iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

michael Swaim 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ @michaelswaim.bsky.social · 06/04/2026

Veni, Veni, Veni: An Historical Overview of Ancient Roman Bukkake Practices

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

Daniel Fienberg @thefienprint.bsky.social · 09/02/2026

The Patriots shall not be vanquished till Birnam wood remove to Dunsinane!

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

Meredith Nudo 🤌🏻 @meredithnudo.myatproto.social · 21/10/2025

Every side of the tracks is the bad side of the tracks in Houston, because the trains are stalled and we can't get anywhere.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 07/10/2025

"The thing about me is that I hate raw tomatoes but love them cooked 😜" Yeah man, I feel the same way about potatoes. That is neither interesting nor rare. "No but like, I'll even eat ketchup 😂" I eat pico de gallo but would hesitate to bite into a raw onion; this isn't as weird as you're acting.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 29/08/2025

Absolutely inappropriate that "Progressives" are calling Texas Governor Greg Abbott "Hot Wheels." Hot Wheels are fun, and children are generally safe around them.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 05/07/2025

I heard we were watching movies named for what day it is today

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

Timothy Eggert 🎭 @dangertim.bsky.social · 20/06/2025

Join @sassterpiece.bsky.social at COMICPALOOZA as we defend the galaxy against the Terran Empire as seen in #StarTrek #Section31 SATURDAY JUNE 21st at 5PM* in GRB 330! * schedule subject to change - get the app and add us - FREE to all Saturday attendees 18 and up! #comedy #MST3Kish #liveshow

Join Sassterpiece Theatre just outside Federation territory (aka Comicpalooza) as we defend the galaxy against a hostile, terrible movie! Stand with us SATURDAY JUNE 21st at 5PM* in GRB 330 as we unleash photon torpedoes and some jokes against the Terran Empire as seen in #StarTrek #Section31 !

* schedule always subject to change - get the app and add us to your CP25 itinerary - FREE to all Saturday Comicpalooza attendees 18 and up!

#comedy #MST3Kish #liveshow

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

Timothy Eggert 🎭 @dangertim.bsky.social · 19/06/2025

🖖 INCOMING STARFLEET COMMUNIQUE (from Captain Kei)

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

Kei 💖 DJ Crescendoll @azregreis.bsky.social · 19/06/2025

Ready for Comicpalooza this weekend where I’ll be performing with @parassect.bsky.social @dangertim.bsky.social @eneloquent.bsky.social as @sassterpiece.bsky.social riffs Section 31! Join us Saturday at 5pm in Room 330 as we lose the plot, the point, and the prime directive in this mess of a movie!

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 29/05/2025

The problem with the argument of "If men should be experienced and women should be virgins, who are the men getting experience with?" is that while it's a valid critique of purity culture, it is unfortunately also the perfect opening for a Yo Mama joke.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 06/05/2025

Caption on magic eye reads, "Not a bird or a plane." Right Brain: Ah, this must resolve to a picture of Superman! Left Brain: There are a near-infinite number of objects that are neither birds nor planes.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 01/04/2025

When someone asks about dating an ex of mine and I'm feeling charitable

A case of orange Coca-Cola has a handwritten note on it which reads, "I was not a fan but maybe you will like it. Please enjoy!"

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 28/03/2025

"If you're going to act like a little baby, then I'm going to treat you like a little baby." -me to my 8 month old

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 26/03/2025

The man's turnaround time is truly unbelievable

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 26/03/2025

One question still not answered by the #Severance #Finale: how the hell Milchick got in trouble for his word usage when his predecessor was Harmony "I speak like the book of Leviticus" Cobel

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 19/03/2025

I got a raise at work, so I'm going to celebrate by going out to dinner somewhere 3.1% more expensive than I would normally go.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 10/03/2025

I dunno, I think I might assume this expires the day before

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 09/03/2025

A swinger with a nice ass has a pineapple upside-down cake

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 27/02/2025

Started watching Severence last night, and the new season of The Magnus Protocol just dropped the first episode. Big day for menial office workers largely in the dark about their mysterious employer's nefarious goals.

