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Ben Helford

@benzored.bsky.social
449 followers 1.9K following 1.4K posts

City fan, dog dad, Seattlite. He/him. "It is difficult with these evil folk to know when they are in league, and when they are cheating one another." - Aragorn

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Reposted by Ben Helford
beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 6h
Three panel comic. Panel 1: underwater ocean camera view of a whale fall on the sea floor, with various bottom feeders and weird fishes crawling around the decomposing remains. Off panel, someone says, “hang on a second…” Panel 2: the speaker is a member of a marine biologist crew, remotely viewing the video footage from a computer monitor. The biologist is leaning against his colleague’s chair. He continues, “pan the camera back.” Panel 3: Back underwater, the POV shifts to the other end of the whale carcass. There’s a large spider crab with a standing just off to the side. It has a human face in a neutral expression, and is wearing glasses. The marine biologist says, “I think I went to high school with that guy.”
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Rona may be a better babysitter than Swan Boy, but Swan Boy is a better role model for Sebastian.
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Jess Fink🍉🌈 @jessfink.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
🎃
A 7 panel comic by the artist. First panel: The artist is running from a distance towards a group of people playing basketball in the park. The artist is holding a pumpkin above their head and screaming "AAAAAAAAA". Second panel: The artist has leapt up and is in position to slam dunk the pumpkin into the basketball hoop. Panel three: the pumpkin splatters violently against the backboard of the basketball hoop, sending orange pumpkin goop everywhere. Panel four: the players stand staring, covered in pumpkin goop and shocked. Panel five: the artist stares at them wide-eyed, also covered in the goop and says "it's October FIRST". Their hand reaches towards their face. Panel six: the artist rips off their own face like a rubber mask to reveal a skeleton beneath. Panel 7: the group of players stand shocked and horrified, watching as the skeleton falls to the ground in a pile of bones, the sound effects says "CLATTER".
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𝕃𝕦𝕔𝕒𝕧𝕚 ⓘ Rude 🐈 @lucavi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
It is too late, I have already depicted myself as the άνθρωπος ίσχυρός and you as the άνθρωπος παρθένος 🫵
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I'm quite familiar with this particular comic because I share this comic with literally anyone I can at any conceivable opportunity.
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Poorly Drawn Lines @poorlydrawnlines.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Things That Can Fly
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
If you ever wondered about what are the exact methods Swan Boy uses to put on a turtleneck, well, do I have the comic for you!
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Poorly Drawn Lines @poorlydrawnlines.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Extra dramatic
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
These complex mathematics problems are always interesting.
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Jason Steele @filmcow.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
New video—The Triangle Problem. Can you spot the Problem? youtu.be/uKdjWL2kmXM?...
youtu.be
The Triangle Problem
YouTube video by FilmCow
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Two panel comic. Panel 1: a girl says to a guy, “my homegirl thinks you’re cute.” Panel 2: the guy looks over to the left at the alleged homegirl, who is standing in the corner of the room, dripped out head-to-toe in SpongeBob SquarePants-related merchandise, including but not limited to: a t-shirt that reads: “IF YOU SEE DA POLICE… KRUSTY KRAB”, a best friends forever watch, spongebobs signature black shoes, and Mermaid Man’s belt set to “W” for Wumbo
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Your Internet Friend Tom Tomorrow @tomtomorrow.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
TMW cartoon with trump etc. in a star trek-like setting
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BioWare Problems @biowareproblems.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
The history of the elves be like
An image of Arlathan forest in Dragon Age: The Veilguard. The text reads:

