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Alan Wood

@alanwood.me
189 followers 250 following 355 posts

Bassist etc. Grapefruitmoon on the other place and elsewhere. Professionally I skiddle about with Microsoft data products. Everything else I do unprofessionally.

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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 04/10/2026
There's a fairly high end garden centre near me that has an entire section of Highland cow framed print AI sold at extortionate prices. Awful.
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Captain Howdy @captainhowdy.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
A Happy #DayOfDredd to all who celebrate.
The album cover for 'Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band' by The Beatles, except the Fab Four and their cardboard friends have been replaced by Judge Dredd and his impressive gallery of allies and enemies. No, I'm not going to name all of them, and yes, while it is quite possible that the character you really like isn't in there, I make no apology for their absence. Batman, Predator, Alien and The Biker Mice From Mars are all missing because I wanted this to be a tribute to Rebellion.
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Micah @rincewind.run · 02/10/2026
getting mad at the pope for not thinking the chatbot has a soul is easily the funniest thing I've read all week
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 27/09/2026
Really BBC Sport? You can't even get this right on the Women's Football page?
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Michael Bazemore @deepwatermike.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Remember this shit next time some billionaire or billionaire's lickspittle warns about class war. There's never not been one, and they wage it openly against us.
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Sara Gibbs @sararoseg.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
He imposed Shania Law
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Gayle Raaaargh-mage @mealygarage.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
As an indie author it's hellish trying to promote myself as I'm pants at it. I'm proud of JOCKULA, though, so please consider reposting this so more fans of horror comedy fiction can be made aware of the book. Thank you.🙏
Promo image for the book JOCKULA. Includes reviews:

"Jockula delivers laugh-out-loud horror with a scottish soul and an unexpectedly tender heart... the funniest vampire novel to come out of Scotland since... well, ever." - Ginger Nuts of Horror.

"Having always been fascinated by vampire lore, this is a fun addition with original ideas... a nice breezy pace, has a great style, and Ramage certainly knows her pop culture references." - Amazon Review.

"Jack Rushton is instantly likeable: foul-mouthed, funny, self-pitying, loyal, and far more human than he wants to admit." - Amazon Review.

www.gayleramage.co.uk/jockula.
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Gwyllm Llwydd @gwyllm.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 24/09/2026
If it was a teenager that was hacking government IT systems, they'd be immediately arrested and then be serving a very long prison sentence. Lets see the AI bros suffer the same fate.
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Dr. Aaron Thierry @thierryaaron.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
1/ People keep saying AI is inevitable. History disagrees. Plenty of technologies were called unstoppable, and societies stopped them or shrank them down to a niche. A thread 🧵
evitable
adjective
uk  /ˈev.ɪ.tə.bəl/ us  /ˈev.ə.t̬ə.bəl/

