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Brad Ford

@21814615184.bsky.social
61 followers 162 following 407 posts

my life is like a mystery novel where I am both the detective and the victim and the killer

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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 19/04/2024
I'm 3 years old
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 10/04/2024
dogs 4 dinner
two plain hot dogs with a side of french fries
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 08/04/2024
my cat just started talking in a language neither of us know but both of us understand
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 20/03/2024
Good morning, baseball
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Hunter Felt @hunterfelt.bsky.social · 20/03/2024
Hello baseball
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 18/03/2024
omg it's vietnam
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 18/03/2024
There's a bush outside my apartment that is home to dozens of rats. I Call it the rat bush. I have come to view it as a minor nature deity and I rely on its sage advice. I ask "oh rat bush, do I truly deserve affection?" The rat bush squeaks en masse. I say "you're right rat bush, I am worthy of love!" The rat bush squeaks, seemingly in agreement.
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 17/03/2024
A Jewish man holds out a contract and says to an Italian man "Time to finally sign this binding agreement between Jews and Italians." Contract reads "Agreement between all Jewish and Italian Peoples. 1. We can play each other in Movies/TV. 2. We're weird about out mothers. 3. Joint custody of Macho Man Randy Savage." The Jewish and Italian man both sign the document. An overjoyed Macho Man Randy Savage comes up behind them, embraces them both and says "Ooh Yeeah"
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 15/03/2024
"himility"
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Del - Martian Observer @martian-observer.net · 15/03/2024
A Mexican artist has used cranes to drop a nine-ton sculpture of an Olmec head onto a Tesla 3 uk.news.yahoo.com/mexican-arti...
uk.news.yahoo.com
Mexican artist crushes Tesla under giant stone head
A giant stone head resembling an ancient Indigenous sculpture sits on top of a crushed Tesla car."Look what I do to your lousy car with this wonderful head.
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gita “the formalist” jackson @xoxogossipgita.bsky.social · 15/03/2024
As promised: I’ve never played Final Fantasy VII. It’s complicated. aftermath.site/final-fantas...
aftermath.site
The Very Dumb Reason Why I Can't Play Final Fantasy VII - Aftermath
I want to make it clear that this is one of the dumber things that has ever happened to me, and that it also happened when I was sixteen.
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 15/03/2024
Lucy pulls the football away from a running Charlie Brown who flings himself into the air while saying AAUGH!. Instead of landing, Charlie Brown drifts further into the sky. He says "haha yes, it is finally happening..." He goes up further and says "I am ascending to the real of God to take my fated place at his right hand." He is now a speck in the atmosphere and says "this is the reward for my endless suffering! This is my reward!!" Lucy looks on the whole time in awed disbelief.
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J Wolfgang Goerlich @jwgoerlich.bsky.social · 14/03/2024
Shel Silverstein doesn’t get nearly enough credit for predicting ChatGPT.
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 14/03/2024
frutiger pharaoh
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 13/03/2024
USUALLY IIII AM bricked up noxious too Dutch but I love you like you need me to imperfect for you
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KOTH Screens @kothscreens.bsky.social · 13/03/2024
Screenshot from King of the Hill Season 11, Episode 8
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 10/03/2024
A vacantly smiling man is applying to mortar to a brick. Another man, also vacantly smiling, stares out from behind an unfinished hole in a brick wall. The man applying the mortar says "whatup gamers? we're doing the cask of amontillado challenge." The man behind the wall says "remember to like, comment & subscribe." The mortar man lays down a brick. The hole in the wall gets smaller, the man behind it still smiling with a blank expression in his eyes. The wall is complete. The man's face is now obscured.
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𝕲𝖔𝖉𝖎𝖛𝖆 𝕲𝖍𝖔𝖚𝖑 @godivaghoul.bsky.social · 10/03/2024
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merr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 10/03/2024
About to throw it all away for a girl who looks like this
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 09/03/2024
A man says "yes, it's true. I was a test tube baby. He then points to a man with a conical body and says "and Jim here was an erlenmeyer flask baby."
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Penelope @sovietgodcomplex.bsky.social · 07/03/2024
counselor Deanna Trio from Star Trek TNG saying "Respect is earned, not bestowed"
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Possum Acquainter @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 05/03/2024
my best friend the Worm Emperor keeps telling me I'm not his favorite ghola of myself. Just dropping things like "23rd ghola had prettier eyes" or "you're almost as funny as 23rd ghola." Well buddy maybe you shouldn't've smashed 23 with your big worm tail. I don't need this frickin shit
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 07/03/2024
screenshot of a tumblr post by foxhardt which reads: "you dont have to be a parent to understand the horror of walking into a room to discover that the baby crawled out of his crib and onto that pottery wheel you forgot to turn off, and while the baby is spinning around and around, the dog is sitting there all calm, like a person, gently using his paws to fashion the babys soft cartilage head into something a little more modern.  it might be the classic tale of bad parenting, but lets see where the dog is going with this"
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 07/03/2024
who will become.... the world's first Smellionaire
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 04/03/2024
she's going to be in da new TRON and maybe everything is going to be OK
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Jon Bois @jonbois.bsky.social · 02/03/2024
check out the latest trends in tech
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 01/03/2024
milkshake truck
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 29/02/2024
oh yeah. duh. stupid.
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 28/02/2024
A man stands outside a big hollowed out onion in an idyllic country setting. He narrates "I live in a big onion." We see him inside his cozy onion home, reading in an armchair, a cup of coffee beside him. His bed is perched on a whimsical loft. He continues "I am always crying. Not from the onion fumes. But because I have achieved the dream of home owenership."
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 26/02/2024
AoM Egyptian Theme 10 Hours 1.5x Speed Check It Out
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anna !!! :) 🇵🇸🌸✨🌸🇵🇸 @frogs4girls.bsky.social · 26/02/2024
a US air force servicemember self-immolated in front of the israeli embassy while screaming “free palestine”. the fact that this wasn’t reported at all by any major news organization is. enraging.
a still from the video of the man self immolating
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Brad Ford @21814615184.bsky.social · 24/02/2024
ides of march soon, I'm sure nobody on here is going to be fucking annoying about that at all
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Screamer Jim @screamerjim.bsky.social · 24/02/2024
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 24/02/2024
There is a man with wild eyes, cove red in blood, who is handling a lumpy sack that is also dripping with blood. Two passers-by notice him. One says "hey man, we're gonna call 911." The bloody man says in a chilling voice "steamed hams." The passers-by give him a thumbs up. One says "oh shit. you know the Simpsons? Never mind. You're cool."
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Jill Krajewski @jillkrajewski.bsky.social · 24/02/2024
diane, it’s twin peaks day
Diane, 11:30 a.m., February 24th.
Entering the town of Twin Peaks.
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