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Marty Shambles

@martyshambles.bsky.social
303 followers 344 following 210 posts

Writer-in-residence and poetry editor @bloodhoneylit.bsky.social Writer at @ggtribune.com and @hwoodtimes.com martyshambles.com

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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Just remember that reading isn’t to be enjoyed, it’s a competition to see who’s the best person
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The Hollywood Time$ @hwoodtimes.com · 30/06/2026
Louis C.K. Required to Have His Hands Visible at all Times During New Netflix Special Scoop by @brettskalicky.bsky.social www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/louis...
hwoodtimes.com
Louis C.K. Required to Have His Hands Visible at all Times During New Netflix Special — Hollywood Time$
Louis C.K. will be required to have his hands visible at all times during the taping of his newest stand-up comedy special. I caught up with Ted Sarandos and Greg Peters, the Co-CEOs of Netflix, on th...
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
We can’t afford it but a country with a gdp $30 trillion less can afford it? Okay 🙄
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
Your grandma is still posting memes of trump and Putin being gay together and it’s super embarrassing. You should have a talk with her.
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
It’s so good when families are kicked out of their homes they’ve lived in for decades to make room for an artisanal cupcake shop
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Culture Dumpster @culturedumpster.com · 25/06/2026
Returning guest, @bosh.worstpossible.world joins the show this week to discuss one of our favorite games of 2026! Bungie's Marathon.
patreon.com
Marathon (2026) with Josh Boerman | Culture Dumpster
Josh Boerman of The Worst of All Possible Worlds and Ill Conceived returns to the show to discuss one of our favorite games of 2026 and perh
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
It’s eerie how SpaceX stock followed the same path as its rockets
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The Hollywood Time$ @hwoodtimes.com · 25/06/2026
Take a break from scrolling and show our contributors some love. go.bsky.app/8KgYXKo
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
Who put the cat in the bag to begin with?
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
If Vance resigned at any point resistance libs would have him as the democratic nominee for president faster than you can say “big tent”
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
I’m a Sylvando ally how bout you
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
It’s depressing how few people will see Angels in America because it sounds too much like Angels in the Outfield
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Johnny @doctorvenkman.com · 22/06/2026
Dumpsterheads are eating good the rest of June: First, @garbados.myatproto.social returns to @culturedumpster.com, this time to discuss the award winning classic sci-fi novel "The Left Hand of Darkness" by Ursula Le Guin.
patreon.com
Book Club 002: The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula Le Guin with Diana | Culture Dumpster
Friend of the show Diana returns to talk about one of the 20th century's most influential sci-fi novels, and the first novel written by a wo
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The Hollywood Time$ @hwoodtimes.com · 22/06/2026
Alamo Drafthouse Removing All Theater Seating www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/alamo...
hwoodtimes.com
Alamo Drafthouse Removing All Theater Seating — Hollywood Time$
Alamo Drafthouse is removing all theater seating from all 50 of their locations, to better serve their patrons’ moviegoing experience.
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Nick Coffman @nickcoffman.com · 21/06/2026
Happy Father’s Day to all the single moms out there.
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The Hollywood Time$ @hwoodtimes.com · 21/06/2026
George R.R. Martin Vows to Finish ‘House of the Dragon’ Discourse Before Starting ‘A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms’ Discourse Scoop by @peterferrarese.bsky.social www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/georg...
hwoodtimes.com
Martin Vows to Finish HotD Discourse Before Starting A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms Discourse — Hollywood Time$
From a bush outside of George R.R. Martin’s house in Santa Fe, New Mexico, I can now confirm that the fantasy author has made a solemn vow to finish the online House of the Dragon discourse before he ...
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GG TRIBUNE @ggtribune.com · 20/06/2026
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🔪🔪🔪bryan 🔪 🔪 🔪 @murderxbryan.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
There is a guy standing on the corner by my building selling shirts that say “who ate all the pussy?” By screaming “Who ate all the pussy?” Love that guy
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
I hate this nerd shit.
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GG TRIBUNE @ggtribune.com · 20/06/2026
Get your purple lights ready because we're getting woke and gay! Next Saturday from 7 pm - 11 pm EST, we'll be streaming some woke and gay games on Twitch to raise money for Trans Lifeline!!!! twitch.tv/ggtribune
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GG TRIBUNE @ggtribune.com · 19/06/2026
Kirby Accidentally Inhales Make-A-Wish Kid ggtribune.com/2026/06/19/k...
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
I guess I’m writing horror flash today. Seems like a fun use of time
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 18/06/2026
Obama was the best president of my lifetime, which is not praise for Obama, but a condemnation of my lifetime
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The Hollywood Time$ @hwoodtimes.com · 18/06/2026
Jay Leno Struck and Killed By Auto-Transporter and All 8 Cars on Auto-Transporter www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/jay-l...
hwoodtimes.com
Jay Leno Struck and Killed By Auto-Transporter and All 8 Cars on Auto-Transporter — Hollywood Time$
From a bush outside of Jay Leno’s personal garage, I can now confirm that the longtime late-night host died in a horrific accident involving an auto-transporter truck and all eight vehicles the truck ...
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 16/06/2026
www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/elon-...
hwoodtimes.com
Elon Musk to Get Pickle Rick Surgery — Hollywood Time$
The world’s funniest man announced Monday that he will do another hilarious thing. “I-I’m Pickle Elon. I’m Pickle Elon.” Elon Musk announced at a press conference, flanked by a team of doctors.
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GG TRIBUNE @ggtribune.com · 16/06/2026
Retro Review: I Loved Barbie: Secret Agent but Could Have Done Without the MKULTRA Subplot ggtribune.com/2026/06/16/r...
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The Hollywood Time$ @hwoodtimes.com · 16/06/2026
Elon Musk to Get Pickle Rick Surgery Scoop by @martyshambles.bsky.social www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/elon-...
hwoodtimes.com
Elon Musk to Get Pickle Rick Surgery — Hollywood Time$
The world’s funniest man announced Monday that he will do another hilarious thing. “I-I’m Pickle Elon. I’m Pickle Elon.” Elon Musk announced at a press conference, flanked by a team of doctors.
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 16/06/2026
New article in @hwoodtimes.com ! Big thanks to @nickcoffman.com for working with me on it! www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/elon-...
hwoodtimes.com
Elon Musk to Get Pickle Rick Surgery — Hollywood Time$
The world’s funniest man announced Monday that he will do another hilarious thing. “I-I’m Pickle Elon. I’m Pickle Elon.” Elon Musk announced at a press conference, flanked by a team of doctors.
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phillip crymble @phillipcrymble.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
I'll be the American poet / whose loneliness, finally, is relevant Stephen Dunn
Because We Are Not Taken Seriously

