johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 27/02/2026Is this thing on? *taps gun barrel against my temple* 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 27/02/2026I dropped the soap at Lush and all they did was ask me to leave. I was so relieved. 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 20/02/2026not to be too political but anyone else in a situationship with their sleep paralysis demon? 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 19/02/2026seems ungood that if you simply do an avalanche of crime courts can’t keep up and you get away with it but I’m not a lawyer 000
Reposted by johnFatherJohnDave Levitan @davelevitan.bsky.social · 19/02/2026Getting shown up in the arena of elite impunity by *the British monarchy* is an incredible “America at 250!” achievement 125133183405
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 18/02/2026getting bulletmaxxed after frame mogging a dozen cops lmao 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 18/02/2026It’s like falling into a septic tank and your first course of action is to floss 010
Reposted by johnFatherJohnA.R. Moxon @juliusgoat.bsky.social · 16/02/2026Everywhere this man goes he should be treated as if he murdered millions of children, because he did. 10768842284
Reposted by johnFatherJohnBrendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 16/02/2026Me as a child: it must be very hard to become a CEO and be very hard work once you get the job Guy obviously on drugs speaking at a conference: the next five years of the economy should be about a dream I had where a dog spoke to me 485339939
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 12/02/2026Happy to announce I’ve been hired as the new Piss and Shit Taster at my local Diarrhea Factory 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 12/02/2026My new character, Carrot Bottom, has audiences screaming WHY and NO and THIS LUBE IS EVERYWHERE 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 11/02/2026Child rape?!? *gestures erratically* IN THIS ECONOMY??? 010
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 05/02/2026You do not want to watch the alternative puppy bowl Kristi Noem has planned for Sunday 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 04/02/2026Watching old movies gives you a glimpse of societal norms of the past, for instance, I just watched M.(1930) and evidently people used to really hate child rapists/murderers 010
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 02/02/2026Cool so now we’ll have a few extra angles of them extrajudicially killing us 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 02/02/2026I was there, it was at an Alamo Drafthouse. I ordered jalapeño poppers, but the server told me they ran out and offered to suck my dick instead. I got kicked out for using my phone trying to twitch stream the impromptu dick suck. Oh, the movie sucked shit though. 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 02/02/2026I had no idea they meant “flood the zone with shit” to be taken literally 000
Reposted by johnFatherJohnRadley Balko @radleybalko.bsky.social · 02/02/2026The woke scolds are trying to make this about racism. But Musk is right. It's about historical and scientific integrity. When the God of Thunder disguises himself as a swan to seduce and fuck a queen and the resulting baby hatches from an egg, *of course* the baby will be white. It's just science.independent.co.ukElon Musk claims Christopher Nolan has lost ‘integrity’ over The Odyssey castingLupita Nyong’o is reportedly set to play Helen of Troy in Nolan’s upcoming adaptation of Homer’s epic poem 23564011146
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 01/02/2026I don’t know how much of an appetite there is for a #NotAllBillionaires movement… 010
Reposted by johnFatherJohnRose Schmits @roseschmits.bsky.social · 31/01/2026Seeing how shite the elites are at writing emails you start to see why they think gen ai is magic and the bees knees 241798
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 31/01/2026Curtis Yarvin moping around despondent that he’s not in the Epstein files and everybody knows it 001
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 31/01/2026kinda weird that an occupational hazard of being a billionaire is being friends with pedophiles 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Tesla’s Optimus robots will never talk back to you, reject you in any way, or even request to leave the island 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 30/01/2026If you’re psyched about Don Lemon’s arrest and want to celebrate with like-minded patriots near you just google LEMON PARTY for deets 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Many people refer to Thiel as a reptilian, but they’re clearly not herpetologists. Thiel’s skin is required to be moist at all times because he breathes via cutaneous respiration as he is an amphibian, perhaps a lungless salamander. 010
Reposted by johnFatherJohnRob (the floor one) @floorisbed.bsky.social · 29/01/2026gavin newsom is like if chuck schumer knew what the internet is 758755
Reposted by johnFatherJohnceeks @ceeks.bsky.social · 29/01/2026“we know you’re eating a hot dog” 311111125
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026make ICE so toxic we need to come up with a new way to describe frozen water 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026New: Tulsi Gabbard on an odyssey to gather all seven dragon balls to raise Roy Cohn from the dead 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Aranosfky’s AI revolutionary war movie is a spiritual sequel to Pi because upon watching it you will desperately attempt to give yourself a lobotomy 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026slammed my corolla hybrid’s door on my penis again smdh 010
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026in retrospect, we are all lucky that Trump meeting Mamdani didn’t trigger a matter/anti-matter explosion destroying the entire solar system 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026I used to have to tediously roam the streets looking for people to ridicule me for having a fat, full diaper, but now? Thanks to Claude Code and an hour of vibe coding I now have a website poop.baby where anyone can go and get live real-time updates to my location and diaper status! 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026*stage falls at the Target self checkout* “Owww my splorg!” *thrashing on the ground in silence* *gets up, dusts self off* “Haha there’s no such organ as a splorg! You rubes! You self-content idiots! Anyway, like and subscribe!” 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Sipping coffee, taking a break from all the atrocities at home by reading up on all the atrocities abroad. Breathe in. Exhale. Repeat. 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 28/01/2026we will need a Reifenstahl like documentary about the making of Melania 000
Reposted by johnFatherJohnrev. howard arson @theophite.bsky.social · 28/01/2026we are going to need to prosecute all the people who paid bribes to Trump. 181358185
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 27/01/2026jaggin off with my boys to the melania doc in the brozone lair 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 27/01/2026The least we can do is get some Slippery When Fascist cones to litter around downtown to give people a heads up 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 27/01/2026Rolling coal premium add-on for Tesla Cybertruck with Coal-as-a-Service(CaaS) subscription just $39,999 one-time installation fee and $249.99/month 000
johnFatherJohn @johnfatherjohn.bsky.social · 27/01/2026Not only that, but we will integrate this database with Tinder, Grindr, Craigslist, whatever, and we will assure you that everyone listed gets a lot of compensatory sex, just absolutely drowning in fluids, death throes of the Roman Empire levels of debauchery. 000
