iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 22/08/2025

When you're terribly upset over changes to an advertising logo that never had any purpose other than to manipulate you into buying stuff, you didn't only swallow the bait, you digested it, shat it out, and then ate it again.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 22/08/2025

I bet they wouldn't be raiding John Bolton's house if he was hiding the Epstein files...

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 21/08/2025

I'll procrastinate later.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 20/08/2025

The main thing I like about badminton is picturing the person who invented it trying to talk people into trying it out with them.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 11/08/2025

Little known historical fact: Horst Wessel also used to go by the nickname "Big Balls."

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 05/08/2025

@dailykos.com Y'all have the most head-hunting, biased, touchy, agenda-driven moderation staff of any website I'm on. Consider the way you treat your loyal users next time you go begging for money, because you have people there with personal dislikes who clearly abuse their power.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 05/08/2025

Did you know you can just make things up? Yep, you can. You know who told me that? A Martian ninja.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

My advice is, go around your neighborhood offering people fifteen dollars for their house. You never know who's crazy and stupid.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 25/07/2025

I'm not trying to say that my co-worker is weird, but whenever she doesn't come to work we all figure she's probably off somewhere sewing a playsuit for a chicken.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 18/07/2025

It's worth learning to forge your co-worker's handwriting just to write "my farts" on the lid of a Tupperware container to hide on their desk where somebody'll find it.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 08/07/2025

Never "assume" anything, because you know what happens when you assume? Yep, you make an ASS out of YOU, you IDIOT.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 03/07/2025

I'm giving away free birds today. They're all over the place, in trees and bushes, hopping through the grass.. you just have to catch 'em and they're yours. You're welcome!

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 26/06/2025

Imagine being so astronomically fucking awful that a song like this comes out and EVERYBODY knows what it's referring to, even without hints? It's the feel-good hit of the summer! www.youtube.com/watch?v=41NO...

youtube.com

Malört & Savior - On The Day It Finally Happens

YouTube video by Malört and Savior

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 13/06/2025

The reason Pete Hegseth is a drunk is because he tried to play that game where you do a shot every time Pete Hegseth says the word "warfighter." My hope for you all is that you may someday find someone you love as much as Hegseth loves the saying the goofy word "warfighter."

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 06/06/2025

It's a shame they can't both fall out ALL the windows...

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 05/06/2025

I hope they fucking kill each other. Watching them fight is like seeing somebody with a turd in each hand start clapping. (The fun thing is, I don't even have to say who I'm talking about, you already know.)

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 04/06/2025

Wow, Trump sure is mad about this "TACO" thing. He doesn't like being called a "taco." Wait 'til "Trump Ultimately Reverses Decisions" becomes popular...

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 27/05/2025

If it walks like a duck and it talks like a duck it might be my Uncle Bert and he forgot to take his pills.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 22/05/2025

You can learn kung fu the same way you make a statue. You just have to stop doing everything that isn't kung fu.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 22/05/2025

The Good Ship Lollipop was from back in the days when the Navy didn't yet understand the importance of projecting a tough image.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 16/05/2025

One thing's glaringly obvious: Trump would bellycrawl a mile through wet dung to have the approval of any of the celebrities he insults. Only one thing has ever mattered in his miserable, pitiful life, and that's the approval of famous people. He's chased it his entire life. It obsesses him.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 15/05/2025

(this is true) Well THAT'S freaky... I just looked up the 1973 Walking Tall on IMDB for no particular reason, then the next site I went to I saw news that Joe Don Baker died. RIP, sir. Crazy coincidence. Back to IMDB to look up The Apprentice...

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 13/05/2025

Everybody pees in the shower. But it takes an RFK Jr. to pee in the bathtub.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 08/05/2025

My aunt is a painter. Her favorite thing to paint is birds. That's a lot harder than you think -- they'll fight you and try to escape the whole time you're dabbing it on.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 07/05/2025

I think having "Nancy Mace Only" bathrooms would solve everybody's problems. She could shut up, and nobody would have to risk walking in after she'd been in there...

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Reposted by Zwolf

donni saphire @donni.bsky.social · 06/05/2025

Life was simpler in olden times. If you saw a cool bird, you could tell that story for weeks

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 06/05/2025

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. So we know they weren't physics majors.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 05/05/2025

If you've never seen this before, take the time, trust me, it's worth it: www.youtube.com/watch?v=QsPD...

youtube.com

Doug Stanhope on nationalism

YouTube video by rollnrocksteve

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 05/05/2025

So what if I get KFC confused with the UFC? I'm still the fight champ there.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 01/05/2025

"What you doin' with that hammer?" "Gonna try to make something." "What you tryin'ta make?" "Friends." - from my romance novel

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 01/05/2025

All of you people who are in favor of copyright laws, just be aware that they're the reason you'll never get to read my novel, Chewbacca Cop.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 30/04/2025

Trump's first 100 days were just an "Aristocrats" joke without the sex.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 29/04/2025

I often wonder what the people working in overseas factories making rubber dog poop and whoopie cushions to ship over here think of American culture.

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Reposted by Zwolf

Trae Crowder @thetraecrowder.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

The irony of white supremacists

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

The bank has a digital sign showing the temperature, and the gas station has a digital sign showing gas prices, and sometimes I forget where I'm driving and think it's 318 degrees out there.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 25/04/2025

If my co-worker had five fewer I. Q. points, she'd be batting around a ball of yarn. If she had ten fewer I. Q. points, she'd BE a ball of yarn...

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 24/04/2025

Office tip: you can enhance the level of respect you get from co-workers by always carrying a hammer with you, and hefting it now and then while winking at them.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 23/04/2025

You would think that being a "person of interest" would be a GOOD thing, but it isn't.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 23/04/2025

Turns out I heard wrong and it's not "The Boo Damn You Waltz" and now I don't like it half as much as I did.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 22/04/2025

My grandpa's a lot of fun at parties, but I sure do get tired of digging up his grave every time somebody wants to have one.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

As horrible as the world is right now I'm still sorry I didn't get to hear Melania reading an Easter story aloud. I bet that was some hilariously unproductive shit. "Und zen Pee-yay-tor Rah-beet hooped ahvhay beyind zee cabbich as Fa-moor Mac Greeg-gor valked pasht vit hees shoovil!" Kids - 🤔

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

Turns out it's a really bad idea to tell a co-worker, "Out of everyone who works here, you're the easiest to draw."

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 17/04/2025

"Carrot and stick" doesn't work on me. All "stick" does is make me decide, "I'm gon' get me a bigger stick than you got." And all "carrot" does is make me say, "You have carrots? Make me a cake!"

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 16/04/2025

This isn't actually a badass black metal tee-shirt, I just sneezed while I was brushing my teeth.

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Zwolf @zwolf.bsky.social · 15/04/2025

I've been experimenting with compliments and so far the worst one seems to be "You look good from the back."

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