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

Kumail Nanjiani @kumail.bsky.social · 18/02/2025

Yeah I know people say anxiety is bad, but mine has just been collecting all the possible things that can go wrong so far. Once it has an exhaustive catalog of every possible mishap, it’ll move on to suggesting solutions and then you better watch out.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 13/02/2025

Amazing production value, but parts of the production seemed unpolished, almost improvised. The finale was an uncoordinated mess. And I think the villain came out and punched a random audience member? The Moulin Rouge should stick to burlesque. Overall I give "Spectacular, Spectacular" 2/5 stars.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 10/02/2025

It would be irresponsible for me to take a 20 minute nap in the middle of my workday just because I'm working from home. Better scroll for a solid hour instead.

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

nattie winters @utilitylimb.bsky.social · 07/02/2025

doing an akira slide into the room on a horse, breaking all of its legs

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 07/02/2025

"Amazing production value, but parts of the show seemed unpolished, almost improvised. The finale was an uncoordinated mess. Also, the villain punched am audience member? The Moulin Rouge should stick to burlesque shows. Overall I give 'Spectacular, Spectacular' 2/5 stars."

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 06/02/2025

Microdosing human interaction by sending people memes

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 04/02/2025

I casually lamented that none of my credit cards offer points on medical expenses and then realized that's one of the most #American thoughts I've ever had.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 03/02/2025

Scream at a man in a cinema, and you ruin his movie for the day. Teach a man to recognize the Wilhelm Scream in cinema, and you ruin movies for life.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

It's a shame Yiddish is a dead language, because we would definitely have a word for someone who excitedly shows you a meme 3 months after you've seen it

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 27/01/2025

Picturing the absolute HORROR of my ancestors from millenia ago as they watch me pour out a bunch of perfectly good salt to clean a pan they probably wouldn't even consider dirty

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 26/01/2025

"Roll the Old Chariot Along" is just "Wheels on the Bus" translated into Sea Shanty

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 26/01/2025

Gonna run through some hits*, maybe some cat photos *I liked them, at least

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 15/01/2025

My reaction to the woman who had sex with 1507 people in 12 hours is identical to Brennan Lee Mulligan's reaction to finding out Grant O'Brien went down on 50 people at a party: No judgement, no slut-shaming, just an immediate and involuntary need to solve it as a math/logistics problem.

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 02/01/2025

The irony is not lost on me that the battery-powered menorah I got did not have enough charge to last through all of #Chanukah

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 29/12/2024

This cannot be the way I found out former president Jimmy Carter has died

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 19/12/2024

I don't believe in Santa Claus. He's real, I just don't think he can pull it off this year.

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

Timothy Eggert 🎭 @dangertim.bsky.social · 11/12/2024

Join us on Twitch next Tuesday Dec 17 @ 8pm CT as Sassterpiece Theatre’s annual tradition continues with Hallmarkening V: The Cliché Strikes Back! SassterpieceTheatre.com

A riffed still from A BILTMORE CHRISTMAS, this year’s Hallmarkening selection.

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Reposted by Michael. You know, Michael.

Timothy Eggert 🎭 @dangertim.bsky.social · 09/12/2024

Clear your calendar for next Tuesday Dec 17 @ 8pm CT and bookmark this Twitch channel as Sassterpiece Theatre’s annual tradition continues with Hallmarkening V: The Cliché Strikes Back! Twitch.Tv/Sassterpiece...

Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 06/10/2024

I was apparently user #1,086,202, and missing the first million will forever haunt me

A virtual certificate with text "Celebrating 10M users on Bluesky, #1,086,202, Michael. You know, Michael. ‪@parassect.bsky.social‬, joined on Sep 19, 2023"

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 13/10/2023

A significant portion of my followers (4 out of 6, specifically) are in the right geographic area to come to the Texas Renaissance Festival, and so I encourage you to get tickets to the Pub Crawl I'm running! www.etix.com/ticket/e/103...

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 12/10/2023

IF ENOUGH PEOPLE DON'T SIGN UP FOR THE 11 AM PUB CRAWL THIS SATURDAY, I WILL EAT THE SUN www.etix.com/ticket/e/103...

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 05/10/2023

Hey all 4 people on Bluesky! If you're around the Texas Renaissance Festival, I'm the leader of their official pub crawl this year! www.texrenfest.com/things-to-do...

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Michael. You know, Michael. @parassect.bsky.social · 21/09/2023

This app is called BLUE sky. You had one job.

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