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Statham Dayspring Askani’son

@askulie.bsky.social
247 followers 658 following 1.2K posts

> Portmanteau Aficionado > Fixed-width Font Advocate > Honorary PhD in TI-BASIC > Semi-professional Aspartame Connoisseur 🥤

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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
*Writing resume* “Moves like Jagger Tweets like a Toynbee Tile” send it
static.klipy.com
Man Typing on Old Computer
ALT: Man Typing on Old Computer
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 22/05/2026
Listening to crispy hi-res lossless audio on Apple Music is like taking the first sip of a McDonald’s fountain Sprite after drinking a lifetime’s worth of Shasta Twist.
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warrior cop @wyattprivilege.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
I GET LOGGED OUT. BUT I LOG IN AGAIN
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
Who else here automatically tilts their head like some kind of owl whenever they open a PDF that was rotated incorrectly?
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Kelsey 🪲🏴‍☠️ @11lizzie.bsky.social · 15/05/2026
happy P00P weekend series to all who celebrate
Phillies at Pirates scorebug says P0 0P
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 15/05/2026
What’s your favorite Death Cab for Cutie album? Here’s mine.
A grainy, sun-dappled photograph of John Lennon and Yoko Ono relaxing beneath a large oak tree in a grassy park. Yoko is leaning against the thick tree trunk, while John lies on the grass with his head resting in her lap. Lush green foliage and branches frame the top of the image, with soft sunlight filtering through the trees in the background.
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Zarah 📜 🐦‍⬛ Papercraft Corvid @zarah.tv · 13/05/2026
Assembled some kind of Elden Onion Ring on my sandwich today
Rings of raw onion assembled in some kind of runic pattern resembling Elden Ring on top of the open face of a sandwich.
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Ken Jennings @kenjennings.bsky.social · 13/05/2026
Listening to a single from a certain forthcoming record and thinking about this tweet.
the guy from modest mouse sings like someone is chasing him with a garden hose
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 13/05/2026
Super disappointed that SimpleText isn't a thing anymore.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
Captain Planet looking sad.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
Waking up May 6 after going a little too hard on the taco pizza and teremana.
static.klipy.com
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson's Iconic Eye Roll
Alt: Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson's Iconic Eye Roll
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
“FEEL THE BEAT FROM THE TAMBOURINE OH YEAH”
static.klipy.com
Woman Crying Ugly Tears
ALT: Woman Crying Ugly Tears
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
The first time I saw this movie was in a theater on good old honest film. Now I’m watching it on the top third of a sub-7 inch phone screen while the algorithm marks me as “middle aged male who likes movies featuring Abba music.” The gods gave us fire and this is what we did with it.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
“Dancing Queen” was never meant to induce an existential crisis, and yet…
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
90s Australian cinema has somehow had an indelible influence on me without me even realizing it.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
Rewatching “Muriel’s Wedding” for the first time in a while. Toni Collette is one of the most engaging actors of her entire generation.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 04/05/2026
Buffalo Wild Wings trivia had “Meat Loaf” as the answer to “Who wrote ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart?’” and as a person who owns “Bad for Good” on 8-track, I was personally offended.
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❤️🖤Maxie Powers🖤❤️ - 🏳️‍⚧️ @maxietheohtaku.bsky.social · 03/05/2026
It's-
Meme image of Devil May Cry 3, but the most of the logo is blurred but May 3. Dante is holding a giant blade behind his head, posing smugly.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
“Raindrops keep fallin’ on my head” was written by
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 28/04/2026
Either I left my 2000s cell phone too close to an unshielded speaker or I’m listening to “Peek 82454201”
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Rob Cee @therobcee.bsky.social · 27/04/2026
*giving toast at wedding* I believe it was the 90's poet DMX who famously said- *starts barking like a dog*
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 24/04/2026
This is exquisite film analysis 🧐
A screenshot of a Reddit comment by user wolfdickspeedstache that humorously summarizes the themes of four iconic films using variations of the phrase "being here":
• Clerks – I’m not even supposed to be here
• Office Space – I’m supposed to be there, but I’m not coming in
• Matrix – What is “here”?
• Fight Club – Was I already here?
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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 23/04/2026
