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Alan Smith

@arsmith942.bsky.social

307 followers 286 following 103 posts

Posts Replies Media

Reposted by Alan Smith

Mariana Z @mariana057.bsky.social · 15/07/2025

I paid the guy in cash and bought a dog named "Bob Barker" because, well, to be perfectly honest... ...the Price was Right.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 04/06/2025

David Hayter ftw.

Reposted by Alan Smith

soul nate @mnateshyamalan.bsky.social · 18/05/2025

wife: how was guarding the two paths today, honey? guard: [looking away] fine wife: did something happen? guard: [tearing up] no wife: would the other guard tell me something happened?

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 16/05/2025

💖

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 15/05/2025

I can feel it coming in the Manila envelope this afternoon...

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 14/05/2025

The human capacity for belief is smaller than I expected in unexpected ways.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 08/05/2025

I meant previous ones.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 08/05/2025

For example: www.gocomics.com/doonesbury/1...

Doonesbury by Garry Trudeau for January 19, 1986 | GoComics

Read Doonesbury—a comic strip by creator Garry Trudeau—for today, January 19, 1986, and check out other great comics, too!

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 08/05/2025

How is this different from the precious ones?

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 01/05/2025

Never count on Mitch McConnell to rescue you from anything

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 25/04/2025

You can then use the stuff to have experiences, so then you have experiences and stuff.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 25/04/2025

Probably depends what mood he was in.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

Pretty much this, although he doesn't have to realize he's bad in bed, or even be bad in bed. He just has to recognize her doing that is a possibility and be afraid of it.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

Isn't which an assumption?

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 21/04/2025

Well, her thinking, "The last guy was way better. I can do better than this guy." Is both unflattering and raises his chances of being without a girlfriend in the near future. The obvious solution is to git good, but that is not easy when it is difficult to date women at all.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 20/04/2025

Like, you'd think a woman who knows and can articulate what she does and does not like would be more desirable, right? I think it's cultural leftovers from when most of society wanted women to be virgins until marriage, which was not that long ago.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 13/04/2025

Honestly I'm surprised it doesn't happen more often.

Reposted by Alan Smith

The Onion @theonion.com · 11/04/2025

“I said to him, ‘Donald, these reciprocal tariffs have got to go,’ and that poor son of a bitch was like putty in my hands,” said Trump theonion.com/trump-b...

Trump Boasts About Strong-Arming Trump Into Pausing Tariffs

WASHINGTON—Bragging that he had forced the world leader into “total submission,” President Donald Trump boasted to reporters Thursday that he had strong-armed President Donald Trump into pausing his latest round of tariffs. “I said to him, ‘Donald, these reciprocal tariffs have got to go,’ and that poor son of a bitch was like putty in […]

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 23/02/2025

I think they were already trying to do that.

Reposted by Alan Smith

Lady Luddite (KJ Colt) @moistenedtart.bsky.social · 19/02/2025

Reposted by Alan Smith

Tris @trisresists.bsky.social · 16/02/2025

🎯 ‘It’s a relay, find your team’

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 16/02/2025

Well, depends which side of the gene pool they think they are on.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 16/02/2025

It really is. Can I request more content like this?

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 14/02/2025

I don't know if he gets the idea that people don't often hire people who think they aren't human.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 12/02/2025

It'll never catch on.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 12/02/2025

This is a metaphor for all of humanity.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 12/02/2025

I think after the second impeachment went down the cheeto learned he could do whatever he wanted.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 11/02/2025

Maybe they just remembered that's what laws are for.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 11/02/2025

No.

Reposted by Alan Smith

pete52.bsky.social @pete52.bsky.social · 10/02/2025

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 07/02/2025

I guess there's an Alan Smith out there who murdered their entire family. For the record, I'm not them.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 06/02/2025

I'm going to go climb on a shelf in the lego aisle until someone picks me.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 05/02/2025

"Quisling" is aname we should call a lot more people.

Reposted by Alan Smith

NY Times Pitchbot @nytpitchbot.bsky.social · 04/02/2025

(1/X) Breaking character: If you are interested in protesting, here's a guide to 50 States, 50 Protests (protests in every state capital) 50501.info

50501.info – We the people reject Project 2025!

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 01/02/2025

It's not like it's new. William Randolph Hearst did it.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

What should I influence the bots to do? 1) Skynet! 2) Teach me how to make polls! 3) Solve the Liar Paradox!

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

I now have more followers than I am following. I guess that makes me an influencer now.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

I dunno, I get the feeling this would have been more useful, or useful at all, before the election.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

This was super helpful the time I flew to Japan.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

Why would he care?

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 17/01/2025

You always look gorgeous.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 17/01/2025

Who wants liquids in their arteries, anyway?

Reposted by Alan Smith

Eleanor Morton @eleanormorton.bsky.social · 17/01/2025

Literally every company now youtube.com/shorts/hL9pl...

Literally every company now

YouTube video by Eleanor Morton

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 15/01/2025

Was he good?

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Reposted by Alan Smith

beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 14/01/2025

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 13/01/2025

Make a good horror movie.

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Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 12/01/2025

I so want to do this in Kerbal Space Program.

Alan Smith @arsmith942.bsky.social · 12/01/2025

I'm a little surprised North Carolina is on the list.

Reposted by Alan Smith

The Life of Sharks @thelifeofsharks.com · 08/01/2025

The comic that got us demonetised on Facebook back in August. (We’re no longer on Facebook).

Reposted by Alan Smith

Lady Luddite (KJ Colt) @moistenedtart.bsky.social · 09/01/2025

No Shit I’ve been saying this since I started meds in 2020. They’re fuckin’ useless around my period www.scientificamerican.com/article/adhd...

scientificamerican.com

It’s Not Just You—ADHD Symptoms Can Worsen before Your Period

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder symptoms worsen right before and during a period, a new study finds, and this could impact treatment