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The Living Man Bill Ferris

@billferris.bsky.social
1.1K followers 405 following 2.9K posts

I write things and make training courses. Chapel Hill-adjacent.

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Reposted by The Living Man Bill Ferris
🔪🔪🔪bryan 🔪 🔪 🔪 @murderxbryan.bsky.social · 1h
My wife and daughter hate it when I say I’m gonna kill myself while waiting at a restaurant so I said I was gonna kill the guy in front of me in line and they don’t like that either, someone has to die
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 3h
I've never played these games or seen these movies but this is excellent
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 6h
It's sad that this man has never known the joys of driving 4 hours with your friends to see your favorite band
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 20h
Name? Guy Bunting. Occupation? Guy bunting.
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Cheer Captain @cheercaptain.wang · 21h
Temple of the Dog - “Hunger Strike”
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 20h
Three-cueing strikes again
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Barbie Girl, Interrupted @leesha.bsky.social · 21h
knock 'em up, Socrates
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 21h
Let the record show that the senator does not know ball. I yield my time.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
One of life's great indignities is having to buy a trash can. Yeah, I'm going to spend a hundred bucks on a special jail in my house for all the slop I want out of my life.
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Reposted by The Living Man Bill Ferris
The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
A falcon swoops down upon Liberty Biberty believing it has snared an easy meal for its hungry brood. Moments later, it drops the accursed thing, glad to be rid of its unclean yellow hairs in its talons. Even the falcon, forever susceptible to the vicissitudes of the wild, has never been THAT hungry.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
One thing almost all good flags have in common is that a child could draw a recognizable version of it from memory
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
A falcon swoops down upon Liberty Biberty believing it has snared an easy meal for its hungry brood. Moments later, it drops the accursed thing, glad to be rid of its unclean yellow hairs in its talons. Even the falcon, forever susceptible to the vicissitudes of the wild, has never been THAT hungry.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Today I saw an inexplicable t-shirt at breakfast: "FUCK BEEF JERKY. GIVE ME WEED." Does anyone have any insight into this perplexing series of words and fashion choices?
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 02/01/2024
We need another big guy who's not afraid of going after the bad guys. It's time for Mitchell: The Series.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
I am the lowest of the low. I put on my pants 0.78 legs at a time
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
What's the stupidest reason you've ever disliked a pro athlete? For me, I didn't like Josh Allen for a number of years because I think the number 17 looks ugly on a jersey.
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Peter @notalawyer.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
a lot of people act like there's a trade being offered where we give up trans athletes in sports and in exchange fascism is defeated forever
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Liberty mutual commercials are the Heathcliff comics of college football
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
For thousands of years, mystics have been attracted to strange artifacts
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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
It’s very important to know you can just tell them their questions are dumb. It’s what Trump does! He’s been very successful at it! The media decided to stop asking actual important things to him because of it!
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
They're adding another character to the liberty mutual cinematic universe, a horrible little goblin named leebo who keeps trying to eat the emu. Nobody's sure what his deal is.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Midwestern security consultant firm called OPESEC
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Kylie Eleison @gonebabygone.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Ultimately the main reason not to meet MAHA halfway is because it's not an actual policy agenda, it's an elaborate excuse to turn HHS into a makework program for YouTubers named Da Health Uncle
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Got 805 points in today's outlier puzzle, with 6 finds nobody else had, highest word score was 92 playoutlier.com/s/VNX9FW
playoutlier.com
OUTLIER · Day 114
billferris scored 805 on Day 114. Can you beat them?
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Websites used to treat you properly. Now every site immediately hassles you to sign up for their mailing list to save 10% on products you haven't even looked at yet. To opt out, you have to click a button that says like, "No, I'm a dumbass who likes paying full price." Humiliating.
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Luke O'Neil @lukeoneil47.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
I just have concerns about girls sports
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Ed Zitron @edzitron.com · 10/09/2026
I am serious that today’s journalism ecosystem would be fooled if they played war of the worlds on the radio. It would be on CNN within hours
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Using my compass and protractor to draw a pentagram and a pentacle in Baphometry class
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Only an idiot would use a premise that everybody knows and loves
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Nathan Fielder: Tell me the name of God you fungal piece of shit

Elizabeth Holmes: can you feel your heart burning? Can you feel the struggle within? The fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. You cannot kill me in a way that matters.
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David_j_roth @davidjroth.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
I received all of these checks. They changed my life, and made it possible for me to start the business I'd always dreamed of (AI-generated scam phone calls targeting elderly people). Donald Trump showed up for ME.
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Anil Dash @anildash.com · 09/09/2026
There are a lot of people who think their parents got their brains destroyed by Fox News, but somehow they’re not getting their brains destroyed by staying on Twitter.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
I might be misremembering, but I feel like this year has had an uncommonly long pre-911 buildup. Like, people are counting down the days like it's Christmas
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Ian Rennie @theangelremiel.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Nathan Fielder and Elizabeth Holmes doing the "we're just normal men" meme
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Every elementary school had the kid who liked to brag that they learned 19 different ways to kill you in taekwondo
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
🎶 At the Buca Buca di Beppo 3 great locations across Ohio🎶
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
There's no way to say this without sounding insane: There's a certain innocuous topic I have no interest in but I will occasionally talk to myself about it around the house or in the car just to see if my phone or other devices are listening and I start getting targeted ads for it.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
I don't think the lawsuit will work but they are right to file it. When you're telling fans that the stadium clock they can see with their own eyes is inaccurate and the REAL clock is somewhere in Chicago accessible only by conference officials, you've lost the plot.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
It's a beautiful day to rewire my guitar for the 19th time
A red Stratocaster with the pickguard removed. The pickguard is upside down and you can see all the electronics and the ham-fisted soldering job that I did.
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Nathan Fielder moving ahead of Eric Andre and Sacha Baron Cohen in the "real-life version of the Joker" rankings
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
I can't decide if she's too dumb to realize that what she's really doing is participating in a right-wing push to shut down the WNBA
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
It's not the best headline, but the best sub headline is from this one: God Answers Prayers Of Paralyzed Little Boy ‘No,’ Says God
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
This is the same chicken
A penguin with a red rubber glove on his headA penguin without a red rubber glove on his head
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Kidney stones be like
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
I've got that kind of ADHD that makes going for a half hour run take 3 hours
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Lenny from The Simpsons saying, "that's our homer!"
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Idiot Kitchen @idiotkitchen.bsky.social · 11/03/2026
Love blimps. So nice to see a plump airship heave fatly through the sky
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Patrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 04/09/2026
Calling it now: future Republican congressman www.tmz.com/2026/09/04/m...
tmz.com
Man Gets Duct Taped to Seat on Flight After Allegedly Making Racist and Anti-Gay Remarks
11:14 AM PT -- A spokesperson for American Airlines tells TMZ ... "On Sept. 3, ​American ​Airlines ​flight 618 diverted to Baltimore ​(BWI) ​due to a disruptive customer. Upon arrival, law ​enforcemen...
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
"vibe shift" I say as I change the direction of the toilet paper roll
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The Living Man Bill Ferris @billferris.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Should honestly put it on Netflix under the label of "perfectly fine, mostly inoffensive thing you can have on in the background while visiting your parents"
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