Sign in

Chelly 🪿

@chellygoose.bsky.social
274 followers 274 following 661 posts

♐️☀️♑️🌙♉️🌅 ✨🩷💜💙✨🏳️‍🌈 35 she/they 🔞 MDNI Navigating life with one hand on my Penedict Cannabatch 🍃💨 the other holding snacks.

PostsRepliesMedia
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
OP: Asks a question about why boomers don’t seem interested in what others are talking about and tend to make things about themselves? Comment section: A bunch of boomers trying to defend boomers while…. not being interested in what the OP is talking about and making it about themselves.
040
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
Is there such thing as semi-permanent armpit sparkles?
040
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
Dr: And what do we do when we’re tired? Me: Pop a Vyvanse, chug a Red Bull and become tomorrow’s problem?
240
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
Boo B 👻🐝 @vtbee80.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
using my old NES zapper to shoot the ducks off of jeep dashboards
0225
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
If I try to post something here that had more than enough characters elsewhere and suddenly bluesky has me breaking it up into a million different parts I just don’t even bother. Come find me on Threads.
041
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 14/06/2026
Lift with your pussy, not your back
0216
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 28/05/2026
My life as a goose according to me… Wake up already mad Scream at the sun for no reason Eat half a hot dog out of a parking lot puddle Chase a jogger Terrorize some golfers Take a shit directly in the path of a family trying to enjoy nature Honk in the face of a child Steal an entire sandwich
150
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
A friend that knows how to request a video chat from me.
Screenshot of a text message that says “happy weekend when is a good time for you to be perceived ???”
0171
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 10/05/2026
Too realistic for meta apparently. 🙄 I draw more than just doodles. Yes mine. 💋
0150
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
Let me get a taste of your peach doughnut 🍑🍩
180
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
Does anyone have the 4-1-1 on today’s date?
040
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
Find your “what the fuck are you talking about?” Pacers girlfriend energy and make the day your bitch.
030
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
mothra stewart @gorl.gay · 11/04/2026
you think they all look at eachother and say nice in unison when it's 69 seconds until they land
25813
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
👻 L.T. Vargus, disgraced author👻 @ltvargus.bsky.social · 10/04/2026
they should replace two factor authentication with a troll that asks you three riddles
616562
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
Opinion Editor @ Bluesky @dly.bsky.social · 10/04/2026
why did Melania say this at her press conference?
Dee Reynolds from It's Always Sunny singing the end of the Nightman Cometh. She sings "just to be clear i did not write that song and have never had sex with a child"
125113716
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
It would be so funny if aliens came out of it.
119943
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 02/04/2026
HEY EVERYOOONE 👇👇 I GOT THE JOB OFFER!!!
170
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 02/04/2026
Chelly Goose 35 from New Hampshire 🌲 Bisexual poly married mom Sagittarius sun Capricorn moon Taurus rising for anyone who likes that sort of thing. Adults only here. No minors. I post some NSFW content from time to time along with whatever else is living in my head that day.🔞
281
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
The Daily Show @thedailyshow.com · 27/01/2026
They're lying!
10554721841
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 27/01/2026
Nationwide Strike Friday, January 30th No work. No school. No shopping. www.nationalshutdown.org
040
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 06/01/2026
New flannel 👀
0110
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 31/12/2025
2026 Plans: - Be more crime - Do more gay
060
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 13/11/2025
A school bus full of kids and a ballsack full of sperm are basically the same thing. One just made it farther.
050
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 03/10/2025
Call me old-fashioned but telling me you want the sexiest kids does not make me want to marry you. 😬
060
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 27/09/2025
I can’t be a goth. I like powdered doughnuts too much.
1113
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 05/09/2025
What do you do for work? Scroll on my phone and wait for 5pm.
2136
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 31/08/2025
I really need to tone it down because every time someone says “did you hear who died?” I get way too excited.
090
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 31/08/2025
If you’re not mooing with me you’re mooing against me
170
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 31/08/2025
Not much has changed since I was a kid. I still want my friends to come over and play with me and my new toys.
0155
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
Boo B 👻🐝 @vtbee80.bsky.social · 31/08/2025
i’ve heard sleeping through the night is nice…i’d love to try it sometime
216332
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 30/08/2025
“Folks I’m here. Heaven was a disaster before me and everybody knows it. Jesus? Nice guy very weak low energy frankly. The angels are crying folks because I’m making Heaven GREAT again. Pearly gates? They’ll be gold now. Streets of gold? Even golder.”
130
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 29/08/2025
Happy Friday my little gaggle of beanlings🪿🫘 Go be the sin you wish to see in the world
3220
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 29/08/2025
Mentally hit rock bottom, physically would like to get topped.
0101
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 29/08/2025
Hi can we unpin my safe word from the top of our chat? I can’t take our conversations seriously with “oatmeal” staring at me the entire time.
040
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
Chica Marx @mckenziewark.bsky.social · 28/08/2025
Pillows have no bones.
5429
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 29/08/2025
I’ve gained more followers on my threads alt account in the last 2 weeks than I have in the last 6 months on Bluesky.
140
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
Boo B 👻🐝 @vtbee80.bsky.social · 28/08/2025
all i wanna do is eat everything all the time, never exercise, and be in great shape is that too much to ask
319866
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 28/08/2025
As much as these look and taste like skittles you should NOT devour the entire bag.
2110
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 28/08/2025
Hi sometimes I forget I have a Bluesky but as threads starts to suck more and more these days I’m going to try and bring more of my mooties over here.
170
Reposted by Chelly 🪿
Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 28/08/2025
We swore we weren’t gonna get another grandma after the last one died, but when we saw this one at the shelter, we just knew we had to have her.
An older woman sits in the back of a pickup truck.
1742971
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 18/08/2025
At some point me being hungry becomes a you problem
061
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
Whenever I take my ADHD meds Me to me: “Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?”
050
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 11/08/2025
When I say “take me out” I mean in the permanent sense.
0134
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 09/08/2025
I made it 3 miles before I threw up
050
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 09/08/2025
I got winded putting on my sports bra so this bike ride is off to a great start.
071
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 07/08/2025
If I ever get kidnapped or go missing the forensic team won’t even have to try. My habits got me coughing so hard I’m leaving DNA evidence like a damn breadcrumb trail. You’re welcome CSI.
041
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 05/08/2025
I want a dog poop Roomba for outside
020
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 05/08/2025
Thank you for prescribing me this drug I’ve totally never tried in my teens or twenties recreationally. 👀 I sure hope it works. 🤷‍♀️
082
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 31/07/2025
Mansplaining something to me while being completely wrong about it is such an interesting choice.
020
Chelly 🪿 @chellygoose.bsky.social · 30/07/2025
Sick of scheduling doctor’s appointments. I just want to make tattoo and piercing appointments.
040