Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 12hShane Gillis has an extra chromosome and that extra chromosome has an extra chromosome. It’s why he doubles down on such stupid jokes. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 26/08/2026New running bit where I refuse to do any work anyone asks me to do ever again and cite the passing of Dolly Parton as the reason. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 08/08/2026I encourage you all to stream folk punk music videos on YouTube while you nap so those kids can buy PBR and cigarettes. Thanks in advance. 021
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 07/08/2026Because Bari Weis keeps babies in her basement to eat. 220
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 01/08/2026static.klipy.comConfused John Travolta Meme (Vincent Vega)ALT: Confused John Travolta Meme (Vincent Vega) 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 01/08/2026In 2011 I was hit by a car and had a broken skull. My brain was bleeding. I had to take 2 life flights to get home. I still can’t smell or taste most things, but I didn’t decide to exploit the legal system for my personal gain because I would rather be dead than talk to a personal injury lawyer. 010
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 30/07/2026He’s such a little bitch I bet he sucked Max Miller off after he found out his daughter was being abused. 010
Reposted by Lung BiscuitMrs. Betty Bowers @mrsbettybowers.bsky.social · 23/07/2026Heads up: Taylor Farms lettuce is sold under these brand names: Marketside (sold at Walmart) Earthbound Farm (owned by Taylor Farms) Cross Valley Farms (owned by US Foods) Private labels for Target, Whole Foods (365), and Amazon Fresh. AVOID ALL OF THEM 705131636661
Reposted by Lung BiscuitMassimo (mirror) @rainmaker1973-m.bsky.social · 23/07/2026Dogs and their skill of befriending literally everything. Original post 944031686
Reposted by Lung BiscuitMark Hamill @markhamillofficial.bsky.social · 23/07/2026They say that admitting you are obsessed with Jimothy, the raccoon with Shortened Spine Syndrome, is the 1st step to recovery... 448134501620
Reposted by Lung Biscuit𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.lol · 23/07/2026BREAKING: Canine delivers strongest bipartisan statement of the year. 460162713328
Reposted by Lung BiscuitHoodlum 🇺🇸 @nothoodlum.bsky.social · 07/07/2026Belgium trolled the US with a savage two-word message after knocking them out of the World Cup: “Overturn this.” 489139392380
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 06/07/2026Elon has never made anything. I doubt he could draw a stick figure because he’s so fat. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 05/07/2026Congrats to T-Swift on killing everyone at her wedding. 001
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 05/07/2026She could have killed everyone there dozens of times with her jet emissions, so probably good you missed it. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 14/06/2026Could there ever be a show that captures a cultural moment as accurately as Portlandia nailed hipsterism? Or did irony-based humor kill irony? Like kids are wearing mullets and windbreakers in earnest today, and it’s throwing me because we did that shit to be clowns. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 14/06/2026Texas has never dunked on anyone. They lick boots and that’s all. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 06/06/2026The Gary Bears are a done deal, and The Bears Still Suck. 110
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 02/06/2026static.klipy.comHulk Smashing SceneALT: Hulk Smashing Scene 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 02/06/2026The only exception to this rule was Robin Williams as Genie. So good. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 02/06/2026All the cool gays moved to Tacoma. But we’ll fight you if you tell anyone. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 29/05/2026They’re never getting a QB better than Eli Manning. 000
Reposted by Lung Biscuit𝔩𝓏𝓏𝑦 - 𝔦 𝔞𝔪 𝔣𝔩𝔬𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔤 @autisticizzy.bsky.social · 29/05/2026My son grew potatoes as an experiment at school and came home with a small bag of the harvest he managed to get which he used to make baked potatoes for dinner. I am proud of my son. 🥰 20710216380
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 28/05/2026static.klipy.comParks and Rec: Calzones Betrayed MeAlt: Parks and Rec: Calzones Betrayed Me 000
Reposted by Lung BiscuitPaulley Ticks @tomadelsbach.bsky.social · 25/05/2026In honor of the true heroes on this Memorial Day, I fixed it. #DonaldTrump #MemorialDay 871213396310
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 24/05/2026I have half a mind to buy a VCR and record all of Jackass to VHS. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 23/05/2026They’re already begging. I clicked cancel and they rolled over another 6 months at $2.99. I never paid full freight on that platform. 170
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 23/05/2026He got the one-drop policy from Jim Crowe. The rest of Jim Crowe was too extreme for the Nazis. He didn’t think Germans would go for it. 180
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 23/05/2026I would like to see him try that. It would kill him. His bowels would burst inside him and he would collapse in a heap. He would sputter out. I would laugh and call every Republican congressional office to gloat. 020
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 23/05/2026the guy who is in the Epstein files can barely walk. 010
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 22/05/2026Funny. I was told this problem was already solved by some law of supply and demand where landlords without jobs get to take all the money. 020
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 22/05/2026Data center pattern baldness. Trying to make it stick. 000
Reposted by Lung BiscuitThe Tennessee Holler @thetnholler.bsky.social · 22/05/2026SPOTTED in rural Tennessee: “Iran your gas prices up” sticker⛽️ 842622606
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 22/05/2026You just had that pun and you’ve been waiting to use it. Love when a play comes together. 010
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 22/05/2026They gave me this one after I broke my skull. I did it hung over. 010
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 22/05/2026How about we slap the shit out of him now and then again later? 020
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 22/05/2026That the Brothers Grimm left gutting and skinning out of Hansel and Gretel was a gross oversight of food safety and a missed opportunity to outfit the children of Bavaria with an important life skill. However, if you just remove the head it’s all good bits in there. I like to deep fry the ears. 170
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 22/05/2026Well yeah, but Markwayne brings the average down so far by himself that even if you relocated all of Chicago, NYC, and L.A. you would have negative charisma and null intelligence for the state. That’s why you gotta take a median to compare. 040
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 21/05/2026He showed off his solar setup on Twitter. I bet everything he has is backed up on the raspberry pies he uses to control his batteries, & there’s an email list of reporters who will get terabytes of dirt automatically when a Google alert he has set for himself comes in. 010
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 21/05/2026Massie went to MIT. This is underreported, but no other Republican is even close to smart enough to get into MIT, and there’s no nepo-baby option there. He’s just a strict budget hawk, which republicans haven’t had since Bush I. 110
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 21/05/2026Don’t forget how many of them got arrested after for sex with kids. 000
Reposted by Lung BiscuitAllison Gill @muellershewrote.com · 19/05/2026So once applications open for the $1.7B slush fund, we're all going to apply and break their portal, right? 1477173764271
Reposted by Lung BiscuitAmber Woods @amberspeaks.bsky.social · 19/05/2026After reading the Epstein files something in me broke for good. I have no desire to watch Hollywood worship itself ever again. The red carpets, the galas, the celebrity machine — it all feels next level grotesque now. 🧵 39371311962
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 19/05/2026Don’t forget to spam the application process when they announce it. 000
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 17/05/2026I have to subscribe to paramount +, Fox NFL, ESPN, and Peacock already to watch the broadcast games. 010
Lung Biscuit @lungbiscuit.bsky.social · 17/05/2026It’s called being creative. Tell him it’s haute cuisine, and he’ll be the first one ever. I bet he dives in. 000
