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Hayden Donnell

@haydendonnell.bsky.social
2.8K followers 320 following 441 posts

New Zealand's foremost authority on the Big Fresh Animatronic Fruit & Veggies 📍Te Papa

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Two huge exclusives this week, this is what I pictured myself doing when I entered the World of Journalism
Exclusive: Political momentum is building for bringing back Big FreshExclusive: Wayne Brown has nicked off with the ribbon from the CRL opening
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much like your posting @mlyp.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
thespinoff.co.nz/science/08-0...
thespinoff.co.nz
Update: This was the best kākāpō fuck season ever
The world may be burning but at least the world’s fattest parrot has been boning.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Imagine what it would be like if Mr Fix It wasn't on the case
Audrey young calling simeon brown health mr fix itPatients in soiled beds24 hour ED waits in WellingtonSecond patient found dead in waikato hospital toilet
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Incredible things going down in Auckland
A man with sunglasses next to a dog with sunglasses sitting in a silver car
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
I have once again made a meme, this time to illustrate National's official position on coalition negotiations thespinoff.co.nz/politics/31-...
I can excuse racism but I draw the line at taxing land
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Julie Fairey (she/her) @juliefairey.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
You’re just saying what everyone is thinking.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
Once again proud of my contributions to The Spinoff
What would happen if we all pooed into Auckland’s new poo pipe at the same time?
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
Starting to suspect some of our politicians can be a little self-serving in their public statements
Nicola Willis: don't blame overseas factors for inflationNicola Willis: blame overseas factors for inflation
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
you literally have to read it or you will be prosecuted by councillor Richard Hills
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
this is how I learn my dream has died
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Act yesterday: NZ First is undermining the Indian free trade agreement with its xenophobic rhetoric Act today: our hot new candidate is the man who called an Indian politician "dick shit" and said it was "so appropriate because she's Indian, so she would be dick in shit" when walking the streets
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Russell Brown @publicaddress.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
This is appropriately withering.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
*Waitematā local board, progressively* yes building houses in the rich suburbs near the city is one option but have you considered putting them in south Auckland instead thespinoff.co.nz/politics/03-...
D.	We note the 10km limit seems arbitrary and the exclusive focus on this area risks excluding the potential for intensification in areas closer to where most Aucklanders work and that may have existing infrastructure.
E.	Proximity to jobs is one consideration when choosing a home. The city centre has 15.7% of jobs. This means 85% of jobs are not in the city centre. More are in the Manukau and Central South area stretching between Onehunga, Ellerslie and Panmure. We would recommend reducing barriers to development in these areas close to bus corridors.
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The Spinoff @thespinoff.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
The supposedly progressive campaign to restrict housing in posh suburbs
thespinoff.co.nz
The supposedly progressive campaign to restrict housing in posh suburbs
Helen Clark and the Waitematā Local Board want to dump Auckland’s growth on west and south Auckland, but in a nice, left-wing way....
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
Auckland just had its biggest ever May for cycling and the bulk of the traffic was on separated bike lanes so it's a good thing we haven't banned new NZTA investment in cycleways or anything
Loveridge says figures from the month of May have been particularly encouraging.

 

“In May 2026, cycle trips in Auckland totalled 351,894, reflecting a 14.4% increase from May 2025.

 

“2026 has far outstripped all other years across a ten-year period and even from before,” she says.

 

Year     Month Count

2016    May      275,856

2017    May      298,584 

2018    May      306,187

2019    May      337,002 

2020    May      257,687

2021    May      288,316 

2022    May      261,756

2023    May      255,498 

2024    May      280,444

2025    May      307,581 

2026    May      351,894Top 10 sites by total volume (May 2026)

Te Whau SH16 Cyclist – 50,381

Quay St Eco Display Classic – 44,462

Tamaki Dr – Parnell Cyclist – 38,045

NW Cycleway Kingsland Cyclist – 36,973

Quay St – Spark Arena – 30,421

Nelson St – 25,688

Karangahape Rd Cyclist – 24,526

Grafton Bridge Cyclist – 24,425

Te Wero Bridge Cyclist – 22,226

Lightpath Cyclist – 19,508
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/06/2026
Imagine if we implemented these other people's plans. We go into recession, experience a long-term spike in unemployment and end up with record numbers of insolvencies, all while negotiating a cost of living crisis
Simeon Brown: Other parties' tax plans would destroy growth
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Sacha @sachadylan.bsky.social · 07/06/2026
'But belt-tightening, as it turns out, is for poorer people and public servants. It’s not for the esteemed and often politically-connected candidates they want to install in plum roles on Crown boards.' @haydendonnell.bsky.social #NzPol
thespinoff.co.nz
Austerity is for poor people, not politicians
Belt-tightening, as it turns out, is location-specific. It affects you if you’re in a state house. It doesn't if you’re in the house of representatives.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 21/05/2026
social housing tenants would probably feel more like they had won the Lotto if they could claim a $36,400 accommodation supplement to live in their own property
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 21/05/2026
one of the major clues that social housing tenants haven't in fact won the lotto is that they need social housing
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Ben Gracewood @ben.gracewood.nz · 19/05/2026
I can't believe the damage cycle lanes are gonna do to wellington businesses if this plan to cut 9k public sector employees goes ahead.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 18/05/2026
thankfully the economy is back on track because otherwise I'd be pretty worried about these guys just going straight to Australia or into long-term unemployment
Thousands of public servants to lose jobs, potentially saving government over a billion dollars
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Tim Welch @tfwelch.com · 10/05/2026
Most transport maps show where infrastructure is. I wanted to show what that infrastructure actually lets people reach. I’ve been building the Auckland Transport Access Atlas: an interactive map of car dependency, accessibility, equity, and planner priorities across Auckland. ataa.tfwelch.com
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
David Seymour's comments about not trying to influence RNZ's staffing decisions are slightly undermined by his comments about trying to influence RNZ's staffing decisions
David Seymour attacking RNZ for hiring John Campbell and saying its CEO won't be there for long.David Seymour saying staffing decisions are entirely up to management and he's not trying to interfere.
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Patrick Reynolds for a greater Auckland @patrickreynolds.bsky.social · 05/05/2026
Excellent work @haydendonnell.bsky.social Good News too, the problem of stinky diesel fumes in the Kaimai tunnel can be affordably dealt with via battery trains, like the new intercity trains we are getting for services from Wellington: thespinoff.co.nz/society/05-0...
thespinoff.co.nz
A train trip back in time to before we screwed up our transport system
The Kaimai Express was a trip to a less car-dominated past. It may also have been a small taste of the future.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
A wealthy businessman getting a vaunted vanity award only for it to be revealed that they've engaged in grotty personal misconduct? This must be unprecedented in New Zealand history
Rod Drury faced misconduct complaint
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David Farrier @davidfarrier.com · 13/04/2026
this webworm from @haydendonnell.bsky.social was originally published on february 17, 2025 – but with donald trump recently sharing an AI rendering of himself as *checks notes* jesus christ, it seems appropriate to re-publish it today: www.webworm.co/trumpistheantichrist/
webworm.co
I’ve Seen Enough: Donald Trump is the Antichrist
Re-issue: It’s time to admit the Christians were right all along. The prophecies are coming to pass.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
The worst thing about this headline is I looked it up and he actually has two legs
RNZ: One-legged Carlos Ulberg wins UFC title on one leg
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 01/04/2026
this was yesterday but the great thing about being in New Zealand is that we also get American April Fools today
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
happy to have established myself as a key source of depressing housing news thespinoff.co.nz/politics/31-...
thespinoff.co.nz
Exclusive: Government to slash Auckland housing numbers again
Just weeks after cutting back Auckland's housing capacity plans, the government is set to water them down again.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 25/03/2026
you can learn a lot in The Spinoff comment section
Comment giving coordinates of a cock and balls on the roadThe cock and balls in place on the road in question
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Dylan Reeve @dylanreeve.com · 23/03/2026
Thank goodness The Spinoff rescued @haydendonnell.bsky.social from his totally unhelpful role as a media commentator on RNZ and put his skills to use properly!!
thespinoff.co.nz
Breaking: New racecourse to look like penis
The main track will act as the shaft, while the back track and harness track will be the testicles.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 23/03/2026
once again very proud of my contributions to The Spinoff
Spinoff Headline: Breaking: New racecourse to look like penis