able to be avoided or prevented:
He believes that world war is evitable.
Inevitable suffering due to persecution is to be distinguished from evitable sickness.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 22/09/2026
Could not agree more. Well said.
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Ben @dataferrytales.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
This is a generalisation, however, the data industry is an embarrassment. The willingness we have displayed to relinquish our knowledge, skills, and critical thinking is worrying at best, but closer to truly pathetic. I'm struggling to comprehend how bad it has become in such a short space of time.
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Abilu Tangwa. @abilutangwa.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Stop calling it a climate problem. Call it what it is: organized greed. The planet isn’t dying. It’s being killed for profit. The killers have names. And boardrooms. #ClimateJustice #StopEcocide
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Gillian Martin @gillmartin.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Laura Kuennsberg on the BBC Politics Show asked whether musicians should speak out on political subjects... Woody Guthrie, ladies & gentlemen:
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Eamonn-Forde @eamonn-forde.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Oh, Viz.
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Dare Obasanjo @carnage4life.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
These are the AI risks we should be worried about and legislating against not freaking out over whether some poorly sandboxed security test leads to Skynet.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 20/09/2026
Another guy who thinks height is an achievement.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 18/09/2026
Oh no, I absolutely loved her.
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Andy Dawson @andydawson.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
England 2026. Volunteers who save people from dying in the sea are being repeatedly attacked by an organised group who very much want people to die in the sea. England 2026.
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Nicolas Hénin @nicolashenin.net · 17/09/2026
Nice campaign by the Norwegian Consumer Council about the declining lifespan of products. Enjoy!
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 17/09/2026
Agreed, it was outstanding.
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Alex Andreou @sturdyalex.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
All day Piddington's womminfolk have been telling news how they will be terrified of "hundreds of young men nearby, free to come and go as they please." NOT ONE JOURNALIST has asked: "How did you cope when it was an army base? Who came and went then? Nuns?" Soon as you ask that, all becomes clear.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 16/09/2026
But what currency will they use?
bbc.co.uk
Piddington in Oxfordshire votes to leave UK over asylum plans
Piddington residents vote over proposals to house up to 1,256 male asylum seekers nearby.
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Mark Hebden @unionlib.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Scotland: We want to leave the UK BBC: Huh? Wales: We want to leave the UK BBC: What? Northern Ireland: We want to leave the UK BBC: Lolz Some shithole in Oxfordshire: We want to leave the UK because racism BBC: REPORT THE HELL OUT OF THIS #Piddington
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 12/09/2026
Back in from playing a gig at a festival and watching some great local bands. Just in time to see the last couple of games of the US Open, great to see Rybakina win.
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Katie Hinde @mammalssuck.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
"The whole “Oh no, our models went rogue” thing … When a bridge collapses, you don’t analyze whether the bridge was ethical or sentient or why it decided to collapse. You ask, who is the person who built this bridge to be so flimsy?" www.wired.com/story/one-of...
wired.com
One of AI’s Fiercest Critics Says All the Doom Talk Is ‘Meant to Distract Us’
Timnit Gebru argues that AI companies are stoking fears of extinction to avoid discussing actual harms, like autonomous weapons.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 12/09/2026
I get that 2FA is a "good thing", but I hate having to be forced to have my phone at hand all the time. I'd like some separation please!
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 11/09/2026
My Duolingo streak is 2625 days but I think I'm done with it. It's become a chore rather than something fun.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 11/09/2026
"But the Cabinet Office - the part of government which leads on AI safety - said the UK "cannot simply turn AI off"." - Yes you can. It's really easy. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
bbc.co.uk
UK government rejects 'kill switch' idea for dangerous AI
The Cabinet Office, which leads on AI safety, says the UK "cannot simply turn AI off".
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Zack Whittaker @zackwhittaker.com · 09/09/2026
Watching this Apple event tout how iPhones will soon be able to record ambient audio/conversations and transcribe "high level notes" for you. It's billed as private and end-to-end encrypted, but I think the bigger harm is the normalization of always-listening devices. It's creepy and not normal.
a screenshot from an iPhone and Apple Watch showing "recaps" of conversations from ambient audio.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 07/09/2026
Best B-sides band ever. I used to buy all the CD singles for them.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 07/09/2026
I assume you've already visited the relatively new vinyl shop by now?
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Memorial Device @memorialdevice.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
'No arrests made'. They have been completely emboldened. And we know how this works: they will do it again. In greater numbers. A catastrophic and far-reaching failure of policing.
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Barry Burns @barry.mogwai.scot · 30/08/2026
Get Scottish government to change all the road names around Trump’s golf courses to things like Canada Street, Epstein Way, Iran Road. Fuck it
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Neil Mackay @neilmackay.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
I can't believe this London-based landowner is putting the iconic Glenelg to Skye ferry at risk. Support the local community - not millionaire financiers - and save the world famous Glenelg to Skye ferry by joining me and signing the petition today: you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/sa...
you.38degrees.org.uk
Save the Glenelg - Skye ferry!
This ten minute crossing is famous around the world - and is believed to be the last turntable style ferry anywhere. It's an iconic part of Skye's history, but it's under threat thanks to a wealthy la...
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Neil Mackay @neilmackay.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Well, you know what to do then, America - get on with it please
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George Monbiot @georgemonbiot.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
I know this isn't terrorism. You know this isn't terrorism. The authorities know this isn't terrorism. But, once again, they have labelled protesters "terrorists", as part of the long-running programme to ensure that no one dares protest about anything any more. www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2026...
theguardian.com
Seven charged with damaging Trump’s Scottish golf course accused of ‘terrorist connection’
Course at Donald Trump’s Turnberry resort was painted with words ‘Gaza is not 4 sale’ and clubhouse was sprayed with graffiti
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 27/08/2026
Great wee pub! Only been the once but loved it.
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Eoghan Daltun 🌍 @irishrainforest.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Such a common sight in eateries, and so problematic on multiple levels. The terrible damage that animal-based foods like pork do to natural ecosystems and to human health, and then on top of all that, gross waste. It's obscene. A symptom of a society totally out of touch with physical reality.
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HappyToast @happytoast.co.uk · 25/08/2026
I hope the billionaires and fascists are looking at the rich outpouring of love and admiration and realising how they can never have that with the route they've chosen.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 25/08/2026
RIP Dolly. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say she was one of the greatest ever Americans. What a legacy.
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Dr. Michael MacKay @michaelmackay.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
From now on, Canadians will refer to the United States as Epstein Island.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 25/08/2026
That shawarma is the best!
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Neil Mackay @neilmackay.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
So what are the benefits of being an American? Having some madman murder your kids at school? Being murdered yourself at work by a madman? Being murdered by ICE in your own street? Dying because you’ve no health cover? Dying from the shit in your food? Wake up America. You are treated like peasants
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 22/08/2026
Finally got around to starting The Left And The Lucky yesterday. Engrossed already. Willy Vlautin is such a great writer.
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 21/08/2026
I bought it when I was 11. It inadvertently taught me loads and still does!
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Alan Wood @alanwood.me · 20/08/2026
I'm not looking forward to getting there. Was a nightmare for gigs last year.
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Pilot @pilotbeer.co.uk · 20/08/2026
Pretty excited about our upcoming rebrand as we’ve hired the absolute genius who came up with the phrase “working royals”.
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Smooth Dunk @smoothdunk2.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
The British Media Vs. Plagiarism
4 panel comic

Panel 1: 
British Journalists are relaxing on lilos in the sea. Someone on the shore yells “Hey Guys! An academic got accused of plagiarism”

Panel 2: 
One of the journalists sticks out their tongue and says “Pffft. Wake me when there’s a real story”

Panel 3: 
Person on shore “He was black”

Panel 4: 
The sea explodes as a tidal wave of British Journalists erupt into the air, manic and desperate to report on this now vital for some reason piece of news
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