Why would a ROBOT have an ACCENT. Talking about the terminator movie. Sorry this is about 40 years late I've been busy
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 24/04/2026
MFW Xtal hits on the playlist.
media.tenor.com
a man with his eyes closed in a blurry picture
ALT: a man with his eyes closed in a blurry picture
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 19/04/2026
My tv’s motion compensation when the strobe lights hit during Parasite #NineInchNoize #Coachella
media.tenor.com
a green power ranger and a red power ranger stand next to each other
ALT: a green power ranger and a red power ranger stand next to each other
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
Nine Inch Noize feels like walking into a Sam Goody on a Saturday afternoon wearing a Master of Puppets t-shirt.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
The outro to “Heresy” on Nine Inch Noize sounds like walking through the gates of the 90s Todd McFarlane version of Hell in like the best way.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
At some point my inability to refer to Vudu as Fandango at Home is going to out me as being old.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
We go together like 7th generation video game consoles and excessive bloom.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
The withering snowbank in my yard is at least 80% rabbit turds at this point.
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FR🎃 V🎃 @frovo.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
911: what is your emergency INVENTOR OF MILKSHAKES: help there’s like a million boys in my yard right now
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
Who here has listened to the entire Nine Inch Noize album at least twice today?
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
I tell you what, this here Gundam show could use more giant robots fighting.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
Nine Inch Nails fans haven’t eaten this well since 2018.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
Channeling my inner edgy 90s middle schooler by getting up early to watch the replay of the Nine Inch Noize set before church.
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Rob Cee @therobcee.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
At Texas Roadhouse, eating cups of cinnamon butter like jello shots.
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Ken Jennings @kenjennings.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
I just found out my kid thought Star Trek IV was a period piece, like the episodes where they go back to the Depression or Mark Twain or whatever.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
Get this man a keytar.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
Frolicking in the Jaunty Circle Pit at a Turnstile Show
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
That is one jaunty circle pit.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
The xx performance at Coachella was absolutely breathtaking. The epic California sunset didn’t hurt, but whoever designed the stage production deserves all the awards. 👩‍🍳 💋
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
David Lee Roth is on the Coachella main stage singing “Jump” in tight pants. The earth is healing.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
Tommy Boy is the better overall movie but Black Sheep has some of the best individual gags.
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David_j_roth @davidjroth.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
I'm going to fix Bluesky's user growth issues. I'm going to start posting about which MLB players have "George Lucas-ass names" again. Sorry about that.
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Rob Cee @therobcee.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
Look, I STILL don't know if that guy was Jimmy Ray... and I'm not sure I want to.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
*tech remotes in to fix outlook on spacecraft computer* Astronaut: yeah I’m just gonna head out to lunch, you got this right?
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 02/04/2026
Celebrating three dimensional villainy for Michael Fassbender’s birthday.
A triptych of three close-up images featuring actor Michael Fassbender in various film roles.
 * Left: Fassbender as Erik Lehnsherr (Magneto) from X-Men: First Class. He wears a sleek, metallic silver and purple helmet with a prominent "M" shape over the forehead and a yellow and navy tactical suit. He has a determined, intense expression.
 * Center: A dramatic, high-contrast close-up of Fassbender as Steve Jobs. He is wearing his iconic black turtleneck and round rimless spectacles, looking directly at the camera with a slight, knowing smirk.
 * Right: Fassbender as the android David from Prometheus. He has platinum blonde hair and is wearing a dark, futuristic spacesuit. He gazes thoughtfully at a glowing, blue holographic projection of Earth held between his hands.
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Statham Dayspring Askani’son @askulie.bsky.social · 02/04/2026
Whenever I think about the moon I think of this.
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al-boo @captainacabairbud.myatproto.social · 02/04/2026
bet they don’t even have any games on their phones up there smh
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