Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 28/05/2026nice try you fucking idiot, my cool amulet said you'd tell me that 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 21/05/2026why tf my genie say hes not a miracle worker to my wish I thought that was literally the point 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 28/12/2025bro my son is older than me fuck this stupid time loop bullshit 000
Reposted by Kageスキビディミク @thebrainrotgotme.bsky.social · 26/12/2025I'm lowkey highkey lowkey you know 0343
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 23/12/2025when a kid bullies my kid I dont get angry at them. I earn their trust with my skateboarding, then I whisper to them that the most fun they can have in life is to microwave rodents that they catch. the problem sorts itsself out 010
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 23/12/2025Every so often I get something I wanted when I was a kid, and have an out of body experience as I see that tiny part of me get happy and excited only to disappear under the sorrow of not being able to experience it when I was a child. Today's joke is a lovely knock knock joke about the jews. 000
Reposted by KageGreg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 21/12/2025i wish a motherfucker would (have a lovely day) 8281114
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 16/12/2025if his name wasnt Dafoe, spiderman wouldve had an easy first movie 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 12/12/2025I was called into HR for "illicit sexual activity in the workplace" and had to introduce them to my personal shoeshiner that works under my desk 010
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 28/11/2025Ive been losing my hearing for the past year that Ive been practicing guitar and I really think Im sounding much better 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 28/11/2025Kids these days are too soft. When I was my nephews age (8yo), I could pick my dad up and spin him like a pizza. 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 30/04/2025too many parents are like "dont do drugs, dont have sex, dont drink irresponsibly" bro they tryna turn us into fuckin losers 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 25/03/2025hey gang we need something bigger than an inch for the imperial metric system does anyone have any ideas that doesn't involve their fucking fetish? jeff: hear me out on this one 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 05/03/2025Mob boss: Hey go take care of that guy. Me: Ok I was under the impression that you hated him though, maybe just tell him how you really feel 000
Reposted by Kagespooky glue @delightedbutdying.bsky.social · 11/02/2025Whenever you get weaker, I grow stronger 0151
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 05/02/2025lol my local miniatures shop thinks im a huge dnd nerd but im just picking up a lot of d4s to use as caltrops 010
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 05/02/2025you wouldn't even be able to recognize if Scatman was having a stroke 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 05/02/2025i taught my cat to get me cigarettes but the local stores all ask him for his id now. 010
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 05/02/2025if you dont get it im with u. i dont get anything cuz bad brane 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 05/02/2025yall going on about alt text but i want a picture with every text post cuz readings hard 000
Reposted by KageTwin Dad @twinsurvivalist.bsky.social · 04/02/2025Me: *shaking maracas wildly* Interviewer: I meant how do you handle stress at work? Me: *shakes maracas more wildly* 635291
Reposted by KageNate @thenatewolf.bsky.social · 04/02/2025“HEY! ARE YOU INVENTING NEW KINDS OF NOODLES IN THERE?” my father bellows as he bangs against the door. I want to hide my research but there isn’t time. Instead, my fingers grip the handle of the fire poker. Tonight we will learn who the future belongs to. We will learn who owns the family name. 1675
Reposted by KageLux Enjoyer @luxenjoyer.com · 04/02/2025Shampoo for my real friends and real poo for my sham friends. 1127527
Reposted by KageNappy Dolemite @nappydolemite.bsky.social · 03/02/2025If you're having trouble thinking of a Valentine's Day gift, just dump them. 28312
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 03/02/2025can i have a little butler yet or is that just for the morbidly rich?? 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 02/02/2025If I was a tree that could talk Id be a real prick to everyone 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 31/01/2025every time you go to the bathroom is an opportunity for a 3-pointer 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 30/01/2025the first rule of connecting my wifi is you gotta forget everything you know about english, itll only slow you down 010
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 29/01/2025cant wait for them to invent a coffee thats not delicious 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 29/01/2025spreading misinformation on x so i can come on here and be honest. i pooped 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 29/01/2025i aint have anyone interact with my posts for a month can i get some haters or something 000
Reposted by KageFrances: Meh and Loving It @francesmeh.reviews · 29/01/2025potato potahto tomato tomahto however you say it i’m still gonna fuck it 712228
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 29/01/2025i wont sleep with a man for 20$ but i might for a large pizza 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 29/01/2025didnt ask but i appreciate your interest and the time you invested in telling me that thing, stupid 000
Kage @kagewithak.bsky.social · 28/01/2025bro what is up with the power of bidets now, used one once and my ass has both a crack AND a hole in it 000
Reposted by KageCTRL ALT DASKEET @somedankinmycup.bsky.social · 27/01/2025Side hustles aren’t enough, I need front hustles and back hustles too . 2135
Reposted by KageCoach Rusty @coachrusty.bsky.social · 27/01/2025Hey I see you struggling and just want you to remember you can always do that somewhere more private 17735146
