iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 12/10/2026

"I'd really like to be recognised for my journalism outside of New Zealand" *monkey's paw curls*

John Oliver quoting me on Kiwibank's sexy green-haired sheep Buck

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

The Spinoff website has been redesigned and I'm proud to deliver an auspicious launch to our new business section

Headline: Kiwibank is desperately trying to stop people saying they want to fuck its sheep mascot

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

Two huge exclusives this week, this is what I pictured myself doing when I entered the World of Journalism

Exclusive: Political momentum is building for bringing back Big Fresh

Exclusive: Wayne Brown has nicked off with the ribbon from the CRL opening

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Imagine what it would be like if Mr Fix It wasn't on the case

Audrey young calling simeon brown health mr fix it

Second patient found dead in waikato hospital toilet

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

Incredible things going down in Auckland

A man with sunglasses next to a dog with sunglasses sitting in a silver car

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 05/08/2026

He was told before the segment it is pronounced more like Dixit and he definitely took care to enunciate it as two clear words

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

I have once again made a meme, this time to illustrate National's official position on coalition negotiations thespinoff.co.nz/politics/31-...

I can excuse racism but I draw the line at taxing land

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

Once again proud of my contributions to The Spinoff

What would happen if we all pooed into Auckland’s new poo pipe at the same time?

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

Starting to suspect some of our politicians can be a little self-serving in their public statements

Nicola Willis: don't blame overseas factors for inflation

Nicola Willis: blame overseas factors for inflation

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 02/07/2026

*Waitematā local board, progressively* yes building houses in the rich suburbs near the city is one option but have you considered putting them in south Auckland instead thespinoff.co.nz/politics/03-...

D. We note the 10km limit seems arbitrary and the exclusive focus on this area risks excluding the potential for intensification in areas closer to where most Aucklanders work and that may have existing infrastructure.
E. Proximity to jobs is one consideration when choosing a home. The city centre has 15.7% of jobs. This means 85% of jobs are not in the city centre. More are in the Manukau and Central South area stretching between Onehunga, Ellerslie and Panmure. We would recommend reducing barriers to development in these areas close to bus corridors.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 25/06/2026

Auckland just had its biggest ever May for cycling and the bulk of the traffic was on separated bike lanes so it's a good thing we haven't banned new NZTA investment in cycleways or anything

Loveridge says figures from the month of May have been particularly encouraging.

“In May 2026, cycle trips in Auckland totalled 351,894, reflecting a 14.4% increase from May 2025.

“2026 has far outstripped all other years across a ten-year period and even from before,” she says.

Year Month Count

2016 May 275,856

2017 May 298,584

2018 May 306,187

2019 May 337,002

2020 May 257,687

2021 May 288,316

2022 May 261,756

2023 May 255,498

2024 May 280,444

2025 May 307,581

2026 May 351,894

Top 10 sites by total volume (May 2026)

Te Whau SH16 Cyclist – 50,381

Quay St Eco Display Classic – 44,462

Tamaki Dr – Parnell Cyclist – 38,045

NW Cycleway Kingsland Cyclist – 36,973

Quay St – Spark Arena – 30,421

Nelson St – 25,688

Karangahape Rd Cyclist – 24,526

Grafton Bridge Cyclist – 24,425

Te Wero Bridge Cyclist – 22,226

Lightpath Cyclist – 19,508

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/06/2026

Imagine if we implemented these other people's plans. We go into recession, experience a long-term spike in unemployment and end up with record numbers of insolvencies, all while negotiating a cost of living crisis

Simeon Brown: Other parties' tax plans would destroy growth

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 18/05/2026

thankfully the economy is back on track because otherwise I'd be pretty worried about these guys just going straight to Australia or into long-term unemployment

Thousands of public servants to lose jobs, potentially saving government over a billion dollars

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 08/05/2026

David Seymour's comments about not trying to influence RNZ's staffing decisions are slightly undermined by his comments about trying to influence RNZ's staffing decisions

David Seymour attacking RNZ for hiring John Campbell and saying its CEO won't be there for long.

David Seymour saying staffing decisions are entirely up to management and he's not trying to interfere.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 14/04/2026

A wealthy businessman getting a vaunted vanity award only for it to be revealed that they've engaged in grotty personal misconduct? This must be unprecedented in New Zealand history

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 12/04/2026

The worst thing about this headline is I looked it up and he actually has two legs

RNZ: One-legged Carlos Ulberg wins UFC title on one leg

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

story does contain some fun quotes from Wayne Brown

Brown is engaged in a long-running feud with Act, who he accuses of being “CAVEs” – constantly against virtually everything.

He’s frustrated with the party’s opposition to a bed night levy, which would be used to fund concerts and sports events, and Seymour’s resistance to dense housing in Epsom.

