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@alexandra-ewing.bsky.social
317 followers 292 following 695 posts

fat, queer thirty-something finally takes on the world after a decade of low income, low expectations, & low porosity hair. it's the feel-good story of the summer. | she/her

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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 11h
texting my mother from across the room and finally text "I'm looking at you, are you ignoring me? the texts say delivered" at which point she got VERY flustered and replied 😑😬🙃🫠🫩
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Pixie Casey @pixiecasey.bsky.social · 12/10/2026
“Guys at the gym are always running! And I’m like, what are you running from buddy? Commitment? Am I right ladies?”
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
every year i think i'll be fine after my flu and COVID vax double shot, and every year i end up whimpering in bed and feeling so ill
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KOTH Screens @kothscreens.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Screenshot from King of the Hill Season 3, Episode 13
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
what are we doing 🫩
NYT headline reading "Trump Administration Hits International Criminal Court
With Severe Sanctions," followed by the subhead "U.S. officials announced the new, sweeping punishments just hours after the Nobel Peace Prize committee gave its annual honor to a former court judge."
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Jaime Green @jaimealyse.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
Happy nobel lit day to all who celebrate by checking Alex's feed
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Kim Kelly @kimkelly.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
New Philly monster just dropped share.inquirer.com/Wrd1yT
share.inquirer.com
Orifice the Awebot is Philly’s ‘magical’ response to Uber Eats robots
"She’s part of our bringing delight and surprise and letting it ripple through the city."
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
weeks of hating emmerdale's most recent plots but one day where my beloved son gives a little speech about being formerly incarcerated and i'm a tiny bit proud of it again
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
it finally happened: clicked on a dress thinking it would be cute for my toddler niece, but then found out it was actually a plus size item!! fat girls know it is always the reverse
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Lindsey Boylan @lindseyboylan.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
This man is a monster. He seeks out women survivors because he hates them. And he hates them because he hates himself. He has harassed me and other women survivors many times over the years. It must end. He should never have a job anywhere.
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
killing me that the étagère i have coveted for years and years for "one day" is finally available for free and the poster is saying "i would hate to put this in a landfill"
brass étagère on facebook marketplace listed for free.
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pilot @pilotv.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
ok honestly who will hire me to write about 9-1-1 this season
A poster featuring a volcano with lava that spells out 911 and the tagline “welcome to la-va land”
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
okay he stopped after 1) i yelled "you don't have a mother!" at the tv and 2) the video ran out of stock images of eggplant and used one of cookies instead
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
my father is watching an ai italian guy from new york stereotype give him advice about how to cook eggplant and i tried to say i wouldn't believe this advice but he told me he trusts the guy even though he ALSO knows the guy isn't real
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
i can't imagine there's an actual rule for this, but it feels like when talking about the actor taylor lautner and his wife taylor lautner, the correct address should be "the taylors lautner"
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
a top so ugly, so me
a hot pink velvet burnout leopard print with keyhole neck and sleeves with elastic at the wrist and flared fabric covering the hand
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
dad: it says you can only do it on the website. but i'm on the website! me: *are you*???? (father is silent)
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
"sometimes" is playing in the lobby of the dispensary and i want to laugh so hard because it's the last thing i expected, but i feel like britney would approve
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Sharon 🪳🌹 @sharonk.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
lmao
Ukraine has agreed not to hit Russian Energy targets. Russia has agreed to do, likewise! The World’s Diesel price rise is mostly caused by the Russia/Ukraine War, not Iran. President DJT
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christina @xtinatheegreat.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
all the best people are birds fans.
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NBCs The Slap @nbcstheslap.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
a guy who was on an okay to middling FX comedy lost his career over this
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
aldi guy: (searching loaf of bread all over for the bar code) me: i know, it took me forever, it's— aldi guy: (finds it, hidden in crinkled corner of bag, sighs, holds it flat, scans) you know, they want us to scan 40 items a minute? me: ridiculous aldi guy: (gesturing) how can you with that?
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
i'm going to be so jealous of whoever gets this painting i've been watching for weeks on fbmp. it's such a winner, the best thing i've seen in ages.
a painting of an late seventies early eighties jazzercise-style fitness enthusiast in her twenties, lounging coolly, wearing a mask over her eyes, a purple leotard, turquoise tights, and black strappy heels. the background is pink.a close up on the woman's face. she is wearing a gray mask with pointed edges over her eyes. her hair is ginger and curly and round. a circular gold earring peeks from her right ear. she looks confident.listing for a painting of an late seventies early eighties jazzercise-style fitness enthusiast. listing title reads "1979 oil painting Exercise Lady Retro Vintage." the printing was listed at 800 USD but is reduced to 666. it says it was purchased from "a now defunct valley in Old City Philly."
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
it can happen to you: the song you've been waiting for a studio version of since april has stylistic use of autotune
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
one of my signature pieces of clothing is becoming literally threadbare in places and i need to retire it but i truly have gotten such wear out of it :( so depressing
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
reading about bari weiss trying to woo chris cuomo to cbs news and double checking the date but no, we didn't travel back in time to five years ago. if this were 2021, i would think wow, aggressive moves at cbs. but it's 2026, so it's just embarrassing this is the extent of her imagination.
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
there is no real emmerdale bluesky for me to interact with so this message is for no one but me in the future, but while i am definitely sad and shocked that our king jimmy king is getting killed off this week after a legendary two decade run, this decision is absolutely going to reinvigorate nicola
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jordan @jordantyranny.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
"I'm sure of my talent and I'm sure of my love for life."
do you ever feel that you're a joke

