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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton

@apothecaryhelm.bsky.social

365 followers 324 following 276 posts

Wülferhampton’s friendly quack 🦆 Purveyor of miracle cures including g’Eau for Cough™️ and The Powder™️ Confidentiality *not* guaranteed. #Wülferhampton

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

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The Simpsons: Homer Simpson Hides in Bush

ALT: The Simpsons: Homer Simpson Hides in Bush

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

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Ukodor: This - Fabled42

ALT: Ukodor: This - Fabled42

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Not to worry, dear lady. We have plenty of the vile smelling stuff. We just have to collect it from the latrine pits.

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ALT: Wut Undead

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

*Public Service Announcement* GET YOUR VACCINES! Do not believe what the charlatan claims in his book. Your apothecary recommends a quicker way to meet your maker. Piss off @wulfhelm.bsky.social

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

But that’s where the @meadhallwench.bsky.social comes in.

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

Apothecary is currently busy taking inventory. Contents of @wulfhelm.bsky.social’s pustule can be safely collected to be used by the Mead Hall Cook to season the sprouts.

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Ah, Mr Fyrd! We have missed you! Not to worry, plenty of g’Eau For Cough in stock.

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Man Says You're Welcome

ALT: Man Says You're Welcome

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 04/08/2026

Yes, he is.

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Silent Hill Nurse Waving

ALT: Silent Hill Nurse Waving

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

We do not offer our DL any health-related advice. We want to live. In peace.

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

Apologies, dear lady. Have been extremely busy lately.

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Plate Spinning Stage Performance

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

Plenty in stock, milady.

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Baby Powder Powder

ALT: Baby Powder Powder

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 28/06/2026

We get those ‘Death by Pin Cushion’ cases quite often. #OnlyInWülferhampton

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 15/06/2026

@themeadhallbard.bsky.social please ensure @theselectfyrd.bsky.social knows that the Apothecary has stocked up on g’Eau for Cough for when he returns.

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Luankct Plague Doctor

ALT: Luankct Plague Doctor

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 16/05/2026

Not to worry. Howling is good for the humors.

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 16/05/2026

Your #Wülferhampton Apothecary is always happy to help.

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Steve Hale: That's What I'm Here For

ALT: Steve Hale: That's What I'm Here For

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 13/05/2026

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Xstaci's Playful Wink and Smile

ALT: Xstaci's Playful Wink and Smile

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 13/05/2026

She? Who’s that?

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 08/05/2026

This should help with the burning.

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Animated Tabasco Hot Sauce & Chili Pepper

ALT: Animated Tabasco Hot Sauce & Chili Pepper

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 03/05/2026

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a man in a black costume with a mask on his face and a hat

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 27/04/2026

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a man in a white shirt is standing in front of a pink fence

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 27/04/2026

Gazza mate, getting too technical for Wülferhampton, I reckon. My plague mask should suffice, even in the latrines.

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 27/04/2026

Will this PPE do?

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a silhouette of a man with a long beak walking on the beach

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 27/04/2026

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a man with a mustache says whatever

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 27/04/2026

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a person in a darth vader costume is standing in front of a white wall .

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 27/04/2026

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a man in a yellow suit is carrying a black box

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

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a close up of a person holding a syringe with liquid coming out of it and a man in the background .

ALT: a close up of a person holding a syringe with liquid coming out of it and a man in the background .

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

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a doctor in a white coat is holding a patient 's arm and saying `` bend over ... '' .

ALT: a doctor in a white coat is holding a patient 's arm and saying `` bend over ... '' .

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

Quite the opposite.

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a man in a suit and tie is smiling .

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

Rather a serious case, I see. He did mean bollocks, I take it?

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

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a man in a scrub is talking to a woman and says how can i help

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 30/03/2026

We recommend the scrapings from the latrine pits for flaccidness.

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a circle of mud with bubbles coming out of it and snow in the background

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 13/03/2026

At your service.

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a close up of a person 's hand wearing a latex glove holding something .

ALT: a close up of a person 's hand wearing a latex glove holding something .

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 06/03/2026

@wulfhelm.bsky.social your Apothecary at your service.

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 05/03/2026

Have you been cuntaminated? Drop in for a FREE consultation. We may or may not* be able to help you. *probably the latter

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 02/03/2026

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a man with a beard and tattoos is smiling and asking if he would like to buy some adhesive

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 26/02/2026

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a doctor in a white coat is holding a patient 's arm and saying `` bend over ... '' .

ALT: a doctor in a white coat is holding a patient 's arm and saying `` bend over ... '' .

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 24/02/2026

Miss that gif here on blooskaii.

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a baby is making a funny face while looking at the camera .

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 21/02/2026

Oh dear! Cracked ribs? Make sure your ‘cough doesn’t get any worse 😁

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 29/01/2026

Your friendly Apothecary wishes @theselectfyrd.bsky.social, Mrs Fyrd and the hounds a safe and jolly adventure 😁

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a pixel art illustration of a van with a christmas tree on top of it

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 27/01/2026

The aroma from the latrine pits is Wülferhampton’s signature scent.

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 19/01/2026

We deal with all types of leaks.

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a man is dancing in front of flex tape containers

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 19/01/2026

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a cartoon character is wearing a conical hat and the number four is written on it .

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 19/01/2026

Not taking your meds again @theselectfyrd.bsky.social ?

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 18/01/2026

😘

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 18/01/2026

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a nurse wearing a white uniform is using a hand sanitizer dispenser

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 15/01/2026

Your apothecary, at your service.

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a man with long hair and a beard is saying `` i can certainly help '' while sitting in a chair .

ALT: a man with long hair and a beard is saying `` i can certainly help '' while sitting in a chair .

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 24/12/2025

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a cartoon of a green monster standing next to a man in a red coat

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Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 23/12/2025

Who said the Apothecary was sane?

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a man in a suit and tie is sitting in the back seat of a car and smiling .

ALT: a man in a suit and tie is sitting in the back seat of a car and smiling .

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 23/12/2025

@theselectfyrd.bsky.social has volunteered to do the malleting.

Apothecary Helm of Wülferhampton @apothecaryhelm.bsky.social · 23/12/2025

And to you, sir. We are expecting a delivery of cork plugs.