · 28/04/2026
"Don’t you remember? That summer of sixth grade when your mom was really big on the true crime documentaries and you got all obsessed with death." We're thrilled to share an excerpt from @saramcclarinet.bsky.social's irreverent horror Decomposition Book!
reactormag.com
Read an Excerpt From Decomposition Book by Sara van Os - Reactor
A woman finds a dead body and can’t give up its ghost…
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Jellybooks Ltd @jellybooks.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
New from @deadinkbooks.bsky.social 'Decomposition Book' by Sara van OS @saramcclarinet.bsky.social An emotional and darkly hilarious debutnovel about a woman who finds a dead body - ideal for fans of weird girl fiction. buy @foylesforbooks.bsky.social 📖 www.jellybooks.com/cloud_reader...
jellybooks.com
Sample of "Decomposition Book" by Sara van OS
Peek inside this book and discover another great read.
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Eleni Moros @elenimoros.bsky.social · 15/05/2026
Bright green
-seven husbands of Evelyn Hugo
-mostly Human Resources
-rich people problems
-scum villains self serving system 
-Percy Jackson
-sea of charms
-sun eater trials
-killing stalking
-dogs boss and other things I’ve cried about
Cotton candy or as blue as my hair as even gotten
-American roommate experiment
-dick fight island
-love hypothesis
-daughter of the moon goddess
-this is how you lose the time war
-circling back to you
-girl who fell beneath the sea
-my love mix up
-spin the dawn
-very secret society of irregular witchesNatural brown
-shroom for improvement
-shield of sparrows
-trial of the sun queen
-Circe
-invisible life of Addie LaRue
-decomposition book
-legends and lattes
-dungeon crawler Carl
-girl with a thousand facesGetting the itch to dye my hair again… which vibe did you like best?!
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Scarlett Harris @scarletteharris.bsky.social · 17/05/2026
Book 77: Decomposition Book by @saramcclarinet.bsky.social
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Emily @emilymarie82.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
Happy Publication Day to the amazing @saramcclarinet.bsky.social for her new work, Decomposition Book!! I am currently reading this now and I am completely bewitched by it 💗
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Elizabzth van Ofs @elizabethvanos.com · 21/05/2026
This is today 7pm. Be there!
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