all these years, the people thought the joke was on me, but the joke's actually been on the public

i'm sure of myself as a person, I'm sure of my talent and I'm sure of my love for life. I like the person I am, so I can afford to around with makeup and clothes because i'm secure with myself.
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Gabby M Reads Books @ghmcgregor.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Honoring Dolly's memory by making a donation to support her incredible Imagination Library program donate.imaginationlibrary.com
donate.imaginationlibrary.com
Home
Make a donation and support Dolly Parton's Imagination Library in communities around the world and help put more books into the hands of more children.
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✨💜 king 💜✨ @king-reinhardt.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
How about this: Instead of hyping up the piece of shit TERF queen and her exceedingly mid books, we point kids in the direction of K.A. Applegate and her fantastic, terrifying Animorphs series?
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JJ in DC @jjindc.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
“I know this is going to sound extremely radical, or crazy,” she recounted telling the woman, “but ICE is there at the gate, and they're looking for you."
time.com
ICE Is Asking Gate Agents To Help Arrest Passengers. Some Are Pushing Back
An airline manager warned a passenger that ICE agents were waiting at her gate, helping her avoid a possible arrest.
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
i will be devastated the day whoever maintains the hall & oates hotline decides to let it lapse. it's the only contact i carry over phone to phone just in case i need to test if i have service and don't want to bother anyone
image of iPhone call to a contact called "Callin' Oates"
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
lord, please let me retire from serving as tech support for my parents
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
my cat's full name is smidgey; we call her smidge. i only just realized we only call her smidgey when we're disappointed in her and want her to know, like she's our rebellious teenage daughter we're addressing by full name
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
does everyone have a specific taxonomy of when they use heart emojis and what each one means or is that just me
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
nct 127 decided to have their first comeback in years and said you know what? leave nothing behind. and that includes going all in on making sure you know johnny should be on some kind of sexiest man alive list. dear god?
Johnny from NCT in front of a red wall with posters referencing previous albums. he is wearing a plaid hoodie, unzipped, with nothing underneath but a couple necklaces. his hair is short and bleached. he smolders.Johnny from NCT, shirtless, lying down. the photo is a profile from head to upper chest, raising an arm up. his hair is white with black roots and very short. he stares upward.
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
just one of those days where you explain the concept of nutritional yeast to your elderly parents
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Ernie Smith @ernie.tedium.co · 04/08/2026
I must inform you that Rebecca Black’s “Friday” just went platinum, according to the RIAA. www.riaa.com/gold-platinu...
Rebecca Black’s certification for Friday, announced last week
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
hell is a thread of before and after on ozempic selfies where the before is a thin woman in her twenties and the after is a REALLY thin woman in her twenties
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
happy to know that sailor moon and i got that knee pain in common
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
sometimes i think about how katie holmes made sure she was papp'd every month for a year in new york so when she fled her marriage she could have a valid case for filing there instead of in california. we really don't give her enough credit.
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
me: apple tv is down (after thirty minutes of troubleshooting so my father can watch ted lasso) dad: maybe if i... me: apple tv is down dad: and then if i— me: apple tv is down dad: yeah mom: we heard you me: but he just keeps trying to fix it!!!!
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
when my mom first moved to philly in the early '70s, she turned on action news one night and the opening went "and the big story tonight... the phillies win!" it was a random regular season game, and she thought wtf is this place
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
what a day to be a philadelphian!
two notifications from the athletic. the first, two hours old, is about the sixers' title chances now that they have signed lebron james. the second, from thirty-four minutes ago, says tony tomo (former cowboys quarterback) was arrested on suspicion of driving while intoxicated.
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
lesson learned: do not take meds on empty stomach if you don't feel hungry. absolutely do not do it.
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Abraham Gutman @abgutman.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
Help us. We are fighting for a fair contract that protects The Philadelphia Inquirer's journalism, our livelihoods, and our healthcare. We need you. If you value local news and what we do, *please* sign and share our petition: phillynewsguild.com Let our management know we are not alone.
phillynewsguild.com
Fair Contract Now — NewsGuild of Greater Philadelphia
Sign the petition. Stand with Philadelphia Inquirer workers fighting for a fair contract.
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
on the one hand, appreciate that fbmp knows that i have an eye. on the other, who is stupid enough to buy this new let alone used
facebook marketplace listing for a "beautiful, lightly used" hermès epopee pull along horse. the seller is asking $980 and claims it is a "great heirloom"
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
the king of the hill menopause episode is a perfect example of how the show has changed with time and yet stayed the same at heart and i wouldn't have it any other way
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
a positive mindset, day one: i did not kill myself today
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Æ @alexandra-ewing.bsky.social · 20/07/2026
i'm not the biggest follower of the royals but it is absurd to me how obvious it is when camilla's people talk to the press, and how she's never called on it. the authors always sound like they want to be her tampon.
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