ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 8hme, alone, baked on the back porch: what is that? is that a weird squirrel? no is that a... chipmunk? no. that's a crunchy leaf. yes. OH SHIT ITS A BIRD 150
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 14hlooking to acquire the red and green stick from a brazilian restaurant... but instead of saying yes or no to meats, it's for my desk at work to let you know whether or not it's safe to speak to me. 181
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 17hcashier: what size coffee would you like? me: medium is fine, I don't have the butthole capacity for a large. cashier, to my friend: and what size is your butthole? 3269
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 21hme, looking at a beautiful person's selfie: god, it must be nice to be beautiful. I bet you're not even cool, I bet you're hard to have conversation with because your dark eyes are deep pools I want to dive into. disgusting. must be friggin NICE, dumb beautiful bitch! 0144
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 30/09/2026me, disgusted: did you just raise the roof?! 1152
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 29/09/2026[at chilis this weekend] waiter: what can I get you guys to start? me, looking at his name tag: let's get MARG'D UP, MARK! mark: wait... do I know you? me: mark, mark, mark, you're wearing a name tag and I need a margarita 191
Reposted by ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 15/03/2025maybe we would all feel better if we spread Elmer's glue all over our hands and peeled it off when it dried 1116644
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Autism Powers: international man of hyperfixation 0143
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 29/09/2026commercials used to be memorable. make 7, up yours? scary quiznos creatures? kia hamsters that dance? not to mention every mentos commercial was batshit. if we're gonna keep doing capitalism, can we make it tolerable again? 3110
Reposted by ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋLakeview Dispensary @lakeviewdispo.bsky.social · 27/09/2026#NewStrainSunday: Jedi Blunt Plug. The force is inside you. 033
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 26/09/2026cop: that's the wrong direction me: wrong direction was the name of my boy band cop: step out of the car 193
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 26/09/2026you look like you're not getting the recommended daily amount of something 1102
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 26/09/2026beautiful bean footage is the name of my sex tape 1122
Reposted by ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋbrent @murrman5.bsky.social · 25/09/2026trying to appear more likeable to the court room by calling it a caper instead of life insurance fraud 28817
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 25/09/2026I'm on a mini road trip to see my bff and the scenery is waaaay better than scrolling 0120
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 24/09/2026I don't need anybody to walk a mile in my shoes, but I do think you should experience one strand of my long hair in your buttcrack 382
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 24/09/2026us: would you like your husband clean shaven or do you have any specifics how you'd like him to look for his viewing? wife: clean shaven please [later] wife: where is his mustache?! he's had that our whole marriage! 2100
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 24/09/2026because I'm a child of god, my favorite snack is original lays chips dipped briefly in water 681
Reposted by ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋfarner @farnerb0cken.bsky.social · 23/09/2026[getting swallowed by a giant whale] are you deadass 818426
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 23/09/2026religion: god gave you free will bc he loves you me: *uses it* religion: immediately hell 48923
Reposted by ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋTanya @tanya.bsky.social · 22/09/2026it probably feels so good to get corrupted by power 2357
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 22/09/2026she oozed on my onomatopoeia til I squelched 2136
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 21/09/2026whenever I'm feeling down, I think about the time I made an army ranger cry and it lifts me right back up 0145
Reposted by ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋchris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 21/09/2026And I would eat 500 tortillas And I would eat 500 more Just to be the body they said interesting things about at the morgue 824266
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 21/09/2026deadbeat daughter would be a sick band name 0121
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 21/09/2026having a puppy is almost exactly like having a 2 year old. pissing and shitting wherever, putting shit in their mouths that doesn't belong there, not listening nor really understanding, adorable in order to avoid death. 0132
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 19/09/2026I bet the liquid inside a highlighter tastes like christmas mountain dew 1235
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 18/09/2026my ancient receptionist should lie down and die instead of being the oldest mean girl alive 091
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 18/09/2026what makes you think you're good enough to think about me 173
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 17/09/2026they're gonna shit in the drinking water tomorrow 071
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 17/09/2026we are the biggest idiots and morons per capita 1154
Reposted by ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋLakeview Dispensary @lakeviewdispo.bsky.social · 17/09/2026You ever get so high you just make up words? Me neither. JEEF. 284
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 17/09/2026[reading together in a silent room] my dude outta nowhere: kinda wish my dad would die me: lmaooooo 090
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 16/09/2026acquaintance (text): Jesus loves you!!! me: who can blame him 152
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 16/09/2026What scene makes you emotional no matter how many times you see it?static.klipy.comFedup PissedAlt: Steel Magnolias: the cemetery scene 150
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 16/09/2026him: *rubbing my back in circles me: *surprise burps* did you... just burp me 1132
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 16/09/2026can people stop fucken dying for a couple days so I can catch up holy SHIT 091
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 16/09/2026bills keep coming once a month like bad pms 0102
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 16/09/2026you guys, I'm obsessed with soup cubes. this week has been soup week at my house and we always have extra that we can never quite finish before it's past its prime! so, we freeze it in soup cubes and each cube is one serving! 470
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 15/09/2026quit saying hypothetical shit to literal people 1142
ϝɾιɠɠιɳϝɾҽɳƈԋ @frigginfrench.bsky.social · 15/09/2026my coworker just gave me this, never been happier 1275