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Paul HELLson

@humanolith.bsky.social
105 followers 366 following 768 posts

humanolith. stand-up tragedian. frenby. he/they. 💚

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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
www.bbc.co.uk/news/article... Can't believe this. Literally watched his match from Saturday night this morning. Also, BBC... it's PAC. Give the man his capital letters 💔
bbc.co.uk
Wrestler Benjamin Satterley, known as 'Pac', dies aged 40
His death was confirmed just a day after he participated in an AEW match in Chicago.
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
They call me the Shredded Iceberg, but not because I'm strong and cool and deep. It's because I'm washed and chopped
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Bethany Black @bethanyblack.bsky.social · 28/03/2025
Computer, Enhance. *spits tea*
Fluffles the poodle from Wallace and Grommit with her eyelashes, poodle ears and red hard hatThe cover of The Giver by Chappell Roan where she looks very similar
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
J.K. Rowl is a mouldy old soul, and a mouldy old soul is she. She hated the trans and she hated their fans, and now she's a full-blown nazi!
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Is it considered vegan to eat ghosts?
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
The holy sprout
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
At least they didn't put orange powder on anything
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I did get to keep it, btw. It now encompasses the work that used to be done by 3 separate people, but I'm sure I'll handle being extremely overworked with my usual aplomb
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alexis nedd @alexisthenedd.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
congrats to ed sheeran on his achievement
screenshot of an achievement from the game Disco Elysium. The achievement is titled "the world's most laughable centrist" for defending the political centre 7 times. 23.6% of players achieved this.
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Get to find out whether I can keep my job or not sometime in the next 24hrs. Gonna be a fun start to the weekend
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Luca Trenta @lucatrenta.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Turns out that if you are an old lady with a banner supporting Palestine, the government arrests you on charges of terrorism. If you are a masked white male thug bringing a national port to a standstill, the government does absolutely nothing, and the media covers it like some lads on a day out.
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Feel genuinely sick that there were racist protestors doing their hateful thing in my city last night. At least we can expect a full-throated and robust condemnation from our elected leaders, right?!
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DocHackenBOOOOOsh @dochackenbush.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Gen AI can eat my farts. #art #NoAI
Graphic line illustration of a human butt farting in a robots face. Text: I SUPPORT THE HUMAN ARTS. GEN AI CAN EAT MY FARTS.
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Oh god no
Cover of a magazine called "Senior's Guide to ChatGPT" in a supermarket checkout area
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Without saying your age, what is your favourite movie that came out when you were 20 years old
static.klipy.com
Kung Fu Hustle Palm Strike
Alt: Kung Fu Hustle Palm Strike
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
advertise your bluesky account with a simpsons gif
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Had an incredible time seeing Zach from @auntydonnaboys.bsky.social doing his solo stand-up show last night at Soho Theatre! It's a shame I can't tell you how good it was, on account of how you can't say anything anymore.
A view of a stage and audience. Projected onto the back wall it says 'ZACH' in big red letters.A view of a stage and audience. Projected onto the back wall it says 'COME' in big white letters (because it's actually the word 'comedy' scrolling past)
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Dishevelled. Wet. Still Proud.
An imbecile (me) pulls an odd face while sat on a train wearing a rainbow tie-dye t-shirt and facepaint in the colours of the non-binary flag.Two rainbow braids of fake hair and tinsel, and a non-binary flag coloured lei sitting on a folding table
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Finally got to play some more Big Walk and had an absolute hoot! Can't wait to pick up where we left off.
Screenshot from Big Walk. First person view of two blobby, big-eyed characters; one right in front of the camera holding a portable radio and one in the middle distance holding a torch with outstretched armsScreenshot from Big Walk. First person view of two blobby, big-eyed characters; both sat cross legged being illuminated by a large glowing ball that is held by the one on the rightScreenshot from Big Walk. First person view of two blobby, big-eyed characters; both on top of a tall green structure - one squints through binoculars while the other points a laser pointer at a distant objectScreenshot from Big Walk. First person view of two blobby, big-eyed characters; one is shouting through a megaphone while being held aloft by the other
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Matt "Matt "qwilman" Bixler" Bixler, aka qwilman @qwilman.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
she lived the life a good person lives when they find success. she's a huge part of the reason we got vaccines for covid. literal life saver thousands of times over.
usatoday.com
Fact check: Dolly Parton helped fund Moderna's COVID-19 vaccine research
A large donation made in April by Dolly Parton caught the attention of social media users after Moderna announced a promising new COVID-19 vaccine.
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Alex Zalben @azalben.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Dolly Parton, among a thousand other amazing things she did in her life, gifted over 330 million books to kids through her Imagination Library program. Her passing is a tremendous loss to the world, but you can support the program today to keep it going imaginationlibrary.com
imaginationlibrary.com
Dolly Parton's Imagination Library | USA, UK, IE, CA, AU
Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library is a book gifting program that mails free books to children from birth until they begin school in participating areas.
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Dolly was the only good rich person. We can start eating them now
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Genuinely overjoyed that it's raining. It's been so depressing seeing everything so sun-baked for so long.
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Finally got the chance to play Big Walk by @househouse.com after practically vibrating with excitement since it launched, and I can confirm that it's as fun as everyone says! 🥰
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852dude @852dude.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Bro. People are cool as fuck.
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Sophie Molly @sophiemolly.co.uk · 12/08/2026
😻😻😻
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It's Pipes, Mum! Pipes is here! @scriblit.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
the sun at least having enough decency to hide behind the moon a bit tomorrow, cause we're all fucking sick if it
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Bethany Black @bethanyblack.bsky.social · 01/02/2025
Remember to enjoy things, no matter how shitty things are, that shit’s more important than you can imagine, especially now
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
My place of work are forcing a bunch of us technicians to reapply for our jobs with some changes to make them worse, and a few of us are going to be let go whatever happens. I keep trying to work on my application but just looking at the document makes me feel so unbearably sad
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
Deli Too, my beloved. Gone since 2017ish. Still the best sandwiches I've ever had anywhere in the world. RIP 😢
The frontage of a sandwich shop in Portsmouth, UK in 2016. It's called 'Delicatessen Too'
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
My girl Bayley getting to lick a cheese & onion crisps, one of her favourite things to do
A black cat with white socks, standing on a bed licking a cheese & onion crisp
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
I feel this way about the Bondulance one. Don't know why. Just don't like it and can't help being disappointed by those that do. Lucky for them, my opinion is entirely worthless!
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
"Toothpaste isn't water" - 'Little' Alex Horne
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What The Trans?! 🏳️‍⚧️ @whatthetrans.com · 05/08/2026
REMEMBER The guidance coming into effect today doesn't dictate what you're allowed to do as an individual. It for service providers and business owners. Do not cower in fear, do not reduce yourself, do not isolate, that is one of the intended effects.
Photo taken at a protest, he background is tall old buildings of a city centre, a lightskined hand is holding a sign with a trans flag painted on it that says "fuck your "respect and clarity""
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
Monster Truck Platform Game Death Metal Laptop Wack (1984)
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
Lotta this going on today
A fake 'breaking news' style headline image. The picture is of Musk doing that n*zi salute he did twice, and the text says "BREAKING - Rich, evil dickhead says something infuriating that is categorically not news. We ensure you know all about the stupid thing this cunt said"
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
Looking like I'm going to lose my job at the end of the year, lxds. Anyone need a video editor/media producer?
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
How to do advertising right
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Kenny Logins @kennylogins.bsky.social · 25/08/2024
GREGGY @itmegreggy
[extremely Rammstein voice]
[screenshot of a google search with the autopopulated results of:

do
do hats
do hats fit]
9:34 AM • 2021-01-14
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
I can't believe the Odyssey movie is out so soon after the Galaxy movie
Poster for Super Mario Galaxy Movie
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Happy 15th of July!
Two panels from The Simpsons. In the first, Bart (wearing a plaster cast on his leg) reads to Lisa from a script: "Is it St Swithin's Day already?"
Then in the second panel: "T'is! replied Aunt Helga"
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Emma □ feet @scary-lil-emma.bsky.social · 13/07/2026
This is the Amnesty International report on the anti-rights groups. These anti-rights groups have immediately engaged in lawfare to bury this report. *be a shame if people kept sharing it. drive.google.com/file/d/1UggI...
drive.google.com
Report_-_A_growing_threat__the_anti-rights_movement_in_the_UK_July_2026.pdf
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Small Robots @smolrobots.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Happy International Non-Binary's People's Day from Nonbinarybot!
Nonbinarybot, an ovoid robot with banded arms and legs and a coiled antenna, holding up a card with the number 2 on it, waggling the fingers on its other hand spookily and making an 'ooo' face. It's shaded in soft colours, with metallic black legs, and the background is striped in the colours of the Non-Binary flag (horizontal yellow, white, purple, black). White text at the bottom reads, "nonbinarybot @smolrobots".
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Wonder if I can get a refund on my national express ticket because the THREE nearest people to me ALL took their shoes and socks off for the entire journey 🤢
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
Howay, what's not to like?
Comedian Bob Mortimer on an episode of the UK TV series 'Taskmaster'. He's wearing a mask that consists of; cream cheese skin, wotsit (cheese puff) hair, crisps (potato chips) for eyes with chocolate buttons as the pupils, and a chocolate sprinkle beard. It's horrifyingly beautiful
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Dan Marshall @danthat.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
New (to me) favourite obsession is this German man who slices his bread, measures how good of a job he did and records it in a graph. Just endlessly entertaining content. Solid. youtube.com/@germanbread...
youtube.com
Germanbreadcutter
High-quality bread cutting. Crispy ASMR. Premium German accent. Building the world’s biggest bread-cutting community. Pre-sliced bread? Absolutely not.
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
I hope @respectthedead.bsky.social make some time for Ann Widdecombe now she's popped it
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Paul HELLson @humanolith.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
The thwackrooms
Hellboy knocks the absolute shit out of a nazi in the Backrooms
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The Author, Séamas O'Reilly @seamas.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
Hang it in the Musée Magritte.
Lukaku, in Belgium's Magritte inspired away kit, taunting the most American fans ever devised, decked out in stars and stripes
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Discourse Ignorer @sirsandgoblin.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
What's been fairly depressing is seeing how many American libs are all for trump doing his bullshit when it's for something they like
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