"Been thinking things over and wonder if I've taken this whole longevity thing too far."
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Nothing says "high art" like a gold image of an RFK Jr. quotation next to an image of what is apparently Leather Face in a suit.
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
I did a combination of games I loved and set up my taste in my formative years and games in my adulthood that kinda defined what games as an artform can be.
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Mark Hamill @markhamillofficial.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Comparing him to 47 is highly insulting... to Jabba.
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kabona @dilfosaur.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
off to the races #coyotevsacme
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Three panel comic. Panel 1: a guy is being interviewed in an office. The interviewer, pointing to his computer display, asks, “can you explain this gap in your resume?” The interviewee replies, “uh…” Panel 2: out of thin air a portal emerges between the two men. Rocketing out of the portal is a time traveling dodo bird wearing futuristic gear. The dodo exclaims, “I’m back! I saved us from extinction!” A coffee cup is knocked over. Panel 3: at the edge of the desk, the dodo takes a knee, staring futilely out the window to a metropolitan city. It says, “No… NO!!” The two men observe, nonplussed.
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Poorly Drawn Lines @poorlydrawnlines.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Confused
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✨Star✨ Commissions Live!! @starcre8tor.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
ahh im having fun with this 😣💦 Will work on it more later~ #wip
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Okay, this is one of the sweetest comics I've read, but it did lead me to go into a deep dive to determine if Swan Boy started seeing Cassie before or after he had sex with a Cenobite.
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Ha ha! I solved the daily #CluesBySam, Sep 6th 2026 (Hard), in less than 10 minutes 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 cluesbysam.com
cluesbysam.com
Clues by Sam
A daily logic puzzle where you deduce who is a criminal!
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Peter @notalawyer.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
it’s very validating that there’s no one who’s extremely pro-Israel but then otherwise a normal, kind person. it’s all guys who are disgusted by children’s hospitals.
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Drop some HELMETS ⛑️🖤🪖
static.klipy.com
Spaceballs: Keep Firing, Assholes!
ALT: Spaceballs: Keep Firing, Assholes!
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Poorly Drawn Lines @poorlydrawnlines.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
the ghost of this lamp
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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
I know everyone has seen the Miyazaki clip of him saying that AI art is an insult to life itself and we humans are losing faith in ourselves but sometimes it still strikes me that he said that in 2016 and every single year the quote becomes more true and undeniable
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
This is just how chain restaurants work. Deal with it.
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Two panel comic. Panel 1: breaking news drone footage of an overturned truck with a giant barrel in place of a cargo bed, floating in a body of water. A fire truck and some locals surround the scene. On screen text reads: “BREAKING; Whisky truck crashes into Loch Ness” Panel 2: the Loch Ness monster is facedown in a bush, totally passed out. A local Scot security guard is passing by in a golf cart. He exclaims, “Crikey— what’s this!?”
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Without saying your age, what is your favorite movie that came out when you were 20 years old?
static.klipy.com
Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
ALT: Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Swan Boy - great babysitter, great role model, great friend.
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Dreamboat Branny 🦢 @bransonreese.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
swanboy.com/comic/swan-b...
The first panel of today's Swan Boy. A squirrel and a rat make a simple, reasonable request of the patrons of Carrabba's
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Your Internet Friend Tom Tomorrow @tomtomorrow.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
MONDAY MORNING TOON: future tech innovations (note: I am familiar with the torment nexus meme, no need to fill my mentions with that one all week! thanks.) www.dailykos.com/stories/2026...
dailykos.com
Future tech innovations
A cartoon by Tom Tomorrow.
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J. L. Westover @mrlovenstein.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
survival of the fittest
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Some eclipse photos taken from the Seattle waterfront.
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kate bush’s husband @airbagged.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
3 minutes of Tim Curry holding back laughter while filming scenes for Red Alert 3
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Jen Sorensen @jensorensen.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
New comic: The trouble with oligarchy-curious Dems www.dailykos.com/stories/2026...
dailykos.com
The trouble with oligarchy-curious Democrats
A cartoon by Jen Sorensen.
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Eric Brandom @ebrandom.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
IWW poster, 1917. www.jstor.org/stable/commu...
Bright red print. THIEF! across the top in negative, then an image of children working a cotton mill machine, while a wealthy man stands to the right. written below: "The worst thief is he who steals the playtime of children. - WD Haywood" Join the IWW and help put the thieves to work.
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Captain Revo @captainrevo.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
TNG episodes: The Cost of Perception: La Forge is offered the chance to see, but he must leave starfleet, while Doctor Crusher weighs the ethics of an experimental new drug. Anubis: The crew must save the galaxy from destruction by a devastating new alien threat. The Haircut: Data gets a haircut.
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
A trans woman eyes a cactus and says "I don't know what it is, but there's something trans as hell about this cactus." She makes a social media post where she is kissing the pot the cactus is in with the caption "I love my trans cactus." Replies are "so cute, OMG, and gorgeous gorgeous girls love cacti." Some other trans women view the post and one says "yo that cactus is trans as hell." A flood of trans women purchast cacti at the cactus store. The owner rejoices "thank you ladies, you have saved the cactus store."
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Swan Boy is a great babysitter.
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Post a perfect album from the 00s
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Poorly Drawn Lines @poorlydrawnlines.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Welcome to the forest.
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Swanboy's eyes are narrowing so much while he's reasoning things out, he must be on the right track!
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Poorly Drawn Lines @poorlydrawnlines.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Check this out.
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Just realized I haven't graced my feed with a Coltrane pic for some time, so here you go!
Coltrane being a sweet dog and placing his paw on my hand as of to say "more affection please."
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Dude must suck for that king. You're like "All right, I finally get to rest here for eternity," then suddenly, bam, 1000 years later you've got to evacuate.
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Three panel comic. Panel 1: two raccoons are sitting at a table with a bunch of podcast recording equipment. Raccoon one says into the microphone, “you gotta cut the negativity out of your life.” Panel 2: raccoon replies, “facts” Panel 3: raccoon 1 continues with his hands clasped together to capture the sincerity of his monologue, “that way you have more time to eat garbage.” Raccoon 2 contributes, “that’s facts”
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Michael Kupperman @mkupperman.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
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Ben Helford @benzored.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
This is dystopic and terrifying, but also will be hilarious when a bunch of untrained ICE schlubs are hospitalized after accidentally applying the gloves to themselves.
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Three panel comic. Panel 1: a psychic medium is conducting a seance at a table with a small group of people. With his head lowered, the medium says, “we will now attempt to contact the spirit realm.” Panel 2: a wraith-like ghost is sitting on the toilet in a well-lit bathroom, idly scrolling on its phone. The phone is ringing. Panel 3: displayed on the phone screen is an incoming call 
 from “Creepy Psychic Guy”, whose default contact photo is one of those fuckin bitmoji emoji faces - i can’t stand those things. Anyway the ghost declines the call.
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