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 17/03/2026
This Iran situation isn't looking great. But surely our politicians have been taking steps to reduce our dependence on oil. Would be very concerned if not thespinoff.co.nz/politics/17-...
thespinoff.co.nz
Petrol is so expensive. Hopefully we’ve been reducing our dependence on it?
It would be a real shame if we’d done something like stop NZTA spending on walking and cycling. Ha ha ha.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 10/03/2026
This actually feels really reassuring I get the appeal
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 09/03/2026
Any time you can crash the global economy to replace a bad guy with a worse guy you gotta do it
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 05/03/2026
Labour had six long years to fix Christopher Luxon's polling
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 04/03/2026
man this is so true
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 24/02/2026
feel I may have undermined today's column by putting in something I actually agree with thespinoff.co.nz/politics/25-...
The government has been dealing with complaints from homeowners in Parnell about its unreasonable plans to upzone their area just because it’s within walking distance of Auckland’s city centre and connected to hundreds of millions of dollars worth of public infrastructure. At the urging of his boss, housing minister Chris Bishop has tied himself in knots trying to accommodate the whiners while still allowing houses near the train line we just spent $5.5bn on. A move-on order for the villa owners in Parnell, along with similarly well-appointed suburbs such as Ponsonby, would clear out some much-needed space and stem the tide of public meetings. Thankfully there’s a mid-sized city crying out for growth in the Manawatū-Whanganui region of the North Island.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/02/2026
Me the government 🤝 Addressing issues by refusing to look at them
Govt gives police move on powers
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 12/02/2026
breaking new frontiers when it comes to headline writing at The Spinoff
Spinoff headline: Good news: It’s kākāpō fuck season
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 11/02/2026
did some data journalism thespinoff.co.nz/politics/11-...
In a 1992 study, researchers found humans produce a median 105g of faecal matter per day. Let’s assume that faeces takes two minutes to evacuate your bowels. If you started now, it would take you 2,535 years, 15 days, 13 hours, and 20 minutes of non-stop shitting to produce as much waste as the Moa Point plant is expelling onto schools of unsuspecting fish every day.
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 04/02/2026
Though I try to stay humble, I'd say I'm probably the nation's top journalist when it comes to in-depth reporting on the Waitangi dildo strike. Even so, I hadn't picked up this piece of info until this week thespinoff.co.nz/politics/05-...
Josie Butler talks about engaging in "dildo target practice" around her flat
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 20/01/2026
Incisive critique from David Seymour: the people trying to remove the single biggest barrier to building housing should focus instead on trying to make it easier to build houses
David Seymour saying the Plan Change 120 debate should focus on how to make it easier to build houses faster and cheaper
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 18/01/2026
would honestly prefer it if the anti-upzoning people would just come out and say the sight of a townhouse makes them sick rather than gabbling on nonsensically about the lack of infrastructure in the most infrastructure-dense parts of the city thespinoff.co.nz/politics/19-...
thespinoff.co.nz
All the bogus reasons for National’s latest housing U-turn
There needs to be an inquiry into the standard of the bullshit we’re expected to believe.<br />
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Sacha @sachadylan.bsky.social · 18/01/2026
'We’ve been treated to a cacophony of handwringing about infrastructure, but it boils down to ‘not in my backyard’.' @haydendonnell.bsky.social #Auckland
thespinoff.co.nz
All the bogus reasons for National’s latest housing U-turn
There needs to be an inquiry into the standard of the bullshit we’re expected to believe.<br />
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 30/11/2025
I know this is a shocking thing to say but the Herald's habit of assuming extra housing is inherently negative has me wondering if it might have some kind of editorial slant on urban issues
Herald saying government requiring more housing = "harsher" rulesHerald saying nine storeys "might not be the worst of it" and taller buildings could be on their way in Freemans Bay
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 30/11/2025
Rank insubordination from AT, taunting the mayor with their Santa parade float
AT's orange road cone mascot at the Santa parade
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 19/11/2025
Auckland’s traffic is bad because we built all our houses in Massey and Papakura to avoid upsetting the inhospitable residents of our inner city suburbs thespinoff.co.nz/society/19-1...
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 05/11/2025
Took a flight to Whakatāne last week. Got to interview the very cool new mayor Nándor Tánczos and most importantly, was finally able to see NZ's most impressive municipal building in person thespinoff.co.nz/politics/05-...
Giving the thumbs up outside the world's greatest municipal building, Whakatāne airport, which looks like a deranged castle, with a turret and an array randomly sloping roofs
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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 27/10/2025
The government’s disdain for unions and love for teachers, doctors and nurses is slightly confusing given unions are made up of teachers, doctors and nurses thespinoff.co.nz/politics/27-...
thespinoff.co.nz
Unions are made of workers
The government’s disdain for unions and love for teachers, doctors and nurses is slightly confusing given unions are made up of teachers, doctors and nurses.
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