Sign in

tall jim 🐀

@criteval.bsky.social
158 followers 173 following 521 posts

very very tall

PostsRepliesMedia
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Big Joel @bigjoel.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
me on day 201
1354520
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @dumbmike.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
I just easily gave birth without any pain or fuss. As a progressive, I truly hate to say it, but I think women have been Faking this whole time for attention.
0635
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
This is beautiful. I’m so happy for your beautiful life.
010
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
I’m crying, this is the worst ending I’ve ever read. “Dramatic pause” lmao
020
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
mammon @derekhill.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
devastated pronounced like demonstrative. but only if you pronounce demonstrative the way i do
0207
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Sam Frantics @dsoart.com · 03/10/2026
In Xanada did Kubla Khan A stately pleasure foam debris
252463
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
time fow a vewy scawy monf
000
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @dumbmike.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
I thought this was just beautiful. Kurt Vonnegut takes a walk to mail a letter:
She calls out, “Where are you going?” And I say, “I am going out to get an envelope.” And she says, “Well, you’re not a poor man. Why don’t you buy a thousand envelopes? They’ll deliver them, and you can put them in a closet.” And I say, “Hush.”

I go next to the postal convenience center down the block at the corner of 47th Street and Second Avenue. The woman behind the counter says, “Thirty-nine cents for a stamp.” I say, “I only brought thirty-seven. When did that change?” She looked at me a long time. “Thirty-seven isn’t enough.” “Well that oughta be enough for one envelope,” I said. The line was getting longer. 

The lady moved her hand into her coat. I knew this routine. I backflipped behind the man behind me in line, wrapping my elbow around his throat as I landed. By the time the stamp seller had unloaded her clip, I had full cover. The gentleman’s body dropped to the floor, six holes smoking. The package he was carrying fell to the floor with a heavy clunk. Whatever was in there, it would do. 

I rolled my foot over the cardboard and did a “flick up” as they call it in soccer. I bounced the package once or twice on the back of my foot as the mail lady reloaded, then I launched it high and spun 360 to deliver my patented “Rising Phoenix kick”. The package caught fire as it shattered through the protective plexiglass window and struck the woman’s head with all the force and hatred I had learned to channel in my grueling tutelage under five fallen Wudang masters in my youth. The lady’s body exploded off of her bones, leaving just a blackened skeleton spinning in her office chair. “So it goes,” I said, but no one laughed. I guess they weren’t big readers.

And I go home. And I have had one hell of a good time.

We are dancing animals. How beautiful it is to get up and go out and do something. We are here on Earth to fart around. Don’t let anybody tell you any different.
211300343
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
when the cat’s away,, the mice will slay 💃
001
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth / The minor frog, the major lift / The baffled king composing hallelaura
000
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
I heard there was a secret chord / that Dylan played, and it pleased the lord / But you don’t really care for the gecs, do ya
100
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
What is The Gentle Giant?
100
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
What is Albuquerque?
000
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
What is a tick-toffee (ticked-off-y)?
000
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
👏👏👏👏👏
010
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
The only correct opinion
000
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Fared Al Mahlool | فريد المحلول @faredalmahlool.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
This video was filmed in Palestine. My heart struggles to comprehend such cruelty and the heartbreaking disregard for human life. No human being should have to endure this.
5629441400
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
What is Theater, I barely know her?
030
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
What is Bee-tlejuice 🐝?
100
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Who is Morty?
111
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Yeah, I first saw it on my friend’s phone and she was like “What is this shit? I swear I didn’t buy it.” We made fun of the fact that her mom probably downloaded it on there.
010
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Ben Collins @bencollins.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
25 years later and The Onion’s ParentCorner 9/11 explainer from immediately after the attack is a better understanding of the threat environment than the one produced by the U.S. government.
An Onion article titled “Talking to your child about the WTC attack,” which is filled with real good info.
7258081130
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
more mr. spice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
from the lowliest worm to the mightiest worm, the ground is home to a vast hierarchy of worms
31244260
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Writer for NBC10 Boston fuckin HATES Mercury
943603457
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
josh boo-erman 👻 @bosh.worstpossible.world · 04/08/2026
thrilled as i am to see the 9/11 high school gymnastic routine do the rounds again, it doesn’t hold a candle to the 9/11 middle school interpretive dance set to the music of lmfao
2640699
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
realizing truths (cotton eye Joe is hyperpop)
001
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Charlie Kirk a year ago: hey let’s move the meeting necks weak
021
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
kate bush’s husband @airbagged.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Charlie Kirk C
Corre
@charliekirk11
X.com
Today is one of my favorite days of the year.
81150252
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
plumbus
010
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Who is Teddy Roosevelt?
110
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 08/09/2026
For years, New Yorkers have demanded access to City records about the lasting health impacts of the horrific September 11th attacks. For years, they have been denied and ignored. That ends today. nyc.gov/sept11docs
nyc.gov
September 11 Docs
402265026436
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
What is banj-boozled?
000
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
What is oral performance?
101
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Patrick Wyman @patrickwyman.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Realizing the extent to which this is true wildly changed my opinions about how to deal with Trumpism, since they're never going to be satisfied unless they're actively dominating everyone else. You can't give them some concessions and go back to the status quo: they're reactionary revolutionaries.
5151681312
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
What is Reagan Is Nefarious?
000
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
What is the Meeting of the Minds?
100
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Who is Hobbes ❤️❤️❤️?
100
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Where is Selma?
100
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Tim Clare @timclare.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
This is the oldest* surviving Snakes & Ladders board in the world. Specifically, it's Gyan Chaupar, the Game of Knowledge. It's from the late 18th Century, but the game is much older - paper & cloth are not resilient media. The ladders represent virtue, the snakes vice. The scorpions are decorative.
A Gyan Chaupar paper board with long snakes, ladders, & some scorpions
932774
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
What is Mr Snorldwide (snail worldwide)?
100
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
What is a prongful conviction?
120
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
What is Sweden?
010
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
there’s no ailment internet attention can’t cure ✨
000
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
coyote vs acme reignited my mothering instinct (desire to get a dog)
020
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
one day I want a friend as supportive as the roadrunner
000
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
the only thing keeping me going is endless jeopardy
000
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
What is Fly Me To The (Bent) Spoon?
100
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
What is Crunchy Insect Chirping Among Dense Arbors?
130
Reposted by tall jim 🐀
Rodger Sherman @rodger.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Sorry it just occurred to me that there may be people who haven’t seen clip from the Quibi show where Rachel Brosnahan plays a woman dying because of her golden prosthetic arm and I needed to fix that
21248171367
tall jim 🐀 @criteval.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
why did no one tell me I have to do homework (watch some shit called Gen V) for season 4 of The Boys
000