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Johnny Deadlift

@dropinandsmack1.bsky.social
228 followers 243 following 147 posts

Man about town, fake Canadian, Japanese macaque bathing in a hot spring I like funny jokes

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Reposted by Johnny Deadlift
A-100 gecs @pinstripebungle.bsky.social · 31/12/2024
Just reminded of the "Scully Effect" - that girls who watched the X-files were more likely to pursue careers in science- but this ignores the bigger "Mulder Effect" which inspired a whole generation of young men to become socially awkward porn addicted conspiracy theorists.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 30/12/2024
“No, it’s Michael Penis JUNIOR. Michael Penis was my father.”
Picture of the new QB for the Atlanta Falcons, Michael Penix Jr
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 30/12/2024
Someone is going to lose their house because they’re a problem gambler and they’ll spend years grumbling about a “penix fumble”
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 30/12/2024
Schoolchildren are going to learn Roman numerals so that can trick their classmates into joining the “pen nine club”
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 30/12/2024
My name is Michael Penis Junior, commander of the Falcons of the South, General of the Penis Legions and loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Penisurilius. Penis to a murdered son. Husband to a murdered Penis. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next. Penis.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 23/12/2024
I still can’t believe that Thiel named his surveillance company “Palintir.” He openly referred to his services as “the thing that seems to give you limitless powers of surveillance, but actually distorts your reality and eventually allows me to control you” and then governments still bought in.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 20/12/2024
When I worked at Party City, we used to rig up pneumatic blowguns using the big helium tanks, a straw, wads of paper, and tacks. We’d take turns trying to shoot down wayward balloons that had become unmoored and floated to the ceiling. Good memory.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 19/12/2024
Send not to know for whom the bus bangs, it bangs for thee.
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Caleb Alexander @readingcabbage.bsky.social · 19/12/2024
All timer, for me.
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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 17/12/2024
The powers that be are censoring my views that 1) the joker should be a clown 2) clowns should do crime 3) the crime clown should be named the joker 4) he should seem happy even though he’s angry 5) the clown should be keep being named joker
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Melinda M. Snodgrass @melindas.bsky.social · 07/12/2024
Thank you very much. My focus in law school was Constitutional law, and it was a way to discuss Dred Scott in a setting where it could have an impact, but give people space to consider the issues without becoming defensive. It's what makes science fiction so wonderful.
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Dan @antonioslamsci.bsky.social · 05/12/2024
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BayBayFriend @baybayfriend.bsky.social · 12/07/2024
Album cover of a woman in cowboy boots sitting against a fence and playing guitar. Text: Taxidermist's Daughter.
Gwendolyn McGreat
Features:
"Harvest Allure."Back cover of the album. A song list reads, Roll in the Hay,
Knockin' Cowboy Boots,
The Sexual Cowboy,
My First Rodeo (Braiden's Song),
The Sexual Farmer,
Harvest Allure,
Double Studs (Braiden and Connar's Song),
Six Boots at My Bedside,
Not Enough Eggs,
It Takes Three to Line Dance,
Gossip Mill,
(God Wants Me to Have) Two Country Husbands.

(money for nothin, grits for three)
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
That cancellation could not have come at a better time. Just found this bad boy at work. Bring me the muppet, he must be stamped
Hand holding a large rectangular stamp that says CANCELLED on the handleStamp applied to blank sheet of paper, blue block letters in all caps that say CANCELLED
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 29/11/2024
This is great. A dude who posts like David Simon if he were a MAGA conservative, but instead of making The Wire he’s been the subject of anti-suit injunctions from family courts in multiple states
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 29/11/2024
Just had this pop on to my feed organically, and it was like seeing an old friend. It’s official: Bluesky has supplanted Twitter.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 28/11/2024
Seconded on muellershewrote! Robert Mueller is taking his time. He’s just under deep cover right now, posing as a humiliating failure. When he finally does something it’s going to be EPIC and you won’t want to miss it
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 28/11/2024
Newest iOS update turned my apps evil?
Screenshot of bottom icons on iOS mobile Home Screen, in which the background of the app icons is black for some reason
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 26/11/2024
Depressed Murder Is that good?
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 25/11/2024
Drake cements his reputation as softest rapper in the game
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greg2hats @cyberbadboy.com · 23/11/2024
Drove through a cool patch of highway today that was both very bright and very misty, like when you get to Valhalla in Skyrim if the heroes of the past were all Subaru Outbacks
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Stellbound: Stellraiser II @antlervel.vet · 21/11/2024
HASTINGS: I say, Poirot, this vial’s labeled “hyaluronic acid”! Is it a poison? SKINCARE HERCULE POIROT: Non, mon ami. This acid, it replenishes the skin’s barrier naturale HASTINGS: So this is a gal who takes care of her skin. SKINCARE HERCULE POIROT: *irritated* The gentleman may use it as well
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 20/11/2024
I give up so I’ve decided that chirality and helicity are the same thing. That’s just something I believe.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 15/11/2024
I am feel uncomfortable when we are not about me?
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mankrik's wife guy @byelacey.bsky.social · 08/11/2024
no one wants to talk about this but the reason picking up cold dog poop is worse than picking up fresh dog poop is because the warmth it provides is a small comfort. you like the warmth a little bit
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 08/11/2024
Close to one year sober, and I can say that being bipolar helps. It’s easier to resist alcohol because I harbor a secret and shameful hope that, through sobriety, the universe will elevate me and let me once again see The Pattern. I understand that this isn’t an option for a lot of people though
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 05/11/2024
Indiana Jones is a professor of archaeology at a liberal arts college in Connecticut. He not only votes Harris, he has one of those “in this house” yard signs.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 04/11/2024
“Lovers, of course, are notoriously frantic epistemologists, second only to paranoiacs (and analysts) as readers of signs and wonders.” Adam Phillips, “On Love”
Capybara with a single yuzu on its head, staring straight on, surrounded by other yuzu fruit floating in a hot bath
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 31/10/2024
Pretty proud of my pumpkin this year
A Jack-o-Lantern that is just teeth and no other features
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 29/10/2024
albums where the first four tracks are absolute bangers Sort of unbelievable that these are also the first four songs on their first album. Nothing else like it in popular music imo
Cover of The Violent Femmes debut self-titled album from 1983, featuring a painting of little girl in a white dress looking through a windowFirst four songs of The Violent Femmes’s first album:

Blister in the Sun

Kiss Off

Please Do Not Go

Add It Up
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 18/10/2024
I am watching Canadian basic cable for the first time in years, and I’ve stumbled upon a show called Hudson and Rex. It’s a buddy cop police procedural, except one of the cops is a dog. youtu.be/_3OjHfXoDsI?...
youtu.be
Hudson & Rex | New Drama Series on Citytv
YouTube video by Citytv
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 17/10/2024
What if you fell in love with someone and then discovered that they stand on the left side of escalators?
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 10/10/2024
Coke and Smirnoff Vanilla. To this day, I can’t smell Vanilla Coke without wretching
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 10/10/2024
Breaking: Writer and controversial social media figure Caroline Calloway, 33, has tragically survived hurricane Milton.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 09/10/2024
Demi Moore playing the guitar in One Crazy Summer (1986)
Woman in a blazer with shoulder pads raising right hand while cradling the neck of a guitar in her left hand
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 03/01/2024
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jon rosenberg @jonrosenberg.bsky.social · 23/12/2023
I get the butterfly. It's blue, it's in the sky, it invokes the memory of the other place that had a blue guy flying around. It's not terrible. But it needs a huge cock
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 21/12/2023
Fuck Elon I hope Twitter is broken for good
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 30/11/2023
Nixon: Where you been? We were waiting forever. Suharto is already dancing naked with a lampshade on his head, and Pinochet passed out. Kissinger: AAAAAAH fuck it’s hot!
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drewtoothpaste @drewtoothpaste.bsky.social · 29/11/2023
Just got this in email from Tim Cook and it had a video link and he personally addressed me by name and said Jazz Fucker to me in the video and when I tried to close the video my 8 year old mac caught on fire. I am posting this from my 13 year old mac where I keep my backup mp3 collection. Of jazz
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 21/11/2023
TS Eliot in 1922:
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an appliance is making a weird noise that isn't on youtube @jesseltaylor.bsky.social · 18/11/2023
1923: The world's richest man is an antisemite. The hot new music on the street is experimental jazz flute. 2023: The world's richest man is an antisemite. The hot new music on the street is experimental jazz flute.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 17/11/2023
Track list for Andre 3000’s new album. Initial thoughts: it don’t mean a toot if it ain’t got that flute.
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 16/11/2023
Pinkerton is probably the most obvious Maybe Kid A too
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 16/11/2023
“Cacio e pepe” is Italian for “poopoo and peepee”
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 16/11/2023
The “bin laden letter going viral” story reminds me of @wyattprivilege.bsky.social on the last ALAB episode about the Vedic concept that a king bears karmic responsibility for the citizens under its rule
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 14/11/2023
I recognize only the one true Christian Baby
Baby Bobby Billy from Righteous Gemstones in Ostentatious Clam Outfit
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 14/11/2023
These pictures have the best delta between “opulent environment” and “mournfully underwhelming food” that I’ve ever seen
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 29/09/2023
Kicking the timeline off with a bit of tongue
Black and white dog with tongue sticking slightly out of mouth
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Johnny Deadlift @dropinandsmack1.bsky.social · 29/09/2023
That little spacebitch ain’t getting my ID
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