glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 08/03/2026Walgreens is the “husband I settled for because I wanted kids” of pharmacies 000
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Him: You survived one of the worst earthquakes in history. How do you feel? Me: shook 000
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Me: While I wanted to stand up on the desk and tell everyone to suck “deez nuts” I just wished them well and quietly departed Therapist: You are finally showing maturity. Me: I also threw a bunch of raw shrimp in the air ducts when nobody was looking. Therapist pours herself a drink 000
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialNicki💗 @awkwardandodd.bsky.social · 28/01/2026My cat got a new box and he is very excited about it 1888981503
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Me in my 20’s: ha ha ha, I drank so much I should be dead a week ago! Me in my mid 30’s: these new hangers are opening up so much more space in my closet! 000
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialTin Foil Awards @tinfoilawards.bsky.social · 26/01/2026I just got a notice at 4:15 that they're shutting off my water for 5 hours starting at 5pm and that if I have any questions I can call during normal office hours that ended at 3:30... 1111
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 27/01/2026There are two kinds of ice: one is slippery, dangerous and kills people. The other is frozen water 000
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 27/01/2026We like to think writing was invented for philosophy or sharing knowledge, but the earliest surviving text is a grievance about bad copper, carved into a clay tablet. Here we are in the modern day posting Yelp reviews on iPads. 4,000 years and humanity still uses tablets to complain 000
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialAllison Gill @muellershewrote.com · 19/01/2026Men who defend Jonathan Ross for murdering Renee Good are not safe to be around. End those relationships. 768354098672
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialMemento (spooky) Morty 🌙 @mementomorty.bsky.social · 10/01/2026I would be a perfect employee if I knew how to meet a single deadline 8743
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 07/01/2026I’m being mistaken for an adult again, due to my age 000
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 22/12/2025At least I am respected at home 1245114
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialTin Foil Awards @tinfoilawards.bsky.social · 15/12/2025If you gather the largest possible number of crows in one place, you have a murder most fowl 4102
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 15/12/2025Oh God I’m going to throw up. Better get to the carpet! - Cats 240
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 13/12/2025Vintage model highlighting the full-bodied rear quarter with a contrasting accent band around the spoiler… nice. 010
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 13/12/2025Me: Did you get into the trash again? The cat with butter on his head: No 020
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 10/12/2025Cat: splayed across my face as I struggle to breathe through the belly fluff Also cat: Don’t violate my personal space! 010
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 08/12/2025Me opening BlueSky after a multi month mental health hiatus: back to the psychological woodchipper baby! 010
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 08/12/2025How did you resist tickling the feetsie? 110
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialBetter Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 08/12/2025Scientists now believe that the human brain--a magic goo for worrying--can also be used to do other things 605342914
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialMemento (spooky) Morty 🌙 @mementomorty.bsky.social · 08/12/2025If I were a cat, I would tear down every Christmas tree 111339
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 11/05/2025There are two kinds of “ants” people. Those who set the bait traps and walk away or those who cut off the water supply, set up barricades to redirect to the bait, destroy the trails, and engage in direct combat leaving the corpses out to inflict an atmosphere of pure terror. 110
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 30/04/2025Oh my god nobody in the comments did it first?! Okay okay here I go everybody… WHY I OTTA! 000
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 30/04/2025In defense of the dog I also go looking for cheese while the coffee is being prepared 020
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialsoul nate @mnateshyamalan.bsky.social · 28/04/2025the poor foster dog is terrified of the coffee grinder. i feel the need to explain. “these are the beans you have to drink when you are a person,” i say. “sometimes things are very very bad. but then the beans happen and it is good.” i can tell she understands 26612658818
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 30/04/2025Picks you up and screams WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME 010
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 28/04/2025I want to scritch it. Then pick it up and delicately place it on my pillow until it falls asleep again 010
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 27/04/2025Him: We need to talk. Promise me you won’t make a scene Me: I’d never. *winks at the blimp pilot who quickly finishes his coffee* 000
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialJohn Green @johngreensbluesky.bsky.social · 21/04/2025Happy Easter to everyone but especially to the Delta flight attendant who said, "I've seen you five times this month; are you okay?" 32383976
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialsoul nate @mnateshyamalan.bsky.social · 20/04/2025huge day for the wicker basket industry 1759342
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialsoul nate @mnateshyamalan.bsky.social · 20/04/2025disciple 1: he’s alive! returned from the dead! disciple 2: did he roll away the stone? disciple 3: did he show you the holes in his hands? judas: did he uh. did he mention me 886837631
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 21/04/2025It’s extra funny you see, because cocaine is a tropane alkaloid with weak basic properties and coke cooked with baking soda releases hydrochloride making it into the “free-base” form. The origin of someone acting based comes fro-Hey! Wait no come back I’m not done explaining the joke! 010
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 21/04/2025Cashier: scans a bottle of wine Me, trying to still seem young: I have big plans for tonight. Cashier raises an eyebrow as he then scans five Gatorades, heartburn tablets and a bottle of ibuprofen 000
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialBetter Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 20/04/2025The "duvet cover" is a government program to test how docile the population is. They want to know how much Bullshit we'll put up with. They are laughing at us 844725572
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialKumail Nanjiani @kumail.bsky.social · 13/04/2025I know times are bad because any date from the future (2034, 2078, 2026) sounds like it could be the title of a post-apocalyptic movie. 1285681386
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 14/04/2025Me trying to appear cultured on the first date: Shall we make our way to the Haus of Waffle? 000
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 14/04/2025But I think this layer took care of it 000
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 14/04/2025Attempted to correct some odd spots and managed to make more 100
Reposted by @glitter-demon666.bsky.socialEize Basa @eizebasa.baby · 11/04/2025And so another bag of salad mix has come to my fridge to die in peace... 8814
glitter-demon666.bsky.social @glitter-demon666.bsky.social · 12/04/2025youtu.be/VRq8etRvzSs?...youtu.bePULGASARI (1985) North Korea Giant Monster film - (english subtitles)YouTube video by 24 Million Views 000
