iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 14/05/2026

surely the next post scolding people about still being on twitter will be the one that brings Elon musk’s empire crashing down

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Reposted by Ian

kate @katewitko.bsky.social · 26/03/2026

i love gen xers because they are legally obligated to identify themselves as such so it makes it easy to immediately disregard the rest of the post and move on with your life

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 18/12/2025

hopefully David Blaine can make the allegations disappear.

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 24/10/2025

your 🫵 mother is so fat she is scientifically classified as megafauna

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 16/10/2025

I would like to have no arms or legs or head or torso or mind or spirit or soul

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 13/10/2025

saw a bumper sticker of Calvin pissing on the words “breast cancer.” real shame to see people still believing in urine therapy in 2025.

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 08/10/2025

my Reddit karma’s in the goddamn toilet! fuck!

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 28/09/2025

if the medbed can’t grow your dick bigger I really don’t gaf

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 23/09/2025

If you’re in line to get raptured STAY IN LINE

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 19/09/2025

this is a whole thread but I thought he slipped up and posted his ghatgpt prompt

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 22/08/2025

idle hands are the devils workshop which is why I masturbate as often and as long as I can

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tinybaby @tiny.baby · 20/08/2025

everything going on has changed my mind pretty firmly: we should be discriminating against Christians

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 19/08/2025

The philosopher Plato once said there’s no such thing as a free labubu

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 20/05/2025

made a batch of chocolate chip cookies last night that have to chill until thursday evening… feeling like a bene gesserit… my plans are measured in centuries…

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Reposted by Ian

QuoProQuid @quoproquid.bsky.social · 19/05/2025

one of my interests is shirley temple's 1967 congressional race, which she entered with millions of dollars and higher name recognition than the pope, and lost because she was really off-putting and campaigning as a viciously pro-war candidate at the exact moment the war was becoming a big liability

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 15/04/2025

Save me $300 Lego Star Wars Jango Fett’s Starship… save me

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 26/03/2025

Tommy was right. Sometimes a day is a cromulent fuckcrustable. Sometimes you do needy drinky.

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 18/03/2025

chopping J*mes C*rv*lle into little wet chunks with a sharp axe and feeding the chunks to a large herd of alligators 👈💯🤞✊👍

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Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @dumbmike.bsky.social · 09/03/2025

SUPERMODEL: Wow his rib cage is shaped like a milk crate that got stored too near a gas water heater. He'd be perfect if only he also had pieces of broken plastic in his penis. ELON MUSK: Silence heifer. I am "intellimaxxing" by concentrating on the largest number that can fit in a single digit: 9.

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 10/01/2025

Yes, everybody’s going to need a witness, everybody’s going to need a little backup in case the scene gets nasty

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 17/12/2024

saw on the news people were hearing a strange drone in New Jersey. yeah turns out it was your mother in law’s voice

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 16/12/2024

the closest theater playing Queer is 80+ miles away fuck my Pennsylvania chungus life

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 10/12/2024

Donald trump speaking huttese Donald trump speaking fluent huttese Donald trump floors rodian bartender in Jabba’s palace by ordering bantha milk in fluent huttese

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 09/12/2024

Here’s why it’s time for a critical reevaluation of Jack and Jill (2011)

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 09/12/2024

Toilets should have a built in scale so you can measure your morning steamer

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 09/12/2024

after Andor season two I’d love to see Tony Gilroy tackle a live action remake of rogue one

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 04/12/2024

They’re calling him the first guy to post his Spotify wrapped on bluesky

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 03/12/2024

Feels like no one drinks birch beer anymore. Goated soda in my opinion.

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 03/12/2024

I really never want more than four ounces of soda at any time. Hell most days I could make do with three

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 02/12/2024

crazy that we had a president named Zachary

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 02/12/2024

some guys realized they were gay walking through the underwear aisle at American eagle some guys realized they were gay looking at the hot dads on the packaging of the big inflatable pools at Walmart

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 26/11/2024

pausing It Comes at Night 45 minutes in. what a heartwarming story!

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 25/11/2024

I would not thrive in an empty man situation. I’d be freaking out and going crazy

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Ian @nocoffinplease.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

*laganja doing standup on arrakis* now the desert here is very dry *pointing to reverend mother gaius helen mohiam* almost kinda like your vagina

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