Some night I wish they'd knock on my door, the government men, looking for the poem of simple truths recited and whispered among the people. And when all I give them is silence and my children are exiled
to the mountains, my wife forced to renounce me in public,
I'll be the American poet
whose loneliness, finally, is relevant, whose slightest movement ripples cross-country.
And when the revolution frees me, its leaders wanting me to become "Poet of the Revolution," I'll refuse and keep a list of their terrible reprisals and all the dark things I love which they will abolish.
With the ghost of Mandelstam
on one shoulder, Lorca on the other, I'll write the next poem, the one that will ask only to be believed once it's in the air, singing.
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
Listen I’m not a business guy. I don’t have business brain. I have writer brain. I’m not going to do business stuff for my books because that’s not my job
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Nick Coffman @nickcoffman.com · 12/06/2026
A little preview of today's Patreon exclusive.
“The hardest Comics Unleashed has ever made me laugh was when I discovered it was replacing Colbert,” said superfan Todd Pladd. “That said, as someone who has sadly seen every episode, I have to agree with the poll, 2017 through 2024 of Comics Unleashed is the best thing Byron Allen has ever done for TV.”
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GG TRIBUNE @ggtribune.com · 12/06/2026
Matt and Nick have learned they would make great cops. They won't become cops cause they have morals but they'd be great at it cause it's actually pretty easy. They are checking out The Big Hollow: 1982 WATCH NOW: youtu.be/M3wdHnVrPEo?...
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
Are you sure??
A sign on the side of the road that reads “no shortage of gas.”
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GG TRIBUNE @ggtribune.com · 11/06/2026
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
There’s a lit mag that touts itself as philosophical literature and all their posts are like sub Ron Paul guy circa 2005. This nameless magazine is my nightmare blunt rotation
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 09/06/2026
Sold another headline! Now I’ve gotta write the damn thing
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 08/06/2026
Gnosticism is pretty fucking cool
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 05/06/2026
I literally feel so gross when I think of Star Wars stuff. I don’t care how good andor is. It’s fucking gross
static.klipy.com
Luke Skywalker Screaming No! Star Wars Meme
ALT: Luke Skywalker Screaming No! Star Wars Meme
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
OpenAI’s new commercial is “just build things” after basically saying learning and getting good at something is a waste of time. No wonder these assholes are getting booed. Nobody wants to hear that human striving is useless
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Socialism for All (S4A) ☭ Intensify Class Struggle @socialismforall.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
with alt text
a light-skinned woman with short grey hair and large white glasses in a yellow shirt is smiling at the camera and holding up a black and white sign with a picture of a man pointing and the text, "they blame immigrants so you won't blame billionaires," while standing at a protest in an urban center near tall buildings
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🔪🔪🔪bryan 🔪 🔪 🔪 @murderxbryan.bsky.social · 03/06/2026
And the world heard the rallying cry “the things you hate are unchangeable and we don’t care!”
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Sarah Amero @sarahamero.bsky.social · 02/06/2026
The Bune has been making me cackle like the hag I am since its inception, and now I get to say I've written for them! Go to their Patreon and give them money please @ggtribune.com
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 03/06/2026
I had fun writing this
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 03/06/2026
I had fun writing this
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🔪🔪🔪bryan 🔪 🔪 🔪 @murderxbryan.bsky.social · 03/06/2026
Leaving the game early due to too much ice cream
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 02/06/2026
The billionaire cares about you. Doesn’t that make you feel warm and fuzzy?
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 02/06/2026
Healthcare is more important than books and I love books. Don’t let robber barons dictate what is possible for communities to achieve
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 02/06/2026
I’m watching Angels in America so that’s a Pride-y thing to do
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Dia VanGunten / Writer @pinkzombierose.bsky.social · 01/06/2026
🌹If not poets, then who? Lovers? Leavers? Our very own selves? We survive on beautiful lies. 🥀
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Marty Shambles @martyshambles.bsky.social · 01/06/2026
Typewriters don’t have inference costs
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