“They don’t want any concerts in Auckland. They don’t want any sports events because they’re opposing the bed night levy. They don’t want people living intensively. They want us all to live in tents in Maungaturoto.”

Brown says he was fine with the original plan to zone for a capacity of two million houses and may try to go back to it if the government exerts more pressure to downzone in what he considers to be key areas for intensification, including Parnell and Epsom.

“Two million: I was happy enough with that. Just let the market sort itself out. Act is meant to be about the marketplace. They’re the most anti-marketplace outside of Russia,” he says.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 25/03/2026

you can learn a lot in The Spinoff comment section

Comment giving coordinates of a cock and balls on the road

The cock and balls in place on the road in question

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 23/03/2026

once again very proud of my contributions to The Spinoff

Spinoff Headline: Breaking: New racecourse to look like penis

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 10/03/2026

This actually feels really reassuring I get the appeal

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 24/02/2026

feel I may have undermined today's column by putting in something I actually agree with thespinoff.co.nz/politics/25-...

The government has been dealing with complaints from homeowners in Parnell about its unreasonable plans to upzone their area just because it’s within walking distance of Auckland’s city centre and connected to hundreds of millions of dollars worth of public infrastructure. At the urging of his boss, housing minister Chris Bishop has tied himself in knots trying to accommodate the whiners while still allowing houses near the train line we just spent $5.5bn on. A move-on order for the villa owners in Parnell, along with similarly well-appointed suburbs such as Ponsonby, would clear out some much-needed space and stem the tide of public meetings. Thankfully there’s a mid-sized city crying out for growth in the Manawatū-Whanganui region of the North Island.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 22/02/2026

Me the government 🤝 Addressing issues by refusing to look at them

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 12/02/2026

my iconoclastic style is dividing The Spinoff's readership

Comment 1: Appalled at the title and won't be reading the article. Very disappointed in the Spinoff this morning.
Comment 2: Happy at the title and will be re-reading the article. Very proud of the Spinoff this morning

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 12/02/2026

breaking new frontiers when it comes to headline writing at The Spinoff

Spinoff headline: Good news: It’s kākāpō fuck season

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 11/02/2026

did some data journalism thespinoff.co.nz/politics/11-...

In a 1992 study, researchers found humans produce a median 105g of faecal matter per day. Let’s assume that faeces takes two minutes to evacuate your bowels. If you started now, it would take you 2,535 years, 15 days, 13 hours, and 20 minutes of non-stop shitting to produce as much waste as the Moa Point plant is expelling onto schools of unsuspecting fish every day.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 04/02/2026

Though I try to stay humble, I'd say I'm probably the nation's top journalist when it comes to in-depth reporting on the Waitangi dildo strike. Even so, I hadn't picked up this piece of info until this week thespinoff.co.nz/politics/05-...

Josie Butler talks about engaging in "dildo target practice" around her flat

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 20/01/2026

Incisive critique from David Seymour: the people trying to remove the single biggest barrier to building housing should focus instead on trying to make it easier to build houses

David Seymour saying the Plan Change 120 debate should focus on how to make it easier to build houses faster and cheaper

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 30/11/2025

I know this is a shocking thing to say but the Herald's habit of assuming extra housing is inherently negative has me wondering if it might have some kind of editorial slant on urban issues

Herald saying government requiring more housing = "harsher" rules

Herald saying nine storeys "might not be the worst of it" and taller buildings could be on their way in Freemans Bay

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 30/11/2025

Rank insubordination from AT, taunting the mayor with their Santa parade float

AT's orange road cone mascot at the Santa parade

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 19/11/2025

Historically true but our bus network is actually pretty comprehensive now and the trains are obviously gonna improve in a year. Hard to overcome the structural difficulties of sprawl

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 19/11/2025

Auckland’s traffic is bad because we built all our houses in Massey and Papakura to avoid upsetting the inhospitable residents of our inner city suburbs thespinoff.co.nz/society/19-1...

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 05/11/2025

Took a flight to Whakatāne last week. Got to interview the very cool new mayor Nándor Tánczos and most importantly, was finally able to see NZ's most impressive municipal building in person thespinoff.co.nz/politics/05-...

Giving the thumbs up outside the world's greatest municipal building, Whakatāne airport, which looks like a deranged castle, with a turret and an array randomly sloping roofs

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 15/10/2025

Vulgar graffiti on the northwestern cycle path, yet more evidence this city has descended into lawlessness

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

Step one: engineer a recession and cancel infrastructure projects. Step two: get mad at people for not having a job thespinoff.co.nz/politics/10-...

The Spinoff: In other words, we did it, folks. Joblessness is up. Inflation is down. Mince is admittedly four trillion dollars. But overall, success! Surely our government should be pulling a George W Bush and unfurling a mission accomplished banner above the rusted deck of the HMNZS Canterbury.

Instead, it called a press conference to say, in essence, wtf. Luxon and social development minister Louise Upston gathered reporters on Sunday to announce too many 18- and 19-year-olds were claiming the benefit, and they’ll be cutting them off if their parents earn more than the princely sum of $65,529 combined. Asked where young people should get a job in a recession, which, again, we deliberately engineered, Luxon pointed to kūmara harvesting in Dargaville or seasonal work in orchards. Orchardists promptly responded that they didn’t need more staff right now.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

experiencing a swell of patriotism over our officials repeatedly losing secret government documents at second hand stores

RNZ: Confidential Wellington council documents found by man in mayoral desk bought from dump

Newsroom: Secret defence notes pointing to sensitive China preparation left at op shop

Nothing happened for a year. Then in August 2025 a shopper browsing through a pile of op shop goods made a most surprising discovery. The trove of secret documents from the Portsmouth meetings had been accidentally donated to a Hutt Valley Salvation Army store.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 05/10/2025

I have been back at The Spinoff for a while and once again I am doing very well thank you thespinoff.co.nz/politics/06-...

Hello, are you in the hospital? OK you are using government. But did you do a poo in the hospital toilet? That’s pipes. Council. Did you get driven to the hospital on a road? Probably council unless it was a motorway straight to the hospital door. Are you in school? Fine that’s government. But did you use a pedestrian crossing to get to school? Council. Did you go on a bus? Again, council.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 01/10/2025

Was surprised to learn on Waatea News recently that the deputy PM doesn’t think politicians should change election rules without a public vote, and am expecting that Act will withdraw its support for restrictions on voter registration any day now thespinoff.co.nz/politics/01-...

But if you don’t live by your principles, they start to look less like principles, and more like self-interest. On Waatea, Seymour left no room for doubt: he believes meaningful election changes should be put to a public vote before they’re enacted. Surely what’s good for the lefty goose is good for the libertarian gander. The Electoral Amendment Bill will have its second reading in the coming months. There’s still time for the deputy prime minister – and the government – to have a change of heart, and show some consistency.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 01/10/2025

Really big day for our nation's headline writers

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 28/09/2025

Personally think we should consider making this not just the way it is

If a wealthy sex offender donates a large amount of money to charity, should they be eligible for a reduced prison sentence?

A top King’s Counsel says it’s not unusual for a court to award a sentence discount for reparation or compensation.

Does that put a rich criminal in a better position at sentencing than someone with less money?

“Yes, and that’s just life. That is just the way it is,” Marie Dyhrberg, KC, told the Herald

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 27/09/2025

Feel like our priorities on what's urgent may be a bit skewed

Not good enough to take 20 days to count special votes

But recognising Palestinian statehood is not a race

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 17/09/2025

Our strongest anti-cancel culture warriors once again hard at work defending free speech

Sean Plunket and Damien Grant trying to get David Farrier deported for being rude about Charlie Kirk

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 15/09/2025

on the one hand, this sounds like it won't raise enough money for them to fund meaningful tax relief for the people struggling the most with the cost of living, but on the other it will be ruthlessly attacked and exploited by their political opponents

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 12/09/2025

go for my amazing feature image design skills, stay for an in-depth discussion of infrastructure thespinoff.co.nz/politics/12-...

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 07/09/2025

First day back at The Spinoff but the damn mayor is stealing all my story ideas

Auckland Mayor Wayne Brown is having none of it, telling the Star-Times that the “desperate deputy prime minister” shouldn’t “stick his nose in it”.

“So they want to build out in Pukekohe so they can get re-elected in Epsom? Yeah, that makes a lot of sense, doesn’t it?” says Brown.

The wealthy peninsula suburb has a large number of historic villas and has largely resisted intensification.

“We want the Devonport ferry to be marked up as a mainline transit so we can concentration of building design as you do in other high speed transit.”

“You’re not going to be building high rises in Devonport, are you? This is going to upset everyone,” Brewer challenged Brown.

“Yeah, but they deserve to be upset,” Brown responded.

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 26/08/2025

Final team meeting for Mediawatch. Gonna miss this guy!!

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 26/08/2025

pointing out the housing "wealth effect" our commentators and politicians are pining for comes with a corresponding "I'm on the bones of my arse" effect for everyone who doesn't own housing thespinoff.co.nz/society/26-0...

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 14/08/2025

The lecture I delivered in Ponsonby last night wasn't universally well-received

Me presenting a lecture slide containing the headline 'Defund Ponsonby (and give the money to suburbs that actually accept new housing)

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Hayden Donnell @haydendonnell.bsky.social · 04/08/2025

this is an image I think about a lot. It's old now but not that much has changed. The big circles are where we build most in Auckland and you'll notice the biggest ones are absolutely nowhere near the city fringe where all the best public transport and infrastructure is

Auckland's development patterns 2019-2020

the small circles are in places like Herne Bay and Ponsonby

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