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Cosmos Lionheart

@cosmoslionheart.bsky.social
6.2K followers 1.3K following 23K posts

Possibly a human being, although every day brings more doubt as to whether or not I'm actually several escaped denizens of the dungeon dimension stacked in a trenchcoat

PostsRepliesMedia
Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 10h
trickster god of questionable farts
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ً @zan.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
u ever think about how Grimes is the reason we're on Bluesky rn
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
we regret to inform you that all moderators for the sonic discord have already committed seppuku
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
wake the fuck up, samurai we have a sonic discord to moderate
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
begging and pleading for the rest of the planet to put my horrid diseased nation out of our misery
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
refusing to buy insurance from the companies with the most annoying commercials and let's just say 😏 i've been driving illegally
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
launching a bucket containing the remains of jim bakker into the sun
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flamby ✨🐝 @flamby666.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
reviews include "smells like oatmeal in a sexual way"
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francis @dilfkink.kindboys.online · 05/10/2026
Woman with radiant smile happily pressing a button labeled IMMANENTIZE for a device labeled ESCHATRON 9000
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
got a couple proper older gents taking me to the machine that stretches the taffy to age me into my long balls tomorrow
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
please understand that i'd been forced to read a bunch of dillo poasts, your honor
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
just now learning from the libs that tom morello's aversion to going fully coconut-pilled is responsible for every bad thing happening at the moment yikes 😬
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
dave matthews dumped one bus load of shit into a river years ago and we still hear about it but taylor swift drops dooks on the poor from her private plane every damn day and not a word
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Jana H-S (she, like a knife) @jana-aych-ess.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
snuffbait frog disappointed when scorpion keeps her word
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farner @farnerb0cken.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
men who sacrifice liberty for bibberty deserve neither
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
that feeling when you realize ALL the muppets fuck hard
static.klipy.com
Drums
Alt: The Muppet Animal playing drums like the sexy sexy frantic beast he is
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
i'm starting to question whether you actually even do power poop lunches, broski
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🙋‍♂️HumanBuddy💁‍♂️ @budbuddyguy.sheshed.lol · 05/10/2026
I was a huge fan of the anti-establishment band until they refused to vote for my establishment candidate. Now I think they're stinky and bad 😡
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
puppet me like one of your muppets, mr. henson
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
i get chubbed up for morning oatmeal EVERY GODDAMN DAY, LINDA
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 01/10/2023
Cenobite: We have such sights to show you Me: Lemme guess, is it more freaks doing pleasure/pain weird sexy blood stuff? Cenobite: .....yeah.... Me: Is that all ya got? Cenobite: We'll tear your soul apart Me: Like everything else in the world? Real original dude
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tunes to make you run away @whippoorwont.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
when Pinhead is like "demons to some, angels to others" idk what kind of people consider them angels but i bet most of them are on tumblr
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
real allies would be prepared to shoot a video essayist right now if they so much as disrespected a woman
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
"CONSUMERS. MUST. CONSUME." i growl as i force another handful of pebble filled dirt down my disgusting maw
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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
*at the bottom of the ocean This is nice.
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
i love when something bad happens and a news person is like "what does this mean for consumers?" big fan of being reminded that the only way to sustain my life and all life is through the consumption of other life except most plants i guess WHO ARE NOT TO BE TRUSTED
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
they were rare, like a zoomer that doesn't contain multiple worrying levels of horniness for officer judy hops
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
can't right now, busy telling the pope to shut the fuck up for reasons that don't suck
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
look, every single one of us has a taste for violent revolution right now, why don't we just place that order?
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
[Anubis having just weighed my heart against the feather of Maat, and moments before that heart is consumed by Ammit] "Got some bad news for you, playboi"
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
'Michael McDonald jizzed in my mom' is the new dead baby shoes suck it Hemingway
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froggher @froggher.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
courage might be a coward but he is also a real one which is a lot more than you can say about most people
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
you can stop making good decisions fyi we stopped keeping score on that shit
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
you wanna wriggle around and slap each other's naughty bits?
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Amy Vants to Suck Your Blood 🩸 @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
i’m never gonna dance again, guilty feet cause a gravitational incident that disrupts the tides and strands sea creatures
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 15/05/2026
constantly pointing out that pete buttigieg is a weird little rat fuck freak created in the lab that pumps out neoliberal monsters whose sole purpose is cradling capitalism's balls is homophobic beeteedubs so maybe tone down the contempt
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 14/08/2025
a whole lotta leftists saying they refuse to ever vote for that rat fuck pete buttigieg but we'll see where they at when they need to get on that incomprehensible word salad shit
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
maybe you heard the zombie groans and thought them nothing more than an auditory manifestation of the brain hungers but i heard a sad echo of my own yearnings
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
skeets have always been battlefields
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
finally watched that master and commander movie so many of you seem to really like low key kinda sucks, gang
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Jana H-S (she, like a knife) @jana-aych-ess.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
your mission is simple: forcefem the pope
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
if i don't post some stupid bullshit at least once a day then the mods win
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
returning to the manor to find that you have one again despoiled my domicile with another of your preposterous pudding fights
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🎃Nosferascoob🎃 @scoobydouchebag.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
One day you stand up and it's the last time ever that you don't make old man noises when you stand up
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
hey do you mind asking your grandma how much puss she thinks bruce campbell crushed?
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
OG gooners know
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
them winchester boys're dickin down demons something fierce again
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Cosmos Lionheart @cosmoslionheart.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
they're making me sacrifice the love of my life for the lives of everyone in the city i defend tomorrow pretty